o_x Confused o_0

*Sigh* Of course, this may not be the exactly most appropriate place to post but this has to do with a lot more than depression, suicide attempts, cutting, and thing along those lines. Lol. I'm sort of getting over my cutting at the moment, though I /was/ asked a peculiar question today by my Best Friend. o_0

Danny, I love him and all and he says he loves me. I've dated him before, of course, but the last time he left me for his ex, whom he states is the only other person he has ever loved like me, even though I honestly told him he was making a mistake. She was going to do her usual routine to him, and of course I was right.

When she dumped him I was there. We were together all night {that does sound slightly bad}, but yes, we did end up having sex. Not like all night or anything. Not even close.

Well he has another girlfriend now. He told me he was afraid to ask me out because of what he did to me about Jenna, the last time me and him dated.

I love him with all my heart, I'm just so lost and confused on how to handle all that is going on with him. He tells me he loves me and misses me constantly, and everything you'd want the person you absoloutely love with all your heart to tell you every day, but occasionally I wonder whether he means it or not.

I used to not believe him, but now he makes sure to remind me every day. And now I know {or at least I think I know o_0} that he loves me, but then again I'm not sure.

Jenna; he wanted to change for her, and I'm afraid to ask him to change for me. I'm afraid I'll lose him. I mean no matter what he says or does, I know {and I'm sure he knows} that he'll never lose me. It's been two years {nearly} and sometimes things get really hectic, sometimes me and him barely keep in contact, and sometimes things are how /we/ want them to be. We love being together, and every chance we have we are together. He is my best friend, and the love of my life.

Most of you, right now, might be thinking this is just an infatuation, but that's okay. To be honest, I really don't care. I know, and everyone around me knows, just how much I love him. I would /honestly/ die for him. He has saved me from so much, yet I still have something going on that I can't quite figure out.

He stopped me from {well he made me stop} cutting, and many of the times they were over him. {Of course there was my Mom, school drama, and such all worked into that} He knew it too, though I've never been able to admit it to him or myself outloud yet. And when I discussed me cutting over him, he gets all down and feels bad. I can't make him feel like that!! I'll hurt a billion times more than him, if I hurt him.

He knows how easy it is for him to hurt me, and maybe that is why he is so careful 'with me' {sounds like I'm talking about a porcelain doll}. There are those times where I am not sure though.

So any opinion of what I should do? They'd be /really/ helpful!

{Sorry I had to go. Now it's finished!}

{PS: Oh and that odd question I was asked by my best friend; well we were at her house and she was taking an interest in my scars from cuts. o_0 She has a pair of scissors in her hand, and all of the sudden she goes, "Can I cut you?" My jaw nearly dropped! I was on the phone with Daniel and he got so pissed at her. Anyways, I thought since I mentioned it, I might as well fill you in.}

you and me both faithful x3

THere isn't a question..

Now it is finished. Sorry about that.

Always,
Manda

You had sex at 13........nice to know.....

Ok so you know. That wasn't the question. Fuck your opinion. -,-

Always,
Manda

Yeah fuck my opinion.........even though I didnt say anything except most people dont want to know about you having sex.....Yeah fuck me.....Im just a twisted bitch...I dont matter....Yeah fuck me....