Congrats Weekly Contest Winners 5.23

Awesome job, judges! Unfortunately we are 2 commenters short this week, but the correct number of votes were placed :)
Congratulations winners, honorable mentions, and everyone who was nominated. Thank you nominators for taking the time to read and nominate poems! Thank you poets for writing wonderful poems!
-Jane
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WINNERS:

In the News
by Kiko

As usual, this writer has something strong and topical to say, and he says it well. Quite descriptive and punchy. (7 pts)

A grand slam. The poem kept the tone of irony and disbelief at perfect pitch throughout. They showed us the hallmark of poetry - the ability to take a situation (a snippet of the news) and frame it in a way that gave it meaning. They saw the poem, where most people would just feel a vague unease in the situation but not know how to articulate it. The ending was superb. (10 pts)

(4 pts)

Breath
by Colm

The only thing I'm confused about is the appearance being portrayed here. "I dreamed you were grey and shriveled, short of breath and collaring a diamond necklace." Because of this line "and dreamed I could give you my dream." Other than that, this piece is perfect, very powerful, and the title really fits the poem. I was wondering why it was under Misc Poems while at the same time, I think it depicts of adoration and love. (10 pts)

(7 pts)

Special Things
by TerryB

I love the simplicity of this piece as well as its ear-catching rhymes. Those you've mentioned are indeed special things that have been the big thing in our lives; unfortunately they are being taken for granted now. I love the refreshing tone of this poem. (7 pts)

(10 pts)

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HM's:

Morning's gift
by Anthony M

This is a very nice and sweet poem, actually one of the sweetest things I've read today and you should read this to her. It's a beautiful, poetic dedication for all the women out there. (4 pts)

In Mourning #2
by Thomas

Again, this young author has written an effective poem about age and aging. What an imagination. A regular, everyday image of a child on an escalator can bring forth so much. It was a little bit of a forced metaphor, but the writing style was so quiet and resigned that it was quite lovely. The last stanza was made more poignant in its disparity. (10 pts)

Smartly worded. I liked the subtle rhyming of the last stanza - it brought the poem to a rhythmic close. (7 pts)

River Rocks
by Britt

I've been reading this poem for a few weeks and I like the way this author is moving towards the more simple, sweet and unpretentious. 'sink into my fiber. Sunshine soaking into my skin' was a bit cliche, but the second half of the poem was a winner. (4 pts)

My Heart Speaks
by Hribhu Dey

I didn't think the ending was the strongest, but the morsels of inspiration in this poem warranted some recognition. I especially liked the bouquet of letters, and the idea of a heart that "that still vibrates / because someone lives there." (4 pts)

Stunned
by Courageous Dreamer

I was fond of the many different flowers used throughout this piece, it was interesting to see what they writer had chosen, the symbolic means behind each flower was particularly clever. 'Scarlet lilies' intrigued me, I don't think I have ever heard lilies being portrayed as scarlet especially due to the fact that they are a symbol of Chasity, therefore the reader made me look beyond the concept portrayed on the surface. A short piece with a lot of impact. (4 pts)

You Don't Feel Me
by The Poetess

`I thought the emotion was deep within this, I liked how it began with you never, however I felt it was unnecessary to repeat it throughout the poem. I know this was probably done to continue the theme behind the poem but I felt it was evident enough after the first and second stanza. I was quite interested in the symbolism in this poem, using grey for sadness, luggage as 'running away' or an 'escape.' This poem was simple in the way it spoke to the audience which really allowed an individual to relate. It has beautiful word choice and yet it wasn't over the top, therefore the reader could feel as though they too had written such a poem. A lovely read. (7 pts)

I Just Hope
by Yakzzz

This poem was sincere, the pain was evident and I thought the poet used beautiful metaphors to depict emotions. The tone was what caught my attention, elegant, thoughtful and yet it still depicted much sorrow. The imagery was pleasing to my imagination and I found myself reminiscing with the writer. A well written piece that held my interest from start to finish. (10 pts)

Congratulations to all

Loved the poems this week. Congrats guys!

Congrats all

Congrats and thanks for the HM.

Jane you said the correct number of votes were placed but it looks like one judge didn't vote at all, right?

Congratulations! Three well deserving poems. Thanks to the judges and nominators and also the mods for helping with this each week. :]

Britt, good eye. I am waiting on the final judge to PM me back about what poems they voted on. Once I know, I'll add the appropriate votes to poems :)

Okie doke. I read what you said and looked at the votes and thought maybe my eyes were playing tricks on me. They do that from time to time lol

Below is a definition of poem from our own WOTD. Note number two.

Definition:
1. a composition in verse, especially one that is characterized by a highly developed artistic form and by the use of heightened language and rhythm to express an intensely imaginative interpretation of the subject.
2. composition that, though not in verse, is characterized by great beauty of language or expression: a prose poem from the Scriptures; a symphonic poem.
3. something having qualities that are suggestive of or likened to those of poetry: Marcel, that chicken cacciatore was an absolute poem.

