Anyone else feel this way?

I don't have a problem telling someone how I really feel but it seems like its always one sided. Its always seems like its me talking about my problems and it kinda makes me feel worse. I would like someone to understand me not just someone to listen to what I have to say. Its always good to let it out but I find it to have a level of superiority; if I keep talking, its almost like im putting myself down. I miss having a best friend who I can talk to about anything and vice versa. I have a few people who I want or was best friends with in the past but it seems like they have moved on. I guess on one note, im a really shy and quiet person so other people don't find me a person worth telling stuff to, on the other hand I really like listening to others. Ill pretty much like anyone who talks a lot :P just because I don't have to :)

Its been really bothering me lately, just needed to get it out.

I know how you feel. I've been feeling like that to. I miss talking to my friends about things, I stoped talking to them about bad things becaues i don't want to bring them down, but it brings me down to. So I get how you feel. If one day you want to talk just PM me. :) I love talking

I know what you mean. Its almost as if you tell someone then you're bringing them down and making them depressed so you don't tell them. But then it hurts you not to say something.

Thanks guys, it helps just to know there are people out there who understands.

I am able to differentiated between good and bad choices but I have realized that my depression has been clouding my mind within the past 4-5 years. I know what you mean when you said the difference between things you can change and the choice not to. I know I should be trying to change my life for the better but somehow I always end up just lying in bed dwelling about things I want to change. I feel I have lost all inspiration and motivation in doing anything nowadays. I have thought about dealing with this depression with councilors and medication but the thing is that I have dealt with it so long, it has become apart of me and I feel as if I will be losing apart of me if that happens.

Ill give you a short story about my friendships within the past few years. Ive always been a shy person, every since high school. I got a job at Save-on-foods at the end of grade 10 where I met two guys Mason and Thomas who ended up being my best friends for 2-3 years'ish. They changed my life forever and I will never forget that. I was sheltered up until I met them and they pretty much filled me in on everything I didn't understand. I use to spend all day in my house gaming 8-12 hours a day. They made me socialize, taught me how to have fun in life. We use to spend all day together, we had a routine of hanging out right after school. They were the first people to ever respect me for who I am. Then things started to change, Mason started stressing out at work and Thomas had a kid. I didn't realize it at first but all 3 of us slowly drifted apart. To the present day... now Mason has a girlfriend and the only way Ill see him is at work and he's not the same to talk to, he is more judgmental towards everyone around him so I slowly close off my real self from him. He treats me like a inferior rather than a equal, that really turned me off for telling him anything. He's always telling me advice on what to do and what not to do, he's turning into a parent than a friend. (I don't need someone to tell me everyone is going to be ok, I just want someone to understand.) Thomas' kid is 1 years old last month, he's 20 and a dad. Its been a life experience for him, I can understand where he's coming from but him and Mason are still close friends; it feels like I have been left out. Just the way those 2 talk to one another is difference than if I were included. It feels as if they are hiding something from me.

Another one of my friends Sarah, shes been rather close to me within the past year. Shes also close friends with Mason and Thomas, shes been ignoring me lately. Just the way she responds to me and on how she won't make direct eye contact with me anymore. Makes me wonder what I did wrong. I asked her if she was mad at me and she just ignored me and walked away. I can't apologize for something I don't know I did.

These 3 friends would be my deep friendships and I don't want to loss them, Im pretty much holding them for dear life atm.

Oh fyi I work with all 3 XD

Thank you if you've made it this far :P