Ever get the feeling that....

You want to die but also you dont, that you cant see yourself living, you cant see yourself ever being successful. that maybe forever you'll be a fuck up. do you ever feel like nobody cares. when you ask for help you dont get it. just when you feel hopeful the system lets you down. the system sucks. will i just be another statistic of how many people the system has failled. when im dead will they then realise they should have done more.

the system im refering to is the so called nhs mental health system. alot of you guys are from the usa, australia etc n beleive me you are lucky. over here you actually have to hear voices or harm somebody or be dead before they do anything. for 6 years they havent done fuck all but refer me from one thing to another. it just pisses me off. it actually took me so much courage to go to my doctor n get him to refer me to em n then they let me down.

Yes...to the feeling, but iv learned that any system sucks so much i dont deal with them

Yeah I live with that feeling everyday, but honestly I cant place anymore blame on the "system" or any other person than myself. So far I am a failure, I've let everyone down who has ever cared about me, but most of all I let myself down... and I let myself go, but I fight everyday to find that person inside of me again. If you give up your just embracing the person everyone has come to expect failure from. Happiness comes from within, I've found you only set yourself up for disappointment if you count on others or drugs or self harm to fill the void. Everyday is a new, everyday is a blessing... I haven't found a cure yet, but what I've learned lately is that, you need to do what you believe is right, go back to the start... back to the last time you were truly happy and work on fixing the mistakes you made along the way. When I want to die, I repeat the word forgive over and over... sometimes I scream it through sobs. At first I thought I was trying to forgive others, but I realized that most of all I need to forgive myself. Hang in there, we all make mistakes, if you can forgive yourself you will come to believe in yourself and you will be successful... This is what I believe, but its the hardest thing I've ever done. Make a promise to yourself, that you won't quit until your happy... and keep it.

DJ those are very powerful words they inspired me and helped me Thanks:D & Yes i get that feeling too

I am the same way