What is cheating?

Hey guys just wanna get different opinions on what people think about cheating before committing to a relationship? is it cheating or exploring other opportunities?

my personal thought is that once you are officially in a relationship (so you both agree on it) thats when everything you do affects the other person.

but what i would really like to know is...the phase where you are just getting to know the person and only been out on few dates and only starting to be intimate with that person yet there has not been any discussion on being a couple does being intimate with someone else at the same time is considered cheating?

let me know what you think guys!

Mmh.. what is 'cheating' kind of depends for each. (everyone has their limit)

well i think.. when you 'cheat' (see someone else) it's that you don't really have (strong) feelings for the other. And if there is no sort of discussion, (sometimes you don't need to have one, to know it's serious) well, why not? Every person you go out with, does not need to be a life long commitment.
As long as you stay honest, i don't see the problem. Just don't hurt the other, or promise anything.
Well.. that's what i think ^^

I'd ask the person you're seeing. Just to make sure you don't 'cheat' on him when you didn't think you were. That's my thoughts.

Of course, everyones opinions are different...

If you are not in an official relationship with the person and you decided to go out on another date with someone else or get "intimate" with someone then that doesn't make it cheating or you a cheater... It only makes you something else just as bad... That is as far as I'm concerned.

- It only makes you something else just as bad... - what does that mean..?

"It only makes you something else just as bad... That is as far as I'm concerned."

I have to agree to a point, let's face it, if you are interested in someone and they are interested in you and they find out you are fooling around with Tom, Dick & Harry, chances are you're not going very far in any relationship. Hopefully you are smart enough to make these "intimate" moments, safe ones, so even if you damage your rep, your health is still intact.

The only way to find out someone else's expectations is to ask them directly.

^ Exactly where I was getting at.

If there's someone you like who likewise likes you, but you don't take the relationship further and continue to just go out or be "intimate" with other people instead, what are they going to think of you? If you ever do take the relationship further how will they know you won't continue with that behavior while in the relationship with them?

What will you think of yourself?

"The only way to find out someone else's expectations is to ask them directly."

^ It's as simple as that.

If there is a mutual interest between two people, but one decides to test the water with someone else, then it's a little like leading someone on, no?

^ Again, thank you, lol.

I've been there before. When I was younger, a "friend" introduced me to this boy. We talked, laughed and just hung out. We'd meet up the next day, and the next day after that, and do it all over again. Then, we had our first kiss. As the weeks passed we spent more time together, even made out once and he told me he "loved" me (he expected me to say it in return but I told him that I couldn't return that because it'd only been a month and I didn't have that strong of feelings yet, he understood... all too well, meaning he knew I wasn't going to sleep with him). I then found out he was seeing that "friend" that introduced us and had been "intimate" with her. When I asked him about it he told me, "It's not like we're dating. I didn't ask you." I replied, "Well, if we're not dating I guess I don't need to tell you I'm walking away." He later tried to apologize, but I wasn't buying into that; I wasn't going to be lead on again.

- When I asked him about it he told me, "It's not like we're dating. I didn't ask you." I replied, "Well, if we're not dating I guess I don't need to tell you I'm walking away." He later tried to apologize, but I wasn't buying into that; I wasn't going to be lead on again. -

waaait a minute! i never said that was ok. He just plain fooled you, and there is no reason to apologize to that.
i'm saying at a certain age, you're not looking for a "serious" relationship. As long as you stay honest with the person, and you don't promise him anything, you don't try to fool with him, you don't say things you don't feel. Then where's the problem?

-Hopefully you are smart enough to make these "intimate" moments, safe ones, so even if you damage your rep, your health is still intact.-

You don't have to get thaaat imtimate with every person you go out with. And if.. it's serveral, it can still be safe. And who says you have a baad image, for having a bit fun at a certain age.
Once you meet someone , who you do want something serious, then everything changes. But before that, why commit yourself, and promise yourself to that person.. (to who you have no feeling..) ?

Cheating is pretty simple.

if you don't want your bf/gf to do it, then you shouldn't either. :)

^ EXACTLY!!!!!!

What I consider cheating...

Kissing another person of the opposite sex on the lips, going around with them behind your back, lying to you and saying they're somewhere else when they're really with that person, going on anything with them that could be considered a date, having sex or "messing with" someone else, promising someone else they are gonna break up with you to be with them, and if they have feelings for another person, they let that person know.

Like... when I was with my ex, we were having some relationship issues. We were 6 months into our relationship. Then one night while I was at work, he told me he was on the phone with his cousin cause his cousin's dad had just died. So I was like okay, whatever. & went to bed because he was up late still saying he was on the phone. I found out he had actually called up his ex while I was at work and told her things like that he missed her and thought about her every single day since they broke up, that he was gonna break up with me to go back to her, etc. Obviously when I found out about it I broke up with him. So him and her started dating again. & when that happened, he wouldn't leave ME alone. Telling me he really didn't mean it, wanted me back, hated life without me, wanted to kill himself, etc... then at school he would totally ignore her existance and walk me to my classes and kissed me infront of all her friends. The next day she broke up with him also.

^ That right there is an example of straight up cheating.

"waaait a minute! i never said that was ok. He just plain fooled you, and there is no reason to apologize to that. i'm saying at a certain age, you're not looking for a "serious" relationship. As long as you stay honest with the person, and you don't promise him anything, you don't try to fool with him, you don't say things you don't feel. Then where's the problem?"

^ What I said was not directed towards you or anything that you'd said. I shared my story, in response to what "Fluffy" said above me. Don't take it to heart.

And, umm, yeah he did fool me; he made me think that we were in a relationship, which was my point to my story. And what's this about "apology"? I didn't ask for one nor expect one, he did so all on his own.

Well I think that cheating is only seriously bad if you are actually in a relationship. But for me, if I was dating someone...like just seeing them. And then he kissed me and such. I would consider us.. somewhat together. And if he just decided to see some other girl, not gunna lie, I would be hurt. And I would be ticked off.

Like people have said above me, I don't think you have to "officially" have a discussion about it to become a couple. It just sort of happens sometimes lol And yeah, if you're emotionally attached to someone and you know their attached to you then why fool around with anyone else? Kinda makes them not view you as someone they'd want to date. As for what is cheating...yeah, everyone has their own ideas of what is cheating and not. My boyfriend and I made a rule very early in our relationship that has saved us a lot of heartache, we apply it not only to our dealings with the other sex but with every aspect of the relationship. If I wouldn't be comfortable with him doing it or it would hurt me or make me mad if he did something then I shouldn't do it myself.