Obligations.

[This is just a rant]

You know I'm effing [mad] and [frustrated]
My family is soo annoying. and I [DON'T] have an obligation to certain things when it comes to family. For example, I don't have a [flipping] obligation to do my brother's laundry, or my mom's, or my dad's. I know how to do mine and that's all I need to do. But NOO. My dad's too much of an idiot to do [stuff] himself. And my mom's just a [flipping] piece of.. [you know] I hate her so much, I wish she'd just leave me the eff alone. She's always all up in my business. And when I tell her to just leave it alone, she goes and calls my best friend's mom, thinking her mom will know something. My mom's a [flipping] dip----. UGH.

My best friend and her mom; me and my mom. We're not close to each other. Our mom's are like whatever to us, and we don't need them in our lives. [We can survive off each other!] lol.. But seriously, my mom :wasn't: in my life >>when i needed her<< when i was like 6. And I've grown indifferent to the "needs" of a mother. She really wasn't a part of my life for about 14-15 years. And I don't need her to start trying to "bond" with me. Cuz I just.. hate her. Ugh. I hate going to school, but I prefer to go their because I'd rather be at school than at home, where my mom is. And everyday, once school is over, I hate to go home. So I try to find other things to do, just so I don't have to deal with my mom's b.s. And she just got back from a vacation, so she's not going back to work for another couple of days. And I been here with her for the past 5 days. And it's been complete [he--]

I feel like she's suffocating me! UGH. save me.

[golden] ages.

i don't need her to try to make up for whatever she feels guilty for. I don't [need] or [want] her in my life. She just needs to stay [out] of my [flipping] business. Cuz my [stuff] ain't hers. She can make whatever "efforts" she wants, but it doesn't "make up" for anything. She's always been blocked out of my life. And I need her to stop trying to push her way back in, cuz it's [not] happening.

Can we continue this without the flippings please.

Thank You

Sher

"People apologize, but
they're not really sorry, because
if they were, they would've never
done something that was in need of
an apology in the first place."

People make mistakes, some apologize and mean it, some don't. Seems like the real problem is your pent up anger. If you don't like living with her, move out. If you don't like talking to her, don't. One day though you will have to let go of that anger and learn to live or it will eat you alive.

[why] [do] [you] [type] [with] [all] [the] []'s?

And anyways, Just leave?

If you hate living there so much, and doing things for others- Dont.

Do something about your situation.
&& stop complaining..

The things in the brackets are replacement for curse words or emphasizm. But I guess I'm suppose to stop doing that now..

And I can't move out. I don't have any money. And I have no where to go. Trust me, if I was able to move out, I'd be out by now.

And I been through a lot. I mean, everyone has. But there's always just so much a person can take and I'm on the edge. I have to live here, with my parents, for another two years.
-->I just feel like ever since 7th grade, everything's gone downhill, you know. And I've become somewhat of a b----. I feel like I dunno how to handle things anymore. And like I dunno how to take things and sort things out and make it through certain things. I feel like I've stopped trying to be "strong" and just give up when I'm too tired to deal with the stuff.

I use to care so much about like school and my family. My life was never all that great. But as a child, I was content with it. But after this one incident in 7th grade, I realized how much the world sucks. And how in reality, you get no second chances, you don't always get sympathized, most of the world and even the people you're "friends" with don't care about you as much as you think.. 7th grade really messed up my life.. or I let it mess up my life; either way, after that, I became really sorrowful and pessimistic. And I know that there are a lot of people out there who have it worse than me, but there's just so much I can take, and I dunno how much more that is. Because everyday, I feel like I have to deal with these little things with my friends, and it's like.. rawr.

But in any case, I don't have many friends anyway. Cuz I don't find the need to make them. And the ones I've already made, I've distanced myself from them. I always get tired out from these emotions of frustration and anger and sorrow. So instead of dealing with them, I end up making myself feel indifferent. Which I know isn't a good thing because doing that doesn't make my problems go away. I just suppress everything because I'm tired of crying. I just feel like I'm losing control of my emotions.

[sigh] I know this probably sounds really stupid, but it's just the way is it with me..

"I realized how much the world sucks. And how in reality, you get no second chances, you don't always get sympathized, most of the world and even the people you're "friends" with don't care about you as much as you think.."

I guess that depends on if they are friends or "friends" because real friends probably care about us more than we usually give them credit for.

Honestly if you are that unhappy, get a job and start saving to get out, you're 16. Life sucks sometimes, but all you can do is do the best with what you have, obviously you have found no closure with this thing that happened in 7th grade, get down to the nitty gritty, the only one who can fix you is you. Other people will hurt us in life, it is inevitable, it is what we do with that pain, hurt and anger, that determines what direction our lives head.