Dating Deal Breakers

What do you consider to be a "deal breaker" when it comes to dating? Perhaps it's something small and insignificant, such as the bad habit of chewing with their mouths open, or something larger and significant, such as that they are in their late 20's and still live at home.

A deal breaker for me, if I were still on the dating scene, would be the way that the person treats other people. I dislike it when someone mistreats, is rude or disrespectful, and such, to other people. It's not a good first impression and tells me exactly what I could expect later on (in regards how he'll continue to treat others or even myself). I wouldn't stand for it.

^ I agree. It also shows that he is a well-mannered, old-fashioned individual. When my partner meets someone he always extends his hand and says hello followed by with friendly small talk. He's one of those people who, honestly, likes to talk and is interested in getting to know someone on a personal level. I do too. But it always bugs me when I meet someone and they don't make a gesture to shake my hand and instead wave. Sometimes they even just keep their hands in their pockets. Not only do I think that's rude but it's a piss poor first impression and doesn't give me much incentive to want to get to know them on a personal level. You don't see many people now a days with the same old-fashioned courtesy. When I do I am usually impressed and in high-spirits.

Another deal breaker for me would be if the person had meddling friends, same sex or not, who tried or succeeded in intruding on our affairs or in our business. Yeah, you're friends and feel you have a sense of self-righteousness or obligation, I get that because I am close to all my friends however, he's a "big boy" and if he needs advise he'll come to you.

This has happened to me before. I was 13yrs old and had been "dating" this guy for around a week. He was friends with another girl who use to be in the same class/school as me, and because of that we had already added each other on Messenger before I met him. On Messenger one day she sends me a message basically telling me that I should be doing "my job" and should be "pleasing him", in other words having sex with him. I thought to myself, after a week of "dating", I don't think so. Because of that incident, as well as several other contributing factors such as he tried to psychologically control me and was sleeping with a friend on the side, I said enough and goodbye.

Right on, Britt! I think you can tell so much about a guy by the way he treats his mother (or grandmother, or sisters...) These are the women who have been around the worst of him, and who he's probably seen the worst of. If a guy treats these ladies with respect and love, even when they have probably annoyed him a gajillion times, then he'll probably treat you well too.

A deal breaker for me would probably be if someone was too stuck in routine. I'm not some crazy girl - I enjoy my nights on the couch with a movie - but if someone did the same thing every day with no room for spontaneity and fun, I'd probably go a bit nuts.

I agree Sib, I wouldn't be able to stand someone who was stuck in a routine. My partners cousin doesn't have a job, go to school and doesn't have a girlfriend. All he does is watch tv and play games. I'm so happy my partner doesn't take after him. I have my days, like you said where I like to sit on the couch and watch a good movie, but most days I am spontaneous and like to go out or try new things.

Deal Breaker: If a guy insults people playfully. I mean insults like "bitch" or "hoe" or "it's because you're not good enough." I mean, don't we have enough real down talk in this world?

And another, I agree about the how he treats people thing. If he treats ANYONE like crap or is mean, even roughly playful-toned, it's a no go.

I'd like to believe that we are all our own people. Yet i've met so many people who are just like their parents.
I'm not saying that everyone from a great family is a great person, but more that if their parents and family have obvious flaws, they are more than likely to be traits that are carried though the generation.
Commitment stands out to me, i've know people whos parents have been married for ever, and their children respect themselves, and other people enough to be able to persue a longterm relationship. I know alot of people who bed hop, and disrespect themselves as a result, who have never had a relationship with their fathers.

I also believe that people can be exception to this generalisation, but it takes a well balanced mind to do so.

I also think that we as a nation look for longterm mates, who spare the characteristics and natures of our own family. My boyfriend is so much like my dad, they are in the same line of work, have similar hair styles and we even met with a remarkably close story of how my parents met. I am also very similar to his mother, not in appearance, but definately in attitude and life style.

So to me if a guy comes from a more positive family background i am much more relaxed, and if its a background i can relate to, then i know i'm on to a winner.