Round 3 (~Dixiedaisy's~) Results- Most Fun You Ever Had

Here are the results of Round 3.

The poems for round 4 are due tomorrow. If you have not sent yours please do so as soon as possible so that judging can occur. Thanks everyone.

***Abandonment and You Seduce Me tied for first with 98 points each. In second place is Ode to Liz with 97 points.

*** This poem used prompt #5 for 5 bonus points

Bait to Devour. 86 points total 91 points

As the sun crosses earth
in vernal equinox,
I come alive like perennials
in spring,

trifling in artful ways
towards fruition
as I feast on
poission d'avrils;
bait to devour.

A habitual tradition
for jesters alike,
forevermore.

--
poission d'avril (April fish) - A young, easily caught fish; a guillible person

Prompt: April 1, 1700 - April Fools tradition popularized.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___9
Total Points __24

A direct poem that says so much in very few words. A delightful read encompassing the nature of April Fools Day.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___3
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __20

Very creative and clever. I did, however, feel a little let down when it ended so quickly.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___9
Total Points __23

Ahhh, I loved this write, and especially the line ..
"as I feast on
poission d'avrils;
bait to devour."
Unique and creative write that the poet artfully describes how some love to pull pranks.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 7
Total Points __ 19

I liked this write but found it didn't create a lot of imagery for me.
A short poem with few words must create a stir in the reader's mind very quicklyand I feel just a few more lines would of done that.

*** This poem used prompt #4 for 4 bonus points

The "Greatest" Daughter - 86 points total 90 points

"float like a butterfly,
sting like a bee"
ain't she pretty
just like me

brains and beauty
quickness and brawn
telling all comers
"let's get it on"

that's my daughter
making me so proud
call me "the mouth"
as I shout it out loud.

**Judges if you don't know who "the greatest" is, then you definitely will be clueless as to who his daughter is.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __22

This brought back a lot of memories with the opening line. It was the "catch phrase" back in the day, there is no way I wouldn't know this is about his daughter. She is beautiful, strong and deserving of her title. I grappled with thinking it should be longer, guessing it is shorter like some of his rounds.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __24

Muhammad Ali about his daughter, Laila
This author captured perfectly the tone and clipped pace of Muhammad Ali's speech before his illness. The last stanza could have been stronger....I found it a little flat.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __21

The first line of the poem should establish enough in the reader to tell whom the poem is referencing. If you take out all of the quotes that reference "The Greatest" , there is very little content to the poem. It could be enhanced by focusing more on the daughters feats.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 7
Total Points __ 19

Even though I found this poem rather short for my liking, I do like how the writer took on the voice of Muhammad Ali in rhyme. I am not sure if the writer incorporated
the rhyme into the poem on purpose or not but it did enhance the voice of "The Greatest"
I would like to see a little more length to this write though.

*** This poem used prompt #3 for 3 bonus points

You Seduce Me. -95 points total 98 points

The thickness of your voice
settles within the pool of smoke
clouding your eyes -
rugged roughness barks out
a harsh tone you didn't intend,
and it pulls me into a tainted melody.

How the drops of wine dabble
so sweetly on your lips,
the contrast of your candied mouth
touching such coarse masculinity
sparks an interest in that rumbling laugh
you flirtatiously cast out.

My mind is racing
with my fingertips longing to touch
the crook of your jaw,
where stubble has begun to form -
you create a weakness in my belly
that circle my steps into seduction.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___9
Total Points __24

If ever a love poem found grasped the line between "love and lust" it would be this one.
Erotically written in a subtle way.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __25

This piece is proof positive that it doesn't necessarily take multi-syllable words or overly esoteric metaphors to produce a good poem. The simple language with a touch of rawness was masterfully used here.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __25

There is something so sensual about this write. I loved the masculine words used throughout. It showed that the little things about a man is what makes him so attractive.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 8
Total Points __ 21

I really like how the writer used a choice from A,B and C in this poem.
The writer painted clear imagery. A little heavy on the "your" though.

*** This poem used prompt #3 for 3 bonus points

Great Family Expectations-69 points total 72 points

Sunrise hidden by pines and cedars on the east
side of his house where he latter saw a red
flame of it glaring through the cedars, not like sunrise
but like a forest fire. From the window of his front room
the sun shone silently with solemn power through
the pine branches.

