A Love Separated By Distance

In September, I met this guy named Tyler. We were attracted to each other and started dating. I honestly had never been so happy in my life. We did everything together and was inseparable. If you had seen the movie "The Notebook", we were a lot like those two. We just didn't argue near as much.

I always knew he was going to leave me. He told me when we first started talking that he would have to move back to Las Vegas. But I didn't care. I still wanted to be with him.

December came and he had turned in all of his books at school. It was his last day. I didn't know it was going to be the last time I ever saw him though. After school we also did the usual. Talking on the phone for hours on end.

One day he suddenly left. He called me up and told me his mom just let him know that he was catching a bus for Vegas in the morning. We wouldn't even be able to see each other again. I cried, he cried, we were both devastated. We didn't talk for a few days after that. When I finally got ahold of him, we talked but then he had to go so he said he loved me then we hung up.

I never heard from him again. I tried calling him but his phone was useless. He had to put his own money on it and there was nothing on it now. I waited so long to hear from him but I never did. After a month I decided to try dating someone else. And I did. I thought I was happy but I really wasn't. I ended up reading a poem one day that reminded me of Tyler. I cried a lot.

Then I heard from my cousin that Tyler was asking him about me on myspace. If I was alright. Next he found me on facebook. He had searched for me and I was his only friend. We started messaging each other. He asked me to get on msn and now we've been talking there for hours every single night.

He is still the same, but in some ways, different. He used to be straightforward with me about his feelings but now it feels as though he pulls away every time we get into a serious conversation. I said I would be happy for him if he found another girl, but he said that he wanted me. I asked if he could handle the distance, he said he didn't know. He told me he cares about me a lot and that I was still as beautiful as ever. I finally told him that he was confusing me. He told me that I could ask him anything. So I asked how he felt about me now. He said he still loved me, with all of his heart and always will, but it just gets harder to do so the longer we're apart. Which is understandable. He said he wanted to be with me, no matter where it is, but we wouldn't be able to see each other for probably about another 2 years. He lives in Arizona. The only person he could stay with here is his uncle, but he's moving and his girlfriend is having twins. So he would have no where to stay here.

So I know he wants to be with me, he seems to be afraid of being separated from me though. I wanna be with him so badly, I think we could make it work, but I just don't know what he wants. He's so confusing and I don't wanna ask. I just don't know what to do. What to say to him.

Any advice? Sorry this is so long.

If you love each other maybe you should just wait for him, and he could do the same? because if its true love then itll last that two years, like the notebook =)
just ask him what he wants to do and if he can wait for you, thats the only advice i can give you...

Thank you, hun.
And I know.. I'm more than willing to, but I just don't know about him. I can't figure out what he wants anymore.

I really do think something amazing can come out of all of this though. We didn't talk to each other for 6-7 months, and are still crazy about one another. I just think he's afraid of being with me right now because he's never been in a long distance relationship before.

You've got to trust him. And let him know that you're willing to wait.

I know, hun.
I do trust him..
I'm just afraid he may think differently than I do.
And not want to be in a relationship again with me.
But alright, the next time I talk to him, I'll try to pull him into a serious conversation again and tell him that I AM willing to wait.

Sweetheart, I know how hard it is to be in something so good and have so many obstacles. But you have to see that deep down, you know you should let it go. You care about him a lot, but if you both are that crazy about each other, if it's really that meant to be, then when the time is up, you'll still care for each other. Continue talking, as close friends. That's what a lover always has to be first. Then when you can finally be together, you'll be repaid for your hardships.

You are right..
And it sucks because my heart just won't let me. I don't know what it is about him. When we didn't talk for 7 months, I finally thought I was getting over him. Then I read one poem and realize I was far from it. Talking to him isn't helping either, but I don't wanna stop.

I'll keep talking to him. Just tell him one last time how I feel, ask him what he wants, and see what happens from there. I don't want to lose him a second time.

Thank you all =)
This really meant a lot to me.
I know, I'll talk to Tyler about everything. I am willing to wait, but I won't wait longer than necessary.

I know what it's like to finally think you're over someone and then be reminded of them.

I was dating this really amazing guy, and he ended up having sex with another girl. He ended up saying 'Come on, did you really think you and I would last?' So I told myself he was a bad guy, and I thought I got over him. Then it was so much as listening to 'The Beatles' that made me upset that I lost him worse than when I initially did.

Wow... what a jerk.
You definitely don't derserve that. No wonder you feel horrible. It's totally understandable. I say stab em with a spork and make yourself feel better =)

Crap.... quick update.
Tyler came on msn just a little while ago. I knew by his responses that he was upset. I still know him so well...

But anyways, I asked what was wrong, and he told me that he was getting kicked out of his house. He has been arguing with his mom and step dad a lot. I asked if he was going back to Las Vegas to live with his brother, but he told me that he was more than likely going to have to move to Minnosota with his dad. Who he hasn't even spoken to since he was 5... he was so upset. I feel so awful for him.

I asked if we would lose contact again, and he said probably for awhile... we barely said anything else before I guess he got too upset, told me he was going, and logged out.

I dunno what to do.

Is minnesota any closer to where you live?

I believe so, because he was in Arizona. I'm here in Arkansas.

And I know, I'm only 15. Actually... 16 in 13 days. But anyways. He would move back here if he could, but he has no way of doing so. I've already posted that. The only person he could stay with here is his uncle that is also going to move soon.

Don't worry about it, sweetie.
I'm sure we'll be okay in the end =) I have a lot of faith in myself and Tyler. We actually talked on the phone the other day. He was the one that asked if it was alright to talk for awhile.

He told me that he would be patient for love in real life until he's able to see me again. Because in the end, it would all be worth it. He took the words right out of my mouth.

I'm going to continue talking to him. We'll try to figure someway of him at least coming down to visit me. But until then, I can survive on talking to him through the computer and phone.