I'm just curious what your opinions are...

Hey there. Ok, I'm in a serious long term relationship as well as it being long distance right now, we've been together for almost 1 and 1/2 years and we were best friends before that, I absolutely love this man and can't see my life without him but I can't help thinking about this question. My question is, how long do you think is to long to wait for the man you love? I know what I have to do and although its not easy and hurts more then I can express I know waiting for him is the right thing but I've been waiting for a year for him to come home *he's working in a different country right now* and things always happen right before he does so he ends up staying. It's driving me insane and he won't let me come there because the country he's in is unstable and he says its to dangerous for me, he's trying to take care of me and protect me, my head knows that, but thats hard to see somedays. So my question is how long is to long to wait for a man in your guys opinions? He was going to be home in 3 weeks but that might get moved AGAIN so thats why I'm wondering.

"how long is to long to wait for a man in your guys opinions?"

Depends on why I'm waiting and what I'm waiting for. You should have known going in what it was going to be like, so the real question is, how strong is your love? And how much does he really mean to you? Sure it's hard, that just gives you a chance to use your creative energy.

Thank you for your reply. Yes I knew it was going to be hard when I went into it, just I didn't know how hard or how much it can hurt. It wasn't so bad in the start just it's getting harder and more painful the longer the time I guess. Life has already tested how much we love each other, I know our love is strong enough to stand it since it gets strong the more it hurts and he means the world to me but I don't know if I'm strong enough anymore even if our love is I guess.

"I don't know if I'm strong enough anymore even if our love is"

You are your love. If you're not strong enough, neither is it.

Thank you Amanda, I always value and appreciate hearing your opinions on things.

Grated, yes its a online relationship. We've been together for quite some time like I said though and I'm more than confident that he's who he says he is and all that. He's had good reasons for every time he's not been able to make it and there has been one or two times when I had to tell him not to come because he had a choice to make and he was making the wrong one but it does still bug me that the plans have had to change so many times. *sighs* Well the fact that he doesn't want me to come to him honestly hurts a lot and frustrates the living daylights out of me to put it very lightly, thats about the only thing we actually ever argue about is him refusing to let me come because he couldn't make it again. Both the country and the city he's in right now are both very unstable and dangerous so I get that he wants to protect me, he's been hurt quite a few times just in the time we've been dating since it's more or less a war zone right now so I do understand his feelings on it but I'd still rather be there. I don't like having to sit on the side lines.

We've made it with the distance for almost a year and a half, I never wanted to be in a distance type relationship because I know I do better with someone who I can have physical contact with but...*shrugs* he's not here and I wanted, and still want, to be with him so I'm trying to cope with the distance. I'm expecting a lot both from him and this relationship and I'm willing to risk whatever I have to for it to work just...the pain can be overwhelming and crippling sometimes.

Yes, in most ways I'm ready to settle down, I'm still young so sometimes I wonder but I'm sure of this course even if I have little twinges of fear sometimes. I'm almost to that point, I know he'd be really mad if I did and freak out and I'm afraid it would worry and stress him more if I did but it these plans fall through again then I'm ready to just do it anyway and make him deal with it, I've dealt with it and been understanding and patience enough I think. I guess I'm just feeling hurt, scared, tired and lost at the moment and like I'm losing my strength and fight. Only thing I am sure of is that I want this to work and I want to be with him.

*smiles a bit* Thank you all of you for your help, I appreciate it very much. He has sent me the links to the website for where he works and I've seen some videos but yeah, I'll admit that sometimes the lack of information that he gives me drives me insane since I've been going on faith for so long :P