Ask Joe Column.

Hello fellow members, I am starting something new called the, "Ask Joe Column" you can ask me any questions pertaining to myself, to you, advice seeking, love, friendship, etc. Ask me about almost anything at all, as long as it applies to the rules and regulations of the site.

Is it wrong that i am having sexual thoughts about my sisters husband?

My answer to that is Yes.

First of all you are 14 at least that's what it says in your profile. If your sister is married (which she is since she has a husband) she must be older than you, which makes him older than you. And if I am not mistaken a lot older than you.

Although I must say at that age you are usually going through puberty and those types of thoughts are usually running though your mind, so it is quiet normal to think those types of thoughts (as long as you don't try and act upon them)

Death is always a hard topic for one' to talk about especially when it involves a loved one.

I believe you are taking it harder this year because she was 17 when she died and now it's been 17 years since then, which makes this anniversary exactly her age and her who lifetime she lived life. Having saying that, it is symbolic to you because of that reason plus all the other reasons that are running around in your head.

When loosing that special someone, there comes a strong feeling, that part of our emotional world has changed forever and can never be retrieved or made good, well guess what? Loss is central to our lives. We cannot avoid it and besides, it is often through brokenness and loss that we truly grow into our humanity and develop the compassion that connects us to others.

Voting is just like anything else in life, if you worry about the outcome, you'll get know where. Why vote to give other satisfaction? why not the oposite?

If you want to vote a 1 because you truly feel it was that bad, then with all due respect, vote a 1. Don't vote a 5 just because you want them to return the favor. This is not about favors nor is it about voting.

Like I said above it's like anything else in life, would you do something to get something in return in real life? In most cases No, except if you have a barter system. Everything has a price, or a price you have to pay for your actions sort-to-speak.

This issue can't be solved, and there is a simple reason to that, no matter how much we change, people will always find ways to do what they want. One of my favorite quotes is, "Anything is possible, don't underestimate the impossible." and I think that quote holds true to many things in life.

Well though out the years, many things have change, the economy, the way we are educated if at all, the jobs we have, etc.

When I was a kid, and I'm sure when many others where kids, we didn't the technology that we have now-a-days. We used to have to go outside and play with friends, play sports, and use our imagination which is what this world is lacking now.

Look at kids now-a-days, what do they have? Cell phones, computers, internet, cable tv, etc. Everything is technological now-a-days.

And then I blame the parents. The parents are the ones who give them this technology at an early age and they have access to it anytime they want.

Since when do kids that are 8 or 5 or whatever the age may be watch rated R movies or pg-13 movies with or without an adult? Well now-a-days it happens all the time. I blame the parents and socioty in general for that.

No I've never heard of the famous Indian poet named Tagoer.

I started writting when I was 18, I was a Senior in High School and I thought I was in Love. My girlfriend had left me for someone else, but told me she left me because we would be far away and at different schools. We went to the senior prom and she never danced with me, she danced with another guy the whole time. Anyways, I was heart broken and I just started to write. My feelings where comming out and it felt really great.

And that would have to be who/what influenced me for the most part to write. To be honest I don't know a whole lot about poets, I just know how to write and different styles. The only poet I really know is William Shakespear.

Ricky, it's been a while since I've last seen or talked to you, but in all honesty, no. It is normal to go back to something that you like and visit a site that you use to vist all the time. I find it to be normal, it happens to everyone at some point wheather or not it's on a website or not is not my point, it happens to everyone wheather it be person, place or thing.

No one knows how the world will end, there are many theories on how it will end with scientific explanations why, but like I said before, no one can estimate when or how it will end...it will end when it ends and that's it.

Ricky, plausable questions please. That can not be answered due to the fact that there are so many different religions. Plus the simple fact that there is no documentation as far as I know of about such.

Like I said before plausable questions please. I can't determine wheather or not your threads will be deleted or not if in fact you haven't posted any. Results may differ from thread to thread.

This is a hard topic for many to talk about. As I see it, you will always have that mental scare that they caused you. Having been raped or molested is very hard for one to cope with by it self, let alone the fact that it happened to you by your two uncles. But here is a little advice I have for you:

Stand up for what you believe in, fight for it, don't sit and ponder or sulk, just don't, it makes matters worse. Stand up tall, and tell yourself, I can do this, I can handle it, I am strong, and no one can push me down, because when I get knocked down I get up again...And when I get up again, I am strong and more knowledgeable than before so don't get in my way this time...

Keep a positive mind, and positive things will come from it, keep a negative mind set, and well negative things will produce from it...It's like the old saying, "you hang around a dog, you'll become one" Well you hang around negative thoughts, negative things will happen, and if you hang around positive thoughts, positive things will happen...

Stand up, think strongly about stuff, and be positive in every way, shape or form, and you'll be happy, and nothing can get in your way.

In my eyes, you can get over that fear, anything is possible, don't underestimate the impposible.

THE WAY TO KNOWLEDGE IS
LEARNING.... THE WAY TO LEARNING
IS ASKING....