The smoke followed the tracks, close by, and rose
toward the skies like the prayers of the passengers
who prayed the prayers of pilgrims in the wilderness.
Close by a grave would wait in the lay cemetery of Our
Lady of Gethsemane, a place of Peace and Paradox.

Farther north is the Ohio river where my great uncle's blood
would mingle with the flowing river meandering with no
rhyme nor reason to yet another river. Like the blood of the Father
passed to the Son. There seems to be no point of rest,
yet by a river of mercy each family member may be washed
clean.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___3
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __20

Very catching opening and closing line, though becomes a little distracting with the repetition of so many words. There were so many lines that captured the imagination and provided great imagery, though the poem needs to be tightened up a bit. Not sure if "latter" is supposed to be "later" but it would certainly flow better with the latter not the later. (Hoping that made sense as a use of the word latter) Overall a nice write that makes one interested to know the story behind the poem.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___0...repetition
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___7
Total Points __16

I love the creativity and concept of this piece, but the word repetition in every stanza was very off-putting.
pines/pine
like/like
prayers/prayed/prayers
river/river/river/river

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___3
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___3
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___3
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___7
Total Points __16

Spelling/Grammar- I gave a score of 3 because it seemed too wordy without getting the point across in repetitious words.
Creativity/Cleverness Also gave a 3, the poem was creative in imagery but not in word choices.
Content- Again, I gave a 3 because the poems flow was disrupted with the repetitious words.
Prompt-o-meter got 7, I felt the poem did reach the qualifications for how well they delivered the prompt, though it was a little vague in letting the reader know anything.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 3
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 3
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 7
Total Points __ 17

I like how this write unfolded but ... (yes that awful dreaded but that every poet hates to hear)
I had a very hard time with the punctuation in this write.
I tried to stop when told to stop, and pause when told to pause, but I found it tripped me up and halted the flow in parts.

***This poem used prompt #3 for 3 bonus points

Quitting- 69 points total 72 points

I decided to steal for the final time,
one last sip from your bitter wine,
one last breath from your cigarette,
for I no longer love the way flames smell.

Today you won't cling around these fingers,
I pulled you off,
I heaved the ring I thought was there too!

So, stop laughing in the subtle rain,
as love isn't the only thing I gave up on,
I have quit acting madness too...

Hence, I decided to taste for the final time,
all the things that I haven't

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___3
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___7
Total Points __20

I was lost when I got to this line "I heaved the ring I thought was there too!"
How can you heave something that you thought was there? The line "I have quit acting madness too" doesn't quite do it for me. Maybe just shorten it to mad. Overall, I liked the substance and depth of this write.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___0...repetition
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___3
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___3
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___6
Total Points __12

Nine "I's in four short stanzas is ghastly. Especially when there are so many more poetic ways to word this piece.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___3
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __20

It is natural to outgrow someone and feel that you need a change. This was the concept I received from the write. Very clever ending. I found the grammar use confusing and the repetition of I's were quite annoying.
However, I really enjoyed the prompt use and the delivery of each cleverly woven in the stanzas without sticking out like a sore thumb.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 3
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 6
Total Points __ 17

I, I, I, nine to be exact !
Far too many for my liking but that is just my opinion.
I must admit I do like the clever spin the writer incorporated into this write though.

***This poem used prompt #4 for 4 bonus points.

Ode to Liz- 93 points total 97 points

My Beautiful Lady,

I sleep, perchance to dream once more
of a love, a life-time gone before
my ego came and took control
my life, my sense, my love it stole.

Cleopatra, you took my breath away
yet my roving eye, still did stray
a drunk! a flirt! a fool! was I
let the truth be known before I die.

No woman could ever take your place
no other did feel my true embrace
though we're apart I dream at will
that you'll come back, this void to fill.

A drunk, washed up, still here's the truth
as I look back upon my youth
mistakes were made, though you're not one
you're still my earth, my stars, my sun.

I curse myself, then curse some more
that I could ever let you go
not once, but twice, we signed with quill
you left both times yet, I love you still.

No manuscript, no part to act
when opposites meet they just attract
you had me from the first hello
why, oh why did I let you go?

