Any Suggestions?

Ok i know i am only 15, i get put down alot because that is my age, i know that i am not the only one going through something like this in my life. I probably have the same stories millions of other girls have around the earth. My parents have told me so many times that i should not complain about my life because other people have had it alot worse. Just because i saw my cousin commit suicide, just because my grandfather molested me just because my parents are over obsessive freaks just because the only guy i have ever loved and i gave everything to, is no longer mine because i never see him and summer is coming so there is no hope for us, ( we are still young so better not commit over the summer that nothing will happen because it'll be that much worse) the only thing i am doing with him is having sex w/ him because it feels thats the only way i can ever be close to him now which makes me feel totally empty. just because my parents will never accept me for who i am,they hate my poetry (my mom took away all my black clothing saying i was sinning and i was going to hell) just because .so many other things have happened i have heard many opinions saying i have no right to be depressed. Please i am not looking for pity 'cause i know this is life but come on.....its like i've lost my life without it even starting.....i feel so crushed and i don't want to keep this fight up anymore....i just want a little help

Your parents sound alot like mine...if you ever wanna talk I'm here!

It sounds like you have been through so much more than I have...and I'm still depressed. Sometimes it just happens...and when other people say that you don't have the right to be depressed...well seriously...who has the right to decide that? You are your own person! Don't let other people's opinions affect you.
Now for the help part...(I'll try..even though I've never been good at helping people...)
Whenever I feel so overwhelmed with life that I feel like I can't go on...I just force myself to sit down and really think about it. It seems like everything is falling apart and not worth living, but you have to think of something (however small) that does make you happy. For me...it was my friends. I don't have many...but the people who are my true friends were not the ones I thought they'd be. You just have to find them. I thought about what I enjoyed about life...like marshmallows in chocolate. (lol...weird example...but i hope you get my point :)
You've only got one chance to live, and sometimes it gets messed up along the way, or it seems like it's too messed up to fix...but it's ok. It hasn't ended..so who knows what else may happen.
Just stay strong and believe that life will get better...it's hard..trust me..I know...but just keep living.
(wow...that was reallllly long....)

Your mom sounds very religious (which can be a pain in the back side when it comes to things like this), and by the looks of it ive had an easy life compeard to yours, i mean iv never gone with out my mum made sure of that, and she even offerd to sort out the bulling i had gone through (in other words scare them to death)

No one can say you havent got the right to be depressed you cant help but be depressed its an emotion that cant be hidden.

If they dont like your poetry then their not worth the effort of showing it to them, only two peeople i hang around with know i write poetry and after that i disided i would keep it to my self.

I dont know how to word what i want to say about your feeling of emptyness, but you are probaby feeling empty because your in a way bi-passing to get to a place you want to be but you just cant quiet get there so it feels like your taking one step forward and three steps back all the time.

Hope things are getting better
u can pm me about it if u still want advice

xx

I can listen without judging
i can talk without anger
i can cry alongside you
i can guide you back to the light

let me

pm me i am james by the way hi

When i said my parents were really overprotective i guess it didn't help that they found out i was cutting when i was passed out on the bed with blood gushing out...=[......theydont know but i also took pills......lots of them..........thats a crazy story....
Thank you guys .....yall really have been helpful and i am breathing and my heart is beating so that means i am still alive.....so i am good i guess..=]
thank you all though very much

The black clothes, sad poetry, to them just point out all of theings they don't want to see in you, it doesn't justify things said or done, but it could be the case. I know my mom was not always a fan of my poetry because it was too dark for her and she always complained that I dressed in nothing but black, however she knew that was just me being who I was at the time, so she didn't impede, my dad could have cared less as long as I wasn't getting in trouble. I went through some of the same things as you in my younger years and there was a big period of my life where I could never shake that empty feeling. If you ever want a sounding board feel free to message me.

I'm also 15, and I do get put down alot too. I've been through alot. I had an abusive boyfriend when I was 13. I've befriended murderers. Almost gotten killed a few times. I've almost been raped a few times. I was forced to give head while at gunpoint. Some of my "friends" would force me to kill cats, dogs, rats, and other animals with them. I've seen things I shouldn't have... some I can hardly speak let alone type.
I know you're depressed. Believe me, I was too at the period in life you are going through. I went through a huge depression at a very young age, and I'm still struggling with it today. But what I can suggest it to keep yourself busy! Write poems :) Write a book. Do your homework. Read. Learn an instrument. Play a sport. Talk to a friend. Draw or paint. Anything to keep yourself busy. That way you will benefit from depression instead of losing your mind. :)

Thanks for the advice^^..=] the funny things is i write constantly, i always draw, i get strait A's, i play the piano at home and in skl i am in band i play snare, ....but i do suck at sports ...lol and my town is so small that if you do not play basketball then there is no sport you can do the coaches already hate me and kicked me out because i talked back to them.....=[ we have no drama club....i would love that.......but thank you

Thank you all so much.......=]

"that's not your fault but you have treated yourself as though it is. Every time you cut yourself he molests you again, every time you hurt yourself you give those who mistreat you power over you."

^Wow. I've never seen it put like that.

Yeah thanks .....I know a whole lot of things are gonna have to change for me but wish me luck.....=P

Thank you again to everyone ....and if yall have any comments or ever wanna pm then thanks

^^ omg that's soo sad, I've never seen someone die before... it mustuve been really hard

As for pretty gun, poetry and drawing and black clothes and other stuff are all ways of expressing feelings and getting them out, so never stop.
Your mom should be helping you not taking away your ways of getting help. and as for having sex with your boyfriend be really careful especially cuz now you're really valnrable and are seeking sex as a way of comfort, don't think about it that way cuz it could get you into problems you don't need.

All ur parents want is the best 4 u...