That is one of my favorite quotes, and I stand by it all the time. I like learning new things and at the same time I like helping others. The only way I can truly comment on this question is this: I've been brought up by very strict but loving parents, and disapline is very high standard in my life. I was in karate for 4 years when I was younger and I feel it sculpted me as an individual in the area of disapline.

I also feel that it is because I hang around more educated people than myself, which in return I become more knowledgable. That's my outlook on this.

Really... How interesting?

Depends on your outlook of your life and how you go about yourself. If you feel you'll never meet someone that's right for you then you never will, simply because you are telling your mind that and you will look for faults in the person that may be right for you. You have to have an open mind and believe anything is possible. What you tell yourself and your mind is usually the outcome of what will happen.

It's like I said above, if you are not confident then that's how you'll act. It's like dogs, they can sense when someone is in fear of them and they take advantage of it. Samething with humans except oposite, the person can sense that you are not confident and that you don't think it will workout, and then they end up leaving. It's all about you and how you feel about yourself and project yourself to others.

Believing is like a dream, anything can come true, you just have to put your mind to it along with your heart and soul. Be kind, be loving, but most of all be yourself.

Befriending your cousin or any family member is not always a wise thing to do. Family is family regardless in my eyes.

Your cousin may have wanted to change how you dressed or how you looked, but perhaps it was in her attention to give you the best and didn't mean anything by it. Maybe it was her way to connect with you. You really should sit and talk with her/him and let her/him know how your truly feel.

And the answer to your question is Yes. Anything is possible you just have to believe, never underestimate the impossible. You should be open to your family, let them know how you feel about things, don't hide your thoughts or emotions with your family. You only have one family and to loss that is like death to your soul and heart.

Nothing is ever to late, anything is possible. Just because you've had surgery doesn't make you a different person, you are still you and you'll always be you. Don't let people fool you to think that, be strong and confident and people will see you differently.

Oh Joe. Will we ever have world peace????

Im joking- You dont have to answer that!

World peace is a very touchy subject for many. I feel as much as people wish we could have world peace, it will never happen. The world is different, it is diverse as many would like to call it. There will always be confilicts between people, states, countries, etc.

World peace in my opinion will never happen. Even if we where all robots I still think there would be conflict, look back to even B.C. there was conflict and fighting, look at the world now, there is just as much and or more going on. Wars being fought, people fighting everyday, political battles, heated debates, look at it all, we are always striving to be better and competitive and that is one of the main reasons their will never be world peace in my opinion.

How can I show somebody I really care about that I've changed in a good way?

Jade: If you fear of being truly loved then you are being foolish. You parents love you even though they might not show it. Your mother gave birth to you, she cared for you, helped you, etc. You don't call that love?

Fear? what is fear? fear is an emotion, just like love. You can't describe it, but you sure can feel it. What you may fear may only be an imagination, fear is a thought, a mear thought, and by keeping your mind in that train of thought you'll always be in fear unless otherwise.

Evanescence: Tell them how you feel, tell them you feel you changed, and that you really care. Prove to them with every chance you get that you changed for the better. If you are going to do something that you used to do, forget and move on and show them you really changed. Showing someone and letting them see with their own two eyes is the only way they will know you've changed for the better.

Don't sell yourself short In life, it is very easy to take a shortcut or the easy road out DON'T DO IT! Give 110% and you will never be disappointed. It may be hard for you to talk to the one you care about, about this subject, but you have to do it.

I know this is the wrongest place in the world to ask this, but is it wrong to be straight edge? ppl are telling me that I am a boring person because I won't have sex, drink, or do drugs. PLEASE HELP!

Joe, do you enjoy the Scorpions?

Joe, what's your view on the meaning of life?

Joe, what's your favorite kind of pie?

Joe, my boyfriend committed suicide after finding out that I cheated on him once. He beat me up pretty badly and I made him a promise that I would never forgive him. He was on drugs, but I did not find this out until after he died. People blame me for his death. I don't feel like it's my fault. He left me a note and it said that he felt badly about what he had done to me. I believe that is the real reason why he committed suicide; not because I cheated, but because he was unhappy with himself for alot of reasons. He was just 21 when he died. Now, my current boyfriend accuses me of still being in love with him. How could I explain to my current boyfriend that he was my "first love" and that I'll never be able to forget him? Also, what do you think I should do about the people in my community? Should I just ignore them like I've been doing? Thank you so much.

XxXbrass monkeyXxX: There is nothing wrong in being straight edge. I know many people my age that are straight edge. Does it make you less of a person? Absolutly NOT, it is the way you chose to life your live, and it's one thing that makes you happy. You are not boring, you have other qualities other than drinking, sex, drugs, etc.

If someone thinks you are boring perhaps they don't know the real you. You are you, and no one can change that. If they don't like you for who you are then, that is their problem and not yours.

Life live to the fullest you'll never know what will happen in the future, for what the future brings is only determined by you and you only. It's about choices in life.