Forever yours

R xx

*Speculating on the possible content of the unpublished love letter Elizabeth Taylor took to her grave.
*The cliche writings are intended as most of the letters of that era were very cliche

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __23

What a pleasurable read doting on the letters possible content. What I loved most about this poem was the simplistic way it flowed without sounding too cliched.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __25

I would love to think the letter she was buried with expressed the sentiments in this poem.Theirs was such an intense, flaming and doomed love. Even though the rhyming faltered in one small place, I found this piece enchanting.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __24

The poem rhymed except this line...

I curse myself, then curse some more
that I could ever let you go

Otherwise the poem is amazing, heartfelt and clever. Nicely done.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 8
Total Points __ 21

I really like the rhyme in this write. My only critique would be in these lines
" I curse myself, then curse some more
that I could ever let you go"
otherwise it flowed very nicely.
The title is very fitting and the content tugs at the heart.
Very nice read!

*** This poem used prompt #4 for 4 bonus points.

Abandonment- 94 points total 98 points

I watched you twirl,
clutching the hem of a
white dress in hand.
Your lips vinaceous,
bitter with the
stained fruit
of a salty plum.

Yet still your smile
burst like fireworks, and
your eyes mimicked the
arrival of a full moon, who would
sit in silver on a black sky
that was too depressed to
meet the sun.

My thoughts grew somnolent
'tween the smoke of a cigarette
and I saw butterflies in the
strangest of places.
While you were finding solace
in sleeping,
I was finding solace in wine.

They said you thought
'madness was genius' and I
saw white mice in your hair.

Chewing at the roots of
abandonment -

for it was all you ever knew.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __ 25

Outstanding!

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __22

She was such an insecure and sad soul; used and abused by almost everyone she ever knew.
I know why the author included the words "somnolent" and "vinaceous" in this piece so I will not deduct points.. I do, however, think they are too heavy and don't mesh with the rest of the language.
It wasn't clear to me who the "I" is.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __ 25

I struggled with giving this poem a perfect score, but it reflects a perfect poem and thus deserves the score. Absolutely perfectly penned.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 5
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 8
Total Points __ 22

One of my favorite poems of the bunch alongside Ode to Liz.
This write created great imagery and held a nice steady flow with great word usage.
The title is very fitting as abandonment was a big part of the Blond Bombshell's life.
From foster home to orphanage to foster home again and again.
I am not sure who is the voice in this write but perhaps Shelly Winters?

This prompt used prompt #5 for 5 bonus points.

Requiem Ode to John Paul II -83 points total 88 points
as by his father

"Where is Poland?"
you asked a child
(she was stunned)
"In your smile."

Lifelong struggle to make us free
first the Nazis, then Iron Curtain,
lost sister, mother, brother, me,
never lost faith in Poland;
consecrated Lord's Arc church
gave Solidarity that strong perch

Delegate bishop you stood firm
made Vatican II become true
innocence of jews to confirm;
back home gauntlet you threw
against Soviet reins to bring
hope which made our people sing.

Heaven watched conclave choose you
white smoke streaming in Roman sky;
news burst like fireworks: John Paul II
wore Fisherman's Ring, made us sigh;
violins liltingly played
Corelli's Sonata for parade.

Amazed how you turned the page,
neither left nor right found time to blink,
human rights came to center stage,
church tradition stayed writ in ink;
mended fences, held peace up front,
Muslim, Jew, Greek and Protestant.

Missions to hostile lands you'd dare
steadfastly called for brotherhood
struck near dead in Saint Peter's Square
four shots hit - blood drenched - you stood;
yet forgave Mehmet, redeemed him
gave him a light that would not dim.

Strength gave out in aged years;
altar bore vinaceous stains
shaking hand (Parkinson appears)
spills God's wine-blood in holy rains.
Family waits, come to us, son,
slip away home, your work is done.

World, the second of April note,
for passing of this saintly man!
My Karol died, of whom is wrote:
tyranny's end truly began
when incorruptible Pope came
a new world order to proclaim.

Smoke brought you Rome
smoke brings you home;
my son sleeps
the world weeps.

