Supposedly Best Friends?

Okay, as all these start out, there's this one guy. Let's call him Ian. Last year we were together for quite a while, and I broke up with him because we're still young I was thirteen at the time, about to turn fourteen, and I saw us lasting for far longer than I wanted because I didnt want to end up with Ian for so long that I barely had any chance on the 'dating scene' when I was older. We were still the best of friends afterwards and he helped me through a lot of times including some friends pressuring me to give them money to do drugs, divroce of my parents, my nana getting abused. A lot of things happened and he helped me through it all, hell, he doesn't even know that he helped me through it. He still doesnt know. But yes, we tried again this year to get together but once again it didn't work out. Since then our friendship has spiralled downhill, it's not been about a month since I've even had a small conversation with him, even longer since one of our deep long conversations which could goon till about one am in the morning. I want to tell him that it's killing me losing him, I will always love him in a way, just not the way he wanted me too. He's my best friend and I just can't let go of him, I want to tell him everything that he actually helped me through but the thing is is that I'm worried that he'll just turn around and not care, because I genuinely think that he doesn't give a d*mn anymore. I dont know what to do.

If hes your best friend then of course he cares about you. Sometimes friends need to be reminded that they're needed and appreciated. Tell him how hes been there and helped you so many times...that might be the glue that holds up the friendship.

Perhaps he can't be your friend anymore because it's killing him how much he wants to be with you.
It sounds kind of like your using him for your advantages and having him as your friend. The relationship sounds like it's only on your terms and it seems like he may be withdrawing from you because he can't stand to be thrown aside when you decide you don't want to be with him anymore.

Wow. this sounds like a situation that i was in with my best friend anders. he was always there for me through everything!! even after he dated for a little while the first time in the seventh grade we were still the best of friends. he could probably write a better story of my life than i could. he knows me like the back of his hand. then right before i got with my current boyfriend we tried things again. it just didnt work. now its difficult for him to even be able to talk to me because as in your case, i don't love him the way that he wants me to love him.
You have to be understanding of his feelings. it is killing him on the inside to be close to you because he cares for you in ways that he knows you will never care for him and it hurts. then on the other side its hurting him to not talk to you because if yall were as close as you say he doesn't want to let go of that. he is stuck between a rock and a hard place. give him some time to get his thoughts straight. he will come around. just let him know that no matter what happens you will be there for him. when things are easier for him he will be there, probably never the same as before though.

I don't find her selfish or a user, though I can see how you'd come to that conclusion. It needs to be realized though that HE chose to be her friend, she didn't force him. Getting together a second time was a downfall on both of them. Especially if one of them knew it wouldn't work out. The way it looks he wanted it to work out so bad he'd give up the friendship for it.

As of now, right now you need to figure out what you want instead of hurting him again. You can keep changing your mind. If you want to be friends and friends is all you want, let him know that. If he chooses to be your friend then good. If you want to be more than friends and that's all you want, and you're not going to worry about the dating scene, then you need to let him know that too. If he chooses the same thing then good, if not then that's a good thing too. You can't just go at him and talk about your emotions without knowing what they are. So, I suggest taking the rest of this week to figure them out. Sometimes it takes more than an hour or two, even a day or two. Leave him be in the process and let him think things over as well. It will make the talking go a lot more smoother and a lot less dramatic, I'm sure.

He's too adorable to resist! :)