Forums on track. Yes or No..???

The following is my opinion only

Ok enough of the blame game who said what, who did this, who deleted that on and on and on....

At the end of the day we can let the forums die or have a crack at fixing them! its not a contest of wills between some members and the mods! I just want the forums to be a fun place to come and chat and discuss topics with other members without fear of being suspended, posts or threads being locked or deleted because it offends a mods sensibilities or whatever

As for the rules yes we need rules but minimum please, I mean who gives a dam if a poem is posted in a forum to emphasis a point....do we need be that pedantic?? if members post in the forums it should be encouraged not stifled, and that's what's been happening, and if it doesn't stop members won't post period, less and less new members are joining, fewer poems submitted, less members on line, look at the poem forums, many go days with out a post being added, what more proof do we need that something must change, and that change must come form the way the forums are moderated, and you Mods must act in unison because to me it doesn't appear that you do.

I could rabbit on about this and that but the crux is, if things don't change the forums will be a place for birthday wishes and announcements and little else

I just hate watching what was such a vibrant healthy site dieing a slow death and be powerless to stop it.....

The balls in your court (mods) forget the recriminations (both sides) what's it going to be???

Bob I don't think its just a few, its across the boards on all forums...... but look, as I said whats happening is fact, we all know that, the forums are dieing the site is not active.

Only you guys can change that, you have to loosen your grip on the forums.....yes I can modify and sanitise my posts in the hope they wont be deleted or locked, but I become a shadow of myself.... if you can't be yourself on the forums whats the point, therefore I won't post end of story and I'm obviously not alone.

We could go back and forth with this but this is not about me or you. Abby has been the catalyst to this discussion that had to happen, where you (mods) take it and if and how you act on it will in my opinion determine the survival of the forums

Yes as long as this site is active the forums will be here...just in what form?...bye Bob

vv...theres a couple of sayings

You can't see the wood for the trees....
you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it....

Either way Bob you just confirmed what i thought...

No matter what you think of me Amanda that's not important. Yes there have to be some rules granted, outlandish behaviour should not be tolerated, But if nothing changes in the way you guys moderate the forums they will continue to die, its that simple.

'Only you guys can change that, you have to loosen your grip on the forums.....yes I can modify and sanitise my posts in the hope they wont be deleted or locked, but I become a shadow of myself.... if you can't be yourself on the forums whats the point, therefore I won't post end of story and I'm obviously not alone.'

^Nicko, just take a moment and read what you write. Ponder. Have you ever gone to a bar, got drinks and ended up drunk? Were you just being yourself? You may ask what am I getting at...

well aren't there laws concerning public intoxication? Aren't there laws about what you can and can't do while in public? Aren't there laws about how much noise one can produce at a certian time? There are laws upon laws, I can go on and on.

But even though there are all these rules, people still go out, they drink, get drunk, make noise, and have fun. If your theory was true wouldn't everyone stop going out to places like bars? Would they stop driving in fear they might get a ticket? Would they stop living their live just because of some rules? NO! Get a grip, take a look around. It isn't only us that can make a change. It is everyone as a whole, and untill you get that through your head, nothing will ever change.

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Okay, I am going to restate something I am currently reading in a book which I feel hits directly on the spot of this topic, seeing as everyone is involved in this so called 'quarrel' that comes and goes...

Ever stop to ask yourself just what causes quarrels? At least 99 percent of the time, quarrels start over petty, unimportant matters...Both parties leave the battle nervous, tense. Nothing has been settled, and both parties have new ammunition to make the next quarrel more vicious. Little things, petty thinking, causes arguments. So, to eliminate quarrels, eliminate petty thinking.

Here's a technique that works: before complaining or accusing or reprimanding someone or launching a counterattack in self-defense, ask yourself, "Is it really important?" In most cases, it isn't and you avoid conflict.

When you feel like taking negative action, ask yourself, "Is it really important?" That question works magic in building a finer situation. It works in any situation in life that is apt to produce quarrels.

Peace, Joe

So far I think you and the rest of the Mods have missed the point, have a look at the last thread on this forum that was locked The Hunting Thread for Interesting People and the reasons given, this was then discussed further in feedback forum before Abby was walked over, even threatened with penalties, that thread has now been deleted I think??

Yes Joe I understand what you are trying to get at, but your analogy is off the mark.... yes I've been out many many times, had drinks, probably had far too much on occasion and were I to drive would have been over the limit, these places are used to this activity, they want you in there, they are designed for it, they want you to have fun, of course they want your money! at times we all push the limits and on occasion, may go close to getting kicked out, 99% of people know how far you can push before that happens. We all go home, I'm happy I've had a good time, they're happy they have my money. The rules are simple break them and you get kicked out. The rules must be consistent for everyone, the place must be fun.

Now Joe this is the crux of what I'm trying to get at, how many bars are out there? hundreds, we all have a choice as to where we go, if some are too strict or inconsistent in there rules, and the main one, Not Fun! you don't go there, you go somewhere else.

And that's what's happened with the forums, they're simply not fun any more!!! There are too many inconsistencies happening, Mods act independently of each other, what is acceptable to one Mod is not to another.

My second point is: its not a matter of pointing the finger and saying its not just the mods fault or the members fault, that we're all to blame, that we all have to change modify our behaviour, ok as much as it would be great and say: Ok we (Mods) will change but you (Members) have to change as well. If only!!! But that won't happen, why, because members come and go, we're a transient bunch if its fun to stop at the forums we stop, if its not we won't. Bloody selfish I know but that's the way of it and that won't change, new members who haven't read the rules to the letter will always post off topic, post poems etc big deal, we want them to post not delete their posts, threads. If its not fun no one will post or become active on the forums.....

