Im pregnant

hey, at least he's sticking around for your child, although I don't think it's right that he want's to have 'fun'. Shouldn't he have thought about that before he asked you to marry him?

I think MAYBE you should wait around a few weeks, because he will probably realise that you are the best thing for him, not a bunch of girls in a club.

I hope I have helped a little x

ok let m etell u ur bf is a asshole. my husband wnet thru the let me go out with the boys b4 the bbay is born thing but never never would he have hooked up with any females.or said lets be friends. taking space as in spending time alone otr with friends now acting single and maybe messign round is not cool.ur pregnant with his child he should be completely loyal to u and by ur side desptie teh mood swings tahst totally natural.newayz my point before i ramble lol is taht he shouldnt be allowe dot do as he please then coem to you whenevr hes doen tahst not fair to you. makes ya wonder if down the rad after your hild is born hell pull teh i need space card when you need him the most.if you aloow him to do it now hell do it later. ioculd be wrong just my outlook you deserve better both for urself and for ur child.lots of luck with the pregnancy been tehre dotn miss it =). what u having btw boy or girl ..

have you explained to him that you feel this way? maybe if you told him what you were worried about or maybe set some 'rules' with him? Like he should have a responsible friend with him or something. I know it sounds very childish but it might help.....

Cool about haveing a girl. Have you thought of any names yet?!

hey dont let his age let taht be his excuse my hsu is 20 now he was 17 when i wa spregnant 18 when our son was born and he werks full time and im a stay at home mom his age is no excsuse 4 his actions he was mature and responsible enough to make a baby so he should act responsibliy.i knw how hard it is being pregnanta nd how bad u can feel bout yrslef at times. he has no right to b pitign ou thru this right now its not what u need. i know ist hard but if uve told him how u feel and he continues he snot worth it. he hsould respect ho w u feel and treat you how you deserve and if hes freakign bout being a father he should take a second and think of how your feeling his fears are nthing comapred to yours.dont let him do thatto you.if he sgona be involved in your life and is thining bout marraige he needs to show you hes committed thru the good and hard times and frankly hes not showing taht right now. that a very nice name btw youve picked out my lil boy is nathan =). newayz tahst besides teh point lol. you need to werk things out now b4 u commit urslef cause once your married what hes doing now doenst fly.he need sto make a choice eitehr be with yuo always or not at all ist not fair to you for him to go when he pleases and it ownt b fair to your daughter if he were to just flake on you guys down the raod. goodluck with your pregnancy dotn stress ist bad for the baby!

im from fl as well .. where abouts are you?? jw..

you kkno what thatsthe father of ur child and potential soon to b husband . you shouldnt be tellign him to be friends with nefits so taht he doenst sleep with otehr girls he shouldnt be doign that in teh 1st palce and as far as having his "fun" now he needed to grow up the sec you all found out you were pregnant.the stuff hes feedign is staright bulshit all excsues so he can go out and party hook up ahave a great time whiel ur stuck at home pregnant as hell and not feel bad for his actions tahst garbage.if he wnats to support you love you and take care of you tahst should have started at the beginning of your pegnany not after the aby is born.i hate men liek taht there jerks and a shame to all the good men. im truly sry ur going thru this right now at this time when u need to b ur most relaxed.

i hope it werks out tho .. good luck

im in tampa btw

Hey Gina,
i know it is not fair that he is having "fun" while your sick i think he should stay and help his future wife and his soon to be born baby. but the good thing about this guy is that he says he will help out with your child. most guys would have "fun" and would not give a $#@# about his kid so you do have a real nice guy with you!

wow people try to sugarcoat everything. 1st of all, ur the one that got urself pregnant with his kid. 2nd of all, hes an asshole and im surprised u didnt realize this in the 3 years u've been with him. it doesnt seem like hes gunna help u raise this baby at all. and also. if ur going to get married. y would u have sex with him b4 that time. just wondering. bcuz it doesnt seem like that turned out very well. but anywayz. if hes gunna be like that, then it seems as though u might as well be a single parent. bcuz it really doesnt seems like he cares at all. so tell him that. tell him that if he doesnt help u get through the pregnancy then ur not going to let him be a part of the childs life. bcuz it doesnt seem like hes doing a very good job of being a parent and the baby isnt even born yet. and u said u have no family to turn to, but wut about friends? misery loves company.

geez stop being such a guy alex. even if shes emotional, hello shes having a baby moron! he needs time by himself. ya to be with other girls and not worry about her? he should worry about her! shes pregnant! and right its horrible for guys when we have our periods and we're pregnant and we get mood swings. how about how horrible it is for us when we're on our periods and we're bringing another life into the world. geez. use ur brain please. i know ur a guy, but honestly, this stupid? i really didnt expect it, believe it or not.

alex, sorry to say but i have to agree with yasmin, but maybe not so critical. and even though i too am only 14 years old, it doesn't mean that i am nieve. i know how a guy should treat someone that he supposedly loves. he really shouldn't be going out clubbing while she is home sick, i mean its 50% his fault that she is pregnant. maybe he says that he still loves u but he needs his space, and you should respect that, but not whenever he is going and dancing with other girls. and even though we might have mood swings and act really stupid while we are on our periods, its not like we can help not having cramps or not feeling that great either. and my gosh, pregnancy is probably 10 times worst. i think you should talk to him, i mean tell him that how you feel, and don't let him disrespect you anymore than he already has.

