Have you ever?? (please no rudeness here)

For the one's out here who are self harmer's who have just started,or have done it for a long time,but are trying to control it from getting worse. In one of those darkened moments, where you are lost in the darkness, and you start to become reckless with yourself, and before you go for the blade, (or item you use) do you space out and imagine yourself cutting so deep,the next your looking down and your wrist is all f*cked up? then when you snap out of this spell and you look down to see you had not done that. has this happened to you? sometimes I fear that I am half tempted to do this for real, because when I'm in these spells I'm not safe anywhere,I scare myself, and I feel helpless knowing that the next time I go for the blade I could end up doing this. I'm fully aware of what I'm doing a lot of the time, but other time's I could careless...

Please reply with your thoughts...
or If your shy, just write me a msg to my inbox.

~maddy~

Wow that sounds immense. no i havent ever been like that. i used to cut but i just cut i didnt ever have such feelings. its good your not actually doing it but still quite scary the way you think about it. if your scared about doing it for real i suggest you share you concerns with a doctor or something. i think its a priority that you find the cause of your behaviour so you can put it to a stop. by the sounds of it you dont want to do and i dont think you should. remember the scars, think about the future, in many years to come & you still have these scars. a constant reminder and an ugly one at that which you always feel conscious about and have to hide. i still have scars & it sucks.

This should be in the cutting thread at the top of the page...

All self harm needs to be placed in the cutting thread at the top of the page.

For this reason alone I am locking this thread.