Please understand we're not against you, this is not a get the mod thing, its not personal....But the only way to make the forums active is for you guys to stop being over zealous extend the boundaries before deleting posts or threads...

I want to reiterate one more time the forums are not fun for the members anymore!! And until they are nothing will change, its part of your job as Mods to help make them fun otherwise you're not doing your job.......

I don't get the big finger pointing argument.

There are rules to follow, don't like the rules, don't post, if you want to post, follow the rules. Everyone loves to jump on the mod bashing bandwagon, but I see a bigger problem with the members. Some good debates have taken place on this site, but just the same there are countless overdone threads and pointless threads floating around.

I come here for poetry and if I am bored or looking for something inspirational I venture into the forums. Like any other spot on the web, this place has it's ups and downs, but improvements aren't made by only one side compromising. I have plenty of fun around this site.

Bob It seems you have picked out of my post what suits your position, fine what ever rocks your boat, avoid the real issue, fine that's your prerogative, I was trying to be non confrontational, seems I failed on that point, and ok I accept your point, it could have been worded better.

The post was meant as a constructive one, if nobody takes any heed of it well theres nothing I can do about that.

I think I'm done on this topic, if things change I guess you may see me on the forums again

Hmmmm...indeed, my threads have disappeared from the feedback forum. Most annoying. So, this has all started all over again- not because I started a thread, but because it was locked without cause. It was never my intention to get into Mod attack, it's very tiring and useless, especially as the Mod team has exactly the same members as in the past. And, Nicko, this thread isn't getting you far. History repeats itself. Let me save you some time- I've done some research and dug up a few historical threads, so we can all save time and energy.

http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/discussion/topic.html?topic_id=94012
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/discussion/topic.html?topic_id=94004
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/discussion/topic.html?topic_id=94392
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/discussion/topic.html?topic_id=95488

Remember these? These threads were also started with good intentions for the betterment of the site...and I still think they have valid content, in terms of there being guidelines for both members and mods to follow so everyone knows where and how they stand in all fairness.

However, as we all know, through lack of humility and compromise on either side, these threads created nothing but bitterness and division.

What we need is a different approach. We need to get on each other's good side. We need a thread that doesn't have sides, but involves Mods and other members equally and with humour, and still makes a point. We need a thread that stimulates us and makes us friends, one that tests our mettle while it tests the abilities of members to stay within the rules, and the abilities of moderators to stop locking them without cause.

I've got an idea so interesting that it belongs in the Interesting thread. If anything, hopefully it will distract us from this topic for a while.

Some of those brought a wee smile to my face Abby.

lawdy I used to be so passionate about this place!

Do you know why this rule was even implemented, no seriously, do you know why. Because I used to post them as well and was upset when the rule was made because I thought the ones I posted were relevant to the topic at hand, then came to find out that the threads were hard to load because of the COUNTLESS poetry being posted at random in almost every thread. I wish we had an archive of threads that were older that have been deleted, then even you would agree something had to be done....

^ Dude, time to upgrade your computers.. we live in the days of high speed internet and flat screen monitors. Can't expect to fix rules to match the slowness of your own technology.

This is a poetry site, we should definitely be allowed to include poetry in the forums.. I mean, if it's relevant, and it usually is.
If a thread gets too lengthy, time to lock it and start a new one with the same subject. Am I crazy? I strongly believe I am not.
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Lol, too funny, these forums will survive one way or the other, with or without you and me. We are but a small entity in the overall scheme of things. If you've studied the history of this site, it always does poorly traffic wise in the summer time......

^ It's the summer time in some parts of the world, winter time in others. I don't think it's a seasonal issue unless you can prove that summer has lasted on this site for 1-2 years. The forums have been pretty dead and boring. Of course that's my humble opinion, but I'm not pulling it out of my butt. I've been watching. We want to liven the place up a bit, but before we can do that, we need to ask you mods to please not be so hasty in closing discussions! Please. I, for one, am not trying to take your power or eliminate it. I'm asking, with respect to your power, that you actually take into account what I've suggested. I know it's easy to say, "Well I'm a mod, you're not, you haven't seen what I've seen, trust that I know better." That's very easy to say and though it holds merit, respect that I've been on this site a long time and Kevin is an ex mod and a member of my club. Joe was in my club for some time as well. I'm not oblivious. I care about this site. My happiness does not depend on the forums changing, but I have friendships here and the forums are an escape from boredom and mostly, an opportunity to learn and teach. That's what I like to think of them as. But the forums are victim to the hastiness of mods, as I've said.
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Either way Bob you just confirmed what i thought...

^ This seems unnecessary in all fairness. We should all be a bit more open minded and flexible with opinions, instead of brushing people and their actions/ideas off with predetermination.. That and you mentioned something along the lines of it being a mods duty to make the forums fun. Wait what? It's not a mods duty to make anything fun, but perhaps it's in a mod's best interest to refrain from restricting stimulating debates and forms of fun.

Alright maybe you've never said it, I don't know, but my point wasn't to quote anyone exactly.. it was a sum of what our arguments boil down to frequently. You are a mod and I am not. Nothing wrong with saying it. But I am sorry I offended you - not my intention.

I'm not going to count the forums as we both know, but I've noticed a considerable decline in activity for more than just this summer. You disagree then? Hmm..

*You* are to determine what poetry is relevant I suppose. You already are the determiners of relevance, are you not? It's your job to use your best judgment in that.
The ones that aren't can be moderated, the ones that are relevant.. should be left as is.
Anyway, we've all got our different opinions. I'm not planning on posting any poems in forums, that's not how I roll, but I think whoever wants to include a poem to express themselves.. should be allowed to do so by all means.