Fighting..

Well, I know perfectly well that every couple has some arguments from time to time, but lately I've noticed me and my boyfriend argue quite a lot. What I am wondering is what can I do to help stop the arguing...

Usually it is about really stupid things, such as if they get my order wrong at a fast food place i dont tell them so they can fix it, I just deal with it. Apparently that bothers him...

I don't want all these silly arguments to break us apart because when we aren't arguing everything is perfect..it's all I could ask for.

Also, he doesn't seem to understand that I get emotional easily. If you've been on p+q for a while and are familiar with me, then you know i've had a LOT of ups and downs in life. And last summer finally got over my long fight with depression. Lately there have been many stressful situations in my life which are causing me to go back to being depressed...and i know that makes me hard to get along with.

I guess all i'm asking is what should i do? I try talking to him, but sometimes i just don't know how to bring it up...

That sometimes happens when a couple is constantly
around each other, they just get so pissed, not all but
i know it happens to some.

I don't know really to say if it isn't, try taking a walk
with him and communicate like britt said.

Every couple is different.

I wish you both luck :)

^^ Communication, communication, communication. It is key.

Just continue to try to talk to him. That is all and about the best you can do.

Try not to let the conversation turn into an argument. Be careful of what you say; the words you use & how you use them, you don't want to provoke him. If he says something that angers you, don't let it provoke you; just shrug it off & stay focused on your goal. Your goal, of which is to talk.

Of course this could be easier said then done some people may say, but it is truely that simple. You just have to stay focused, be committed & patient.

:)

I absolutely agree..i try to communicate. but i always get so emotional and start crying lately. and thats annoying to him too..lol....how do you keep your emotions down so you can have a conversation? i need help with that too...=p

Yeah, i know i need to talk to him about that. usually we have amazing communication, its just lately we havent. i'm sure theres something much larger under it all...could it by any chance be that he is nervous? because you see in a couple days shy of 3 months he's moving into my house and then we're going to go to college together. i know you guys aren't him and therefore dont know what he's feeling, but do you think that could be a worry?

This is always frustrating and rough, my boyfriend and I go through times like this :P There is a good chance that something else could be bothering him, when we're upset about something then we tend to get mad and blow up about the silly little things a lot. And what you said about nerves over moving in together and all that is quite possible too. Juan and I are getting ready to move in together and I know that I'm nervous, just because its a huge step and its making me a bit touchy sometimes. Sadly though communication is the only answer. Try talking to him about the arguments and see if there's anything bothering him.

And about getting really emotional...yeah that can be a tough one :P Women seem to be especially wired to be like that lol Have you tried discussing with him that you don't mean to be so emotional and that you need his help and support on that topic? Being emotional isn't a bad thing but it can unsettle guys easily lol

If you get so emotional when you try to talk to him, then why don't you write him a letter telling him exactly how your feeling and what's bothering you and what the problem is, etc. Don't leave anything out. Then have him read it, and respond back with his own letter.

With me, I'm more open with myself and feelings if I write it down. It helps me sift through all the emotions and get them all out in a healthy way, and also express how I'm feeling to others when needed.

A lot of the time, when I have something to say to someone, but can't find the words to verbally say to them, I use this and I can always get out what I want said. (:

"could it by any chance be that he is nervous? because you see in a couple days shy of 3 months he's moving into my house..."

^ Yes, he could be. That's natural. I know when my boyfriend and I first moved in together that he was nervous because he, "...didn't want to screw things up." (so he said, haha). Perhaps you're boyfriend is worried that you'll only fight more.

"and thats annoying to him too..lol....how do you keep your emotions down so you can have a conversation?"

^ Well, I think your boyfriend should be more understanding, but that's a different story... If you want to keep your emotions down enough to actually talk it's just going to take practice; focus, commitment & patience.

I agree with the suggestion to write down how you feel, since you're having trouble putting things into words without getting emotional; whether you write it down to give to him to read OR write it down for yourself as preparation for what you want to say. I think it'd be best to talk with him verbally about it, but there's nothing wrong with scribbling it down either.

All in all, just tell him what's been on your mind & ask him what's been on his. Together, try to come to a solution.