Alex I believe that the comment about her being only fourteen was very uncalled for. Age makes no difference...I've been raising a kid since I was fourteen.....
And I believe that yes he deserves freedom but no he shouldn't be asking you to just be friends and go off cheating on you with random girls, etc. It's wrong....you probably will be better off raising the kid yourself, it's hard but I believe you can do it....

Kalika

He is either dedicated to you and your child or not. Nothing is going to change after the baby is born, he cant come back THEN and play daddy if he wasnt there all along. It doesnt work like that, he is obviously too immature to settle down.

Alex- i wasnt necessarily judging u, i was judging ur post. and how u presented urself and the way u acted. i commented on that. so i may not know u, but i know ur views on this topic, so yes, i can judge ur viewpoint.

and thanks rayn and Kalika. im glad we can agree.

To blood red tears: your an idiot.
A woman should never, EVER wait for a man. The second he says he want so thave "fun without her" tells you he's a horrible person and should be left with no one. A woman shoulD NEVER be treated so disrespectfully.

Alright, I know that you think this guy is a good guy and you know him better than me (obviously) but trust me, he isn't.
guys (and girls...but you all have to admit mostly guys) have a way of manipulation. He of course is going to tell you that he loves you and he might even actually marry you, but he WILL cheat on you. I can tell you this now.
Anyone who dares to treat a woman like that doesn't deserve to be in a relationship at all.
He will pull tricks on you- buy you jewelry, make you dinner, (something wonderfully romantic) but trust me, no matter how sincere he does it, he doesn't care about you.
He does need to be involved in the child's life (though I do not know how the child will turn out being raised around such a father) not because he deserves it or has a right to it, but because it's his responsibility to provide for this child and pay for it's expenses and help take care of it.
When he says "fun" and "dance with girls" he means have sex with other girls because he no longer wants you. I know thats brutal, but I'm sorry thats the way it is.
My advice, force yourself to get over him. Tell him he disrespected you in a manner that no man should, and that he can never be a part of your life again. Tell him your worth more than him, and that you will raise the child together, but will never be involved romantically again.

I don't think your strong enough to do that considering your question...no offense
but it's my advice, it's what I would do.

p.s. Yasmin, I totally agree with you. I was trying to be less brutal, but, you know. I support everything you said in your statement. Well said

ok yeah sure i think he needs his space too but he DOESN't need space with other girls! space=aloone!

thanks pinkalias

and i like ur statement rayn. spece=alone. awesome way of putting that

and alex. ur last post. wow. if ur gunna say something... haha i dont even know wut to say to u.

and nykki. uhh... u might wanna get tested to find out if ur pregnant. and if u arent, thank God for that. and try to turn ur life around. try to turn it around now. u cant smoke and drink. not just bcuz u might be having a baby, just bcuz its hurts u and it hurts other people around u. and drinming makes u do stupid things. like get pregnant for instance. and if u are pregnant, then u really need to change. bcuz then its not just for u its for the baby too. and then i suggest putting the baby up for adoption. just bcuz it doesnt seem ur the best person to take care of it. no offense meant but i dont think that 13 yer olds should be raising babies on their own. good luck with that whole thing.

(thats how u talk to people alex)

Alex, replying to your first comment:

Your obviously the same version of the jackass were discussing now.

A guy has no right to "have space with other girls" that is incredibly rediculous. your telling her to let him treat her like an object, like something that he can screw over, then go out do whatever he wants, and when he comes back she'll of course be there waiting going through hell.

He or NO GUY has any right to do that.
EVER
no matter what the age, not matter what the circumstance. He got her pregnant, he can't have fun anymore, thats the consequence.
When a guy gets a girl pregnant on accident, they both lose the privilage of having fun, and they BOTH have to devote their lives entirely to the child. he can't decide to go out and do whatever he wants untill he feels like comming back.

Also, you say your older than her fiance, well you sound like an immature 13 year old asshole who knows nothing about respect or raising a child.

woo right on! i completely agree. 100% u just said everything.

Babygurl I have been where you are I have two sons now please email me if you wanna talk :o)

i aint sayin he is rite but maybe this guy needs abit of time to grow up maybe he has just realised howmuch he has actually got an its shocked him slightly an he is scared of growin up knowin he has reasurance is all you can do

I know you guys are saying that he needs to grow up. But, if he wasn't ready to grow up, he shouldn't have taken the adult action of having sex.
I know that sounds rediculous considering that it's nearly impossible to stop teens from having sex, so I guess what I should say is having unprotected sex.
When the guy (and girl) made that choice, they lost all time to grow up. I see what Alex means by it's better now THAN later, but it still has no justification whatsoever for him going out and doing it. He proposed to a woman, pledged his love to HER, so what gives him right to go out with other girls?
If he wasn't ready to devote his full self to this woman, then why did he propose?
Also, of course guys don't like being told what to do, no one does, including girls (I seriously hope your not implying that they should be told what to do, because if you are, I would have to go crazy.)
he's not being told what to do, but it's his moral responsibility to take it on himself to stay at home and help the woman carry this child.
Also...he has no right to tell the woman to sit back and take all this while he's out having fun, and then wait for him when he decides to come back.