Explanations
Line 4: These anecdotes are modified in some cases for the purpose of Rhetoric. [http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/pope/etc/anecdotes.html]

Lines 9 - 10: "The locals [of Nowa Huta] were supported by Bishop Karol Wojtyla and eventually, a church called the Lord's Arc was built [and] consecrated by Wojtyla in 1977. ... In the 1980s Nowa Huta became a place of many demonstrations and violent street protests of the Solidarity movement, fought by the police. At that time, almost 29,000 of the 38,000 workers of the then Lenin's Steelworks belonged to the Trade Union Solidarity'". [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nowa_Huta]

Lines 11 - 13: "One of the more controversial documents [in Vatican II] was Nostra Aetate, which stated that the Jews of the time of Christ, taken indiscriminately, and all Jews today are no more responsible for the death of Christ than Christians." [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Vatican_Council] "In the debate, there were many bishops who did not want those points in there, ... all of a sudden down at the far end of the table a man began to speak... it was a different voice because of the heavy accent. And the man spoke of the Church's responsibility to change its relationship to Jews. ... it was this young bishop from Poland. And no one even knew his name. And it was the first intervention he made at the Council. And it was very important." [http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/pope/etc/anecdotes.html]

Line 22: Corelli, La Folia Violin Sonata In D Minor 2 [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arcangelo_Corelli; http://wn.com/Corelli_La_Folia_Violin_Sonata_In_D_Minor_2] This sonata may or may not have been played during the celebration of JPII's inauguration.

Lines 31 - 34: "On May 13, 1981, Pope John Paul II was shot in St. Peter s Square by a Turkish political extremist, Mehmet Ali Agca. After his release from the hospital, the pope famously visited his would-be assassin in prison, where he had begun serving a life sentence, and personally forgave him for his actions." [Retrieved from http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/pope-john-paul-ii-dies on April 2, 2011 See also: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mehmet_Ali_A%C4%9Fca]

Line 37: [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pope_John_Paul_II]

Lines 41: [http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/pope-john-paul-ii-dies]

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___3
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___10
Total Points __ 23

While the poem was able to achieve the jist of Catholicism, it did not seem like it was very poetic from a fathers point of view. Just a list of events, though cleverly done.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___3
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __19

Interesting history lesson but it didn't evoke any emotional response from me. Perhaps it would have had more impact by putting the focus on just a few events of his life.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___5
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___3
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___5
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___8
Total Points __21

I didn't feel the poem was very clever in the content. However, it was very intriguing and brought tons of information to the table in respect of The Pope. I did enjoy the various use of all the interesting tid bits of information and how well they were put in to play throughout the poem.

Spelling/Grammar 1-5 points ___ 4
Creativity/ Cleverness 1-5 points ___ 4
Content ( flow, length, and does poem stay on topic) 1-5 points ___ 4
Prompt-o-Meter 1-10 points ___ 8
Total Points __ 20

The rhyme scheme in this write instantly caught my eye. I think this rhyme pattern worked well for this poem and created a very even flow.
The writer appears to be very knowledgeable about the topic and I am pleased that he/she gave explanations.
I apologize to the poet of this write for I must admit I do not know a lot about this topic other than what you have given in your explanations.
Therefore I am voting based on spelling/grammar/creativity/flow/and prompt-o-meter.
I did learn quite a bit in the 1 1/2 hours I spent on this write, so I must say thank you to the poet of this write
for the explanations.

Thanks to the judges. They obviously thought about their comments & are doing good work.

Thanks, again Dixie for running this contest.

What excellent poems, Great work everyone :)

I have received 4 of the poems for round 4, still some that haven't sent in. I am going to extend the deadline to Saturday for those who need it. To the other contestants that have sent in your poems and may have a different one you would like to replace it with, feel free to do so.

Remember, a nature poem in free verse. Bring it on to the judges.

I was very proud of the round 3 poems, seems like every round just got better and better, so I can't wait to see your round 4 poems.

Good Luck and any questions feel free to ask.

Butt head laugh Heh henh hmm she said rules

When five of my poems made the best love poems this was sent to me

Congratulations!We are renovating our best love poems page and following poem(s) qualify to be nominated as one of all time best love poems of Poems & Quotes! This page gets many visits as many first time visitors arrive from search engines (e.g. google.com) to this page. To compete for place on this page you have to select "Best Love Poem Category" witch relates to content of your poem. You can do it in "edit poem" page. If you don't want your poem to be on this list, select "none".

Now let's keep this contest fun

I believe at least one judge would give it a zero in Spelling/Grammar

Can anyone guess why?

PS I would let these judges proof read for me anytime no matter "witch".