Alex Marlatt: No, I do not enjoy Scorpions, I don't hate them since they are a living thing, but I don't particually love them either.

The meaning of life, that's a big question for one' to ask anyone. My veiw on this subject is simply: we are all here for a reason, whatever that reason is we may never truly know. But I believe and it's only my opinion, that each individual wheather it be male or female, has a definitive purpose which will eventually be executed to the fullest in which we can sucessfully live our lifes.

Favorite pie, well there are many, but my favorite would have to be apple pie.

Kail: Suicide is a touchy subject, even more when it envolves a loved one.

You'll have to sit down and talk with your current boyfriend, and let him know how you truly feel on the subject. Expressing your feelings on this subject will be hard, but it has to be done. Let him know loosing someone is hard enough, but loosing someone to death is twice as hard.

Whatever you do don't ignore anyone about the subject. Yes it is a touchy subject, yes it won't be easy, but whatever you do don't ignore it. The more you ignore this subject, the more people feel you are trying to hide something. Let it all out, let them know your feelings, express yourself for them. By doing that people will understand your feelings and won't look at you thinking you are trying to hide anything about it.

Man your just full of information...

Soso: I am doing fine today, thank you for asking.

I don't fully understand your question about love from one side, perhaps you could re-word that?

If you are asking if love is hopeless, then by all means I'd have to say NO. Love is an emotion/feeling. It is just like anything else in live, never underestimate the impossible, everything is possible. Love is not hopeless, if it was then what would become of love? Nothing in my eyes. Without love, the world would be gone, without love you would not be a live, without love you would not be born, etc.

Well I would do nothing. If someone cares for me, but won't show it, then what good is that for me? Why should I keep telling myself otherwise if they don't show the emotions they truly feel? Although, words are not every thing, a picture can paint a thousand words. Therefore, your actions are stronger than your words most of the time.

Hey Bob, sure that'd be fine, but don't steal all my thunder here...lol I'm just kiding.

Joe... have you ever truly been in love? If so... what happened?

Sherry: I once thought that I was in love, was it true love, by all means no. Here is a little about what happened...

I started writting when I was 18, I was a Senior in High School and I thought I was in Love. We went to the senior prom and she never danced with me, she danced with another guy the whole time. We then got in our limo at the end of the night and she wanted to make-out, I refused I was so mad at her. Then my girlfriend had left me for someone else, but told me she left me because we would be far away and at different schools. I was heart broken and I just started to write. My feelings where comming out and it felt really great.

That was 4 years ago now I believe. She was my first girlfriend, and since then I haven't had any, I've been single and still am single.

Thanks for making me feel better about myself, Joe. You made me open my eyes to newer thing, so I thank you again. I actually reccomended you to a lot of my friends on here because you really are a big help.

It's me again. my b/f is acting like a total jerk. I am so nice to him, and so supportive and out-of-the-blue he questions my love for him. He tells me that I don't love him because I stop pming him on here because I am always off line when he is on line. What should i do. PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!

XxXbrass monkeyXxX: Ok first thing I have to ask, is this a real relationship person to person, or is this an internet relationship?

Second of all, why should that even matter? And why should he even be questioning you on the fact if you love him or not?

Obviously somethings happened besides you not Pm-ing him anymore because you aren't on as much. If this is not the case, then I advise you either PM, email, or call him, and let him know why you haven't been able to do that lately and how you truly care for him.

Consumed in Happiness: Ok first and foremost, I must say you are young, you are a teen parent which is hard in it self. Raising this Kid should be your first and utmost concern.

Relationships come and go. You have your whole life ahead of you to find someone right for you and your daughter.

There is nothing wrong with being friends with this guy, by all means call him, talk to him and be friends. As far as being in a relationship with him, I don't think it would workout, you are young and have a kid, and to tell you the truth it's very rare to see an adult in a long distance relationship because they almost always never work.

Like I said above, your main concern should be how to raise and take care of your daughter. The last thing on your mind should be relationships at this point of time.

Hi Joe, I do have to say, i like these topics that you and Bob have.

So Joe:
If you could go back in time [or not] and have coffee [or any other beverage] with any poet ever who would it be?

ContradictingThoughts: Ok, you are 15 or at least that's what it states in your profile, I assuming this guy is over the age of 18.

First of all if you are having doubts about it, then why wait? Why tell yourself that you have no emotions for someone else that you date, if you actually do?

Second of all you are very young, and usually at that age one' does not truly know what they want in a relationship. You have your whole life to find the right person, that is closer in age to you.

One of my favorite quotes by Dr. Napolean Hill is, "Whatever the mind can conceve and believe the mind can acheive." which I find to be extreamly true in life. If you think that you have no emotion, then you won't, you'll find flaws in the person to say otherwise. But if you think positive and tell yourself he is the one, you'll find reason to believe that.

Overall I say if you are having doubts, plus the fact that he is overage compared to you, I say don't do it.