Having kids

How old is "too young" to have a child. i know its a matter of personal opinion, so i want yours.

Dependent on the parents. I'm going to wait until closer to 30 than to 20.

I would say around 25. It seems like a good age to have kids. lol Just in case you get married at like twenty-one so you will have four free years! :]

I guess everyone has a different maturity level and so for each person the age could be different based on beliefs, maturity etc... (in my personal opinion i think twenty and up is okay) but everyone to their own :)

30 is a good age. By then, you should be sorted out and stable enough to provide a good home and upbringing.

Plus, wait til you are a bit older gives you more time for yourself, to figure out who you are.

I think there is a maturity level more than an age... either way people need to think it through and be prepared emotionally and physically. I live in the middle east and here many get married and have kids at a young age. My mom got married at 16 years and had me when she was 17. Two of my friends got married at about 17 and had kids months later. They seem happy and responsible and they actually wanted the life they're living before they got themselves into it. On the other hand there are older people who I know who have kids, but they don't raise or take care of them as they should, if they do, they're not happy about it... so, it depends a lot on the parents, how ready they are and how mature they are.

For me I think an appropriate age is after 20, where the person will be physically ready and mature for children. Also, having kids at this age will help children get along more with their parents because the generation gap between them isn't too big. However, I believe that the parents should know each other and have spent time living together or married before they think of having kids.

It also depends on the goals parents have for their lives and what they want to do with their lives. If a woman wants to have a child she should know what she wants to do with her life, whether she wants to study or work, and how much that would effect her life. Same for a man, if he wants a child he should think of his job and life and how to balance between being a father and his job.

I agree with the above statement: "I think it's a maturity level more than an age." Of course, I do feel someone who is just a teenager (13, 14, 15, 16, etc.) is too young, but then again I know some adults who aren't ready (admittedly or not) either.

Here's a few ways I look at it:

1. You must learn and be able to support yourself first before you take on the responsibility of supporting another. If you cannot support yourself (if you live at home with your parents still or other, don't have a steady job, didn't finish school/college/university, etc.) then how do you expect to support someone else, let alone a baby. It's not fair, that's what it is, to bring a baby into this world with no support. Love is simply not enough, nor should that be the only reason or main reason to have a baby. A person's financial situations should be taken into serious consideration, people should be honest with themselves on whether they will be physically and emotionally ready to take on that responsibility yet, they should look at their living conditions (do they live in an apartment, condo or other, is the place of residence neat or messy) and relationship status (are you in a steady relationship, at the beginning of a relationship or other), etc. My advise for anyone is to get your life on track and do the things you need to do for yourself (figure out who you are) first.

"However, I believe that the parents should know each other and have spent time living together or married before they think of having kids."

^ That is also very important as well, to have a good developed relationship as you said as well as a good foundation.

As the girl or women carrying the baby, if you don't have a stable job it can make looking for a job or keeping one very hard. If you're with someone and they don't have a stable job or are even involved in you or your unborn child's life, that's even harder. Besides, I think it's best to have a stable job and to save your money before having a baby, that way you're not living cheque by cheque and instead you can live comfortably without having any to little money problems.

2. Finish high school first, at least! I don't frown upon people who want children young or think there's anything wrong with that. However, I think it's important that before you have children that you finish high school (get your GED) first, that way more job opportunities for you are open and if you decide to go to college/university later on in life you don't have to worry about going back to make up for classes you didn't get.

Along with finishing high school, like I said in my first point, you shouldn't take having a baby lightly. Take it seriously, be honest with yourself and plan ahead of time (take into consideration your living situation, whether you are financially able to take care of this baby, physically and emotionally read to take on the responsibility, and any other aspect of your life that's important such as your social life and relationship status). Once you've done that, if you decide you want a baby and discuss it with your significant other, then go from there.

Those are just a few of the important things I think any one (whether they are just a teenager or even adults) needs to take into consideration first before having a baby.

My personal preference. I am 20yrs old now and I would like to have my first baby around 25yrs old (or even sooner). That said, I don't feel I can put a definite number or a deadline on it, on the other hand, I would prefer not to be older than 25yrs old. I don't want to rush myself into it yet nor do I want to prolong it. Both my fiance and I feel the same way. In a way, we're both ready, although I'm sure he's more ready than I am, yet we don't want to rush one another or ourselves. I know however for sure I'm not completely 100% ready, I still have my own ambitions and goals to achieve before I am ready. I want to move back to the city, go back to university/college, have a steady job I love, graduate, have a career, spend more quality one-on-one time with my fiance doing the things we want to do together, I want still go out with my friends, want to take on more extra curricular activities (modeling, fitness classes, first aid, sign language, etc.), have our own place and get a dog. In general, the most important thing to me is to be financially stable, find myself and spend more time with my fiance just as the two of us and with friends. Once I achieve most of those goals and ambitions, then I would like to discuss with my fiance about having a baby, whatever our age at that time may be (23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28 or older).

What's more is that on my parents side there are triplets and twins and on my fiance's parents side there are twins. That's something else to take into consideration, haha!

So i know a guy in his mid thirties who had his first son at age 17. he's got 4 kids now. success story in a way, but gone wrong at the beginning?

Raising kids is hard, whether you plan it or not, whether you're old or young... it depends on many things, but the beginning is always hard. Because you need to come to terms with yourself, find out your personality as a parent and balance that with being a husband or wife, a son or daughter, a sister or brother, a friend, a professional at work and all the other social roles in society. It is hard to do that and it takes a while to get used to. As a candidate teacher you have to put a classroom management plan for everything you do as a teacher, as a parent you need to do the same and not every method works, not every way goes smoothly, you need to learn through it from yourself, others and your kids... it takes time to be successful as a parent, some get there, some don't.

I'll be 21 in less then a month and my fiance is 26. Honestly? We both really want to have a child, he's already half way through his schooling and is firmly into his career of choice and his standing in that field, he's done a lot of traveling, seeing the world and is quite mature for his age, he'd love if I agreed to having a baby on the way before summer.

Much as he feels he's ready to settle down and start our own family I don't think I am yet. I love him to pieces and would love to have a baby but I know I still have some growing to do before I'm responsible for the well being of another person, especially one that would depend on me so much. I'm still to impatient, selfish at times and unsure of myself and the world to give our child the security I'd like to. He's already stated very clearly he'd prefer me to be a stay at home mom, I'm not ready for that. I want to travel some, try my hand at different things like modeling, different schooling, more volunteer work and time for just us before we bring a baby into the world.

I'm thinking 23 or 24 would be a good age. When I'm 24 he'll be barely 30, both still a good age but having time to have grown, figured out who we are totally and formed our life together more solidly as we'll have been married for a few years by then.

My opinion, whenever yur ready, not lyke 12, 13, 14 or what not but i was 16 when i had my son and i matured QUICK! its all a mattter or maturity and yu capability anyone can have a baby but it takes a real person to raise it and become a responsible adult.