There Goes My Heart

please read my new poem "There Goes My Heart"
I will do the same for you.
I would mean so much to me =)

hugs from me

I read the poem and please don't take offense, but it contains so many technical flaws that I was very distracted. If I sound harsh, that is not my intention. I see that you are from Sweden and I am assuming that English is not your first language. If you would like, I will email you the corrections I believe you need to make to improve this poem.

My comments here only apply to mistakes in language and grammar, etc. I am not in any way criticizing the content of your poem which I thought was quite good.
--Lydia