Today Feeling

I feel like nobody cares. And like its my job to act happy and be the crazy friend. But i'm falling apart inside.

Feeling lost. He took everything I had and moved on to the next girl.... And now I'm alone.

Im not really feeling much right now, maybe a bit tired....as its 4.54am lol

I feel terrible. I'm so sick of everything. Its like I try to be happy but its a lie for everyone else.

I'm sick of loving, sick of caring.

I'm done.

I give up. I fuck up everything anyways.

I'm feeling pretty good today.
I'm very cheery.

When i read this forums it makes me examine my life and makes me angry that i can actually relate to how pathetic most people are. no offense. i'm pathetic as well. we're all always complaining. complaining about really horrible things or complaining about our waste line or traffic or how theres nothing on tv. you know from massive things to nothingness we all complain and pity ourselves constantly. i think if all just made an effort to not talk about negative shit or made an effort to not pity ourself or made an effort to not complain...then i think the world would be a lot more positive. one thing that bothers me is my weight. when i complain it reinforces how i really dont like myself. but if i just say "no dont think like that" it will not stop the thoughts but its a start and to those of you thining "i just can;t do that though" well obviously you cant if you dont try. trust me i've had years of therapy and i can realize that its hard to just not pity yourself or just not criticize yourself...but...too all those other emotional kids out there...to all the cutters and bulimics and drug addicts....you are the only one keeping yourself sick. you can choose to change. and if you situations suck...then leave....call a therapist...take charge and find a way to love yourself....nothing helps me more than feeling like i'm pathetic. if i think i'm acting pathetic it embarrasses me and i want to change. soo....your all pathetic...you all spend too much time thinking your life sucks...so sucky emotional wrecks...please go prove me wrong!
much love

Today is really not day :-(

I feel like giving up.
I'm sick of living a lie.

Lost
just want to get closer to god..