Feeling lost again

Been a while sense iv post here, was having issues with depression and suicidal thoughts..but my gf managed to pull me from it all..

but now even though i was doing better and the dr's finnaly diagnosed me and im taking there meds and doing the therapy im still beginning to feel lost again..

the sight of my parents is making me angry again and fighting with them drives me near the the point of cutting or suicide..

how do you guys manage to shut your parents and people out of your head..can this even be done?

Ummm... my past has been a little hard, and thear comes a point, where you just dont care anymore. thats how im fealing right now, you dont want to feel this. nothing worth crying about, or nothing worth worring about. its a horrable fealing.... like,... why live?
but you obviostly havnt hit this stage yet. so just hang in thear, and dont let people get the best of you. dont argue with your parrents, its not worth the stress. just chill and go along with whatever life brings.
and i herd anti depressants dont always work, and sometimes make you worse. so watch out for that.

The problem is iv already had that feeling like whats the point...they put me in a mental hospital for that..and if i hadnt had my gf through it all i wouldnt be here..

and its slightly hard to not fight with my parents..they keep taking stuff like my internet which is about the only way i can talk to my gf..

Umm, I'm not sure I even know what im talking about here. But my parents monitor everything i do and the thought of them finding something of mine or looking deeper into my life scares the hell outta me because i know that everything will start a fight. Whenever i fight with them i just want to leave it was during a time where all we ever did was fight that i decided im moving to china to be with my biological mom.

About the anti-depressants sometimes all they ever do is drive people crazy and they make people stop everything, theres nothing worth talking about, nothing worth thinking about, so they stop. These pills are also well'known for changing personalities.

For the stuff with your gf, i dont know how to fix that one. It's crazy that they would take away all your internet and you have no other way to contact her? ?

I've been diagnosed with depression since i was 6. Yes, 6. As a lil girl i spent almost every afternoon with my pschyiatrist, and thats hard to live with, and ill never let it go.

Sorry if i couldnt help.
-Kaitlyn

Its just me to be stupid enough to try to be better..and stupid of my to have made her my gf..now i lose a love and the only thing keeping me alive...

Stupid of you ? Not quite hun, if thts stupid then everything i do is retarded. What happened?

Said stupid things and keep hurting her no matter what i do to stop..and if i lose her and it seems i will im not sure what i will do..

and its stupid of me because i knew that the chances of me being better is like not even on a scale..and i know that even when its been so good that my thoughts are still running and i know i dont think ill get much further

Oh, i know how that is, when all of a sudden you dont want to start letting people love you because you dont want to hurt them and then it seems everything went wrong?

Everyone can be better, and its kinda up to how abd you want it. You cant "know" something that hasnt happened unless of course your psychic.... ?

Your parents, are your parents. They can only effect your life to a point, after that, you've moved out and if you want to you don't have to talk to them any longer, they can no longer argue with you, no longer try to influence your actions etc.

If you persist, you can reach that point. Even now they can probably only get at you to a certain point, and past that you control it.

If what they argue is not what you agree with, if its harmful to you, know that and then while alone deny it if that's the best thing you can do. If you know it's not true, if it's just them getting down on you, remind yourself of how wrong they are so it won't bother you as much, and remember how pointless their argument is because it's wrong.

This is your life, and what others say doesn't always have to be true. Opinions can be wrong. If there not allowing you to do things, try to see if they're trying to help you by doing so. Even if they aren't helping you, try to see if that's what they're trying to do....

If your girlfriend loves you, she'll likely deal with some moodiness. If you apologies when you should, and show her that you care about her, obviously TRY to be there for her, she should be fine.

Try your best, and if you mess up, apologies (meaningfully). If she knows you're making an effort, that means a lot.

You sound like a good person to me. I hope things work out for you, and the sooner the better :).

I know exactly how you feel
I usually draw, write, play drums, listen to music that I can relate to or run.
It also helps a lot to talk to people you trust bout how you feel.
I know this might sound weird but write notes about how you feel
and then go and burn them...
It takes a lot of stress out

It is not a strange thing for me too because i feel maybe all the time. i always feel that no one understands me or i do understand others. i am totaly lost