What makes a realtionship LAST...

Ii never been able to be in a long-term relationship and i am in the point in life where i want something serious to be with someone for longer then a couple months.
what are some things or ways that makes a relationship last more then just a couple of months.

I don't think you can force something to last. Instead, if you have the right compatibility, it should last of its own accord. So, don't look for someone to fulfill a long-term desire, wait until the right person comes along. Grow in your relationship slowly. Treat it, and the person, with respect and care, and keep communication lines open. Allow vulnerability.... if the person is right.

Awwwwww thank you.. i get it... i have to just live one day at a time.

The two of you would make it last...nothing you just do makes it last...love and trust and lots more not really anything to say on how to make it last...they just do.

Don't have sex until you absolutely, absolutely can't wait any longer.

Any relationship where i've not done this failed. Not sure what that says about my abilities mind.

Its hard because now-a-days thats all guys want. its like if you arent willing to sleep with them. they will leave you and go for the one that will. and its hard because mostly every guy is like that.

Exactly! So by making that same guy wait will both test whether he's worth your time in the first place, make him work harder at trying to bed you - which in turn makes him find out more about you, talk to you, treat you, cuddle you etc all the things which form the foundations of a relationship :)

Yeah, if a guy passes you over because another girl would sleep with him sooner, that will never be the basis for a long-lasting relationship. It's true, there will be fewer guys who will be willing to wait, but aren't those the ones YOU would want to wait for, anyhow? Weed out some of the bad ones.

^ I'd say all guys ARE looking for sex =P well nearly all.

But i do very much agree, even though it may be on their mind; they respect having to wait and do admire someone who doesn't give in too easily :P

I think the harder we have to work - the more grateful in turn we are to that person.

Its hard cause i want to take things slow and not rush into anything til i know i am ready but most guys after the first date they want to rush into having sex and then i say no and we never talk again. but i have date all types of guy and they all end up being like that. and i wonder if all guy are like that...

Sibyllene, your first post took the words right out of my mouth. I feel like anything I say thereafter will only come up short in comparison, haha.

Commitment! Well I guess that's obvious. Haha. If you're committed it will last. But my real point about commitment is that both you and the guy are willing to try and work through anything and never give up on each other or your love.

By the way, not all guys want sex on the first date (actually they do WANT it but not all of them will do anything to get it and then leave you if they don't). This is the thing- if you are in a long term relationship, the guy should figure out that if he stays with you for long enough and treats you well he will eventually get sex. The whole point is waiting and patience (which not all guys have). Rest assured I know guys who are willing to wait and take it slow (my boyfriend is one!), but they are sadly outnumbered by the ones who want to rip your clothes off in the first month.
Don't give up! You'll find him. I'm in my first relationship and it's already turning long term. But that's because I waited for it to find me rather than go searching or desperately trying to make something work. Let it happen.

I could list off a bunch of things, and I am sure they were already mentioned.
- Trust
- Communication
- Friendship
- ect ect.

One thing to remember, some relationships are not meant to last. If that is the case, nothing that can be done. I learned that the hard way.

I think once i hit the bottom i will learn how to make things right the next time. but i do know many of the things i did wrong and mostly what was wrong was we didnt have trust for one another we let other people influence our thought and it brought us to make the wrong choices. when the relationship was between me and him and not me and his friends and my friends.

Continue to share new experiences with your partner to keep the thrill of the relationship alive. Communication is important, make it clear what you want and make sure they are clear about what they want. Hopefully your wants are reasonable and overlap a good amount. Be sweet. Yes, you should be yourself, but the main thing I see scaring guys off after the initial infatuation is how mean their girlfriends can become. Of course it can go both ways, but that's what I've been witnessing most lately. Girlfriends that are overly sarcastic and bossy and expect too much. Relationships are mutual so remember to give as much as you wish to receive. Fairness makes people happy. Also trust, but in a different way than you might consider. Trust isn't all about if your partner can prove he or she is trustworthy. Sometimes you have to hold whoever you care about with an open hand and let them have their breathing space. It can be scary and there's no guarantee what will happen, but if you are suffocating the person you want to be with, it will harbor resentment and bitterness that could eventually drive them away. It's tempting to grip the ones you love with an iron fist and not give them the opportunity to slip up, but that's not a healthy practice for you or for them. You want someone to continue desiring your affection for a long time? Don't make them feel like your life and happiness is dependent on them. It's too much pressure. They started caring for you in the first place because you were an individual apart from themselves.

Good luck. Long lasting relationships take a bit of a luck and a lot of effort.

^ Sounds like an interesting read, I'll have to check it out. Thanks.

I think I would be a Quality Time person too; my fiance likely a Words of Affirmation. Although I think that is true with most men.

[Edit]

I actually just checked out the website and took the quiz. It's been confirmed, I tied for both Quality Time and Acts of Service, but the QT was stronger. Neat. I should get my fiance to take the quiz just for fun.

You've got me intrigued, haha.

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 5 months now, and we haven't even had sex yet. Its a lot better if you wait until you are sure you are ready. And use the correct safety precautions of course. Birth control, condoms etc. I've never liked someone as much as I do my current boyfriend. We have been best friends for four years before we have even started dating, and it has totally taken the awkwardness out of our relationship. We know everything about each other. Which is a good thing. Just take your time. You never know, that "one" might be just around the corner. (:

HONESTY always prolongs relationships