I went down to the local with a mate or two,
last orders at 11, so we joined the clubbing...

Dear Father Christmas I've been such a good boy
Please will you bring me some lovely new toys...

My friend Georgie was feeling ill so i wrote this...
Georgie Porgie pudding n' pie...

Should I tell you just how i feel?
or keep it locked away, pretend this isn't real...

Let's go and have lunch at Maccy D's
We'll get a burger with extra cheese...

Accusations, screams and lies.
Look at the Mother with greedy eyes...

Monkey Monkey in the tree
have you a spare banana for me...

You led me on you seemed so keen,
You were more beautiful, than all that I've seen...

So many weirdo's on the net
Who love people They've never met...