Jealousy

My boyfriend Jesse and I have been dating for two months now and things have been going great. At least, thats what I thought. yesterday he randomly sprung the fact that my best friend is a guy on me. My bestfriend Mike and I have been friends for years and I wouldn't trade him for the world. but I really love Jesse and I don't wanna lose him either. I don't really think it's that he's jealous of mike, I think he's more along the lines of worried that mike and i are gonna mess around behind his back. And it made me really upset that he doesn't trust me. I don't know how to convince Jesse that I would never cheat on him. And I don't know how to tell mike that he might have to cool down with kissing me on the cheek around Jesse(even though mike and i have done that for years. I'm just really frustrated and idk wat to do

If he is really your best friend he wouldnt take much offence if you just asked him to stop the cheek kissing just tell him something like 'Jesse is getting the idea we might do something behind his back so for awhile would it be alright if we didnt do anything that would cause him to think that?'

hope this helped

I did talk to Mike about it and he says he can lay off the cheek kissing and stuff. He also said if it gets to the point where Jesse is constantly questioning my faithfulness to him, then it's not worth it. And i do agree with him. Thanks for all the help

Now that I think about it your right. It isn't fair to my boyfriend to let mike do that. And I too would question if it were reversed. Thanks for pointing that out to me. I'll confront mike about it later today and tell him that he has to respect my relationship with Jesse. thanks again

Usually people get jealous because of their own insecurities or guilt. Maybe ur boyfriend is just insecure but whatever it is you can't build a good lasting relationship without trust.

MY opinion. If my boyfriend had some girl that he was good friends with and they always did the kissing on the cheek and did it after we were going out too. I would hate it. I would say something, because he's in a relationship with me. I don't care if the kiss didn't mean anything, its just the principle of the matter. Its not right.

I agree, not right. its not that you're asking him to change just because he doesn't like it....you should be asking him because its just disrespectful to the relationship....that'd make anyone jealous!

Every1 has put forward valid points so thers not much to add to the matter.

the only thing i could suggest is to make it clear to mike that u dont think about him 'that way' (if its true) and kindly as him to be a lil less affectionate, at least around Jesse (like you did). also ask mike to be more trusting to u because thats hurtful.

on the other hand if u feel u might have or develop feelings for mike then mayb u should re-think ur situation a lil bit.

p.s.
about wht that one guy said, i agree with you; however this is not always the case. for example if you where moving towards a relationship with some1 but then started going out with some1 else, ur manner towards the first friend should change because unless ur thinking of cheating ur intensions may lead u astray.

Like most people have said...my fiance is Spanish and their a very affectionate people, hugging I can deal with since I hug all my guy friends but kissing his cheek or any other part of him...I see red and its just completely not ok and I know that he'd have a right to be mad and wonder what was up if I allowed that to happen as well between me and my guy friends. Amanda's said everything there is to say really. A rule that I live by when it comes to a relationship you want to last, think about things before you do them and if you'd want your boy/girlfriend doing the same thing. Trust is one of the most important things in a relationship, without it then there really isn't a relationship at all but in order to have trust you must earn it and that comes with setting boundaries and showing respect for each other. Allowing that to happen is like a slap in your boyfriends face and I'd definitely be thinking something was up if I were him.