Congrats winners & HM's.

Congratulations winners and HM's. :D

While I understand...prose is still poetry whether someone agrees with that or not. I feel like when people complain that a certain type of poetry (prose is a form in essence) isn't poetry that we're all supposed to be writing abab or a specific form for it to be considered poetry.

Well done winners and hm's, some really classy work gracing the front page this week:)

I agree with Bob, and like what he is doing here. With all due respect.

Wouldn't it also be complementary and rewarding if there is an additional thread where the weekly winners get criticized constructively by some members with the proper authority?

In the literary world, aspiring writers/poets actually join contests or even pay in order to be part or accepted into a writer's workshop. And during which, they are able to learn and improve their writing.

When a child achieves his/her first honor award in school. It is nice to give him/her a reward for it, but even better if the parent/guardian encourages more from him by increasing their expectations and so excercising their potential. And petty praises don't necessarily work, always, either. Just ask B.S Skinner.

Of course if people agree with this, it should also be optional for the winners if they'd want to or not.

^^

That has already been tried out. I used to post it weekly for people to discuss positively or negatively with permission of the winners. It got a VERY small turnout, so we stopped posting it and those people just started commenting on the poems instead :)

Oh. that's sad. Commenting on the poems is very different from discussing them. But I guess the activitiy of members is important for it to be successful.

That's how we find out that the diameter of one's purpose of writing leans more fortheir subjective selves. Poetry is a far bigger art than that.

But I do understand them, for no lamer analogy: most people would rather be credited as a STAR of their neighborhood basketball playground than the more painful, powerful, yet rewarding road of actually working professional.

And that goes on the way here as well, only a few maybe desires to be a real poet, most of us take it as a treasured hobby. No biggie.

Thanks for the votes and well done to other winners and honourable mentions

I think a discussion about winners poems would be a good idea. Whoever wants to do it can, whoever doesnt want to doesnt have to. I know participation mightnt be good but whoever wants to do it can do so even if its only a few people, it doesnt have to affect anybody else.

I agree that it would be beneficial to discuss poems and educational for all to enable the writer to give his/her opinion or rationale too.

"Oh. that's sad. Commenting on the poems is very different from discussing them. But I guess the activity of members is important for it to be successful."

Absolutely. Often after the mods take these suggestions seriously, there is very little turn out.

I can imagine; it is even possible for turmoil to occur.

But if ever, you moderators, gauge the interest of the members, I hope it wouldn't be much harm to try it out again? Only when you guys think its safe.

I just think its important because it could give more emphasis to the weekly winners, and it would inspire the young or new writers joining the site. If the discussions/pseudo-workshops become successful and productive, more writers would learn and strive their way towards the top.

And yes, like what Colm said, it must be voluntary/optional.

I think the discussion of what makes a poem is an interesting one. To me, it comes down to careful and deliberate use of language and its arrangement. Poems basically seem to be distilled, essential clusters of moments and phrases that are expressed more clearly through their economy of words than they could be in a longer form. I think all of these poems do this, in varying ways and degrees.

Of course, I suppose that's only a certain kind of poem. Epics probably wouldn't hold up to that definition. I guess the subjectivity of "poetry" is one of the things that makes it fun.

Discussing what makes a poem, is ever changing-like scienctific revolution- and could barely fit in a book, with numerous anthologies.

But an easy suggestion, however, is reading the poem as if its an artistic (i hope so) film. The stanzas that jump from one to the next, are scenes - do they connect in a way, does the ending revive a particular event in one of the scenes? Does the score or tone of the poem carry an elegant interaction with the characters, events, or plot of the poem? Is the dialogue, words and lines, convincing, and moving (without being cliche or exaggerated). ETC.

And most importantly a signficant element of what makes a poem, a poem, is its being poetic. Redundant? Yes, because attaching words like "imagery", "metaphor", "transition", "form" etc does not give it justice.

Rilke spoke these words:

"Ah, poems amount to so little when you write them too early in your life. You ought to wait and gather sense and sweetness for a whole lifetime, and a long one if possible, and then, at the very end, you might perhaps be able to write ten good lines. For poems are not, as people think, simply emotions (one has emotions early enough) - they are experiences."
- Rainer Maria Rilke, [For the Sake of a Single Poem, The Notebooks of Malte Laurids Brigge (1910)

We emphasize EXPERIENCE in poetry. And this is not just our ordinary definition of experience (as being quantitative). Of course we've all felt that nearly grand moment in our lives, and they may objectively vary in degrees: a simple picture, a view of a beautiful landscape atop a mountain, the sound of your dog breathing, etc. (A film can be about nothing, yet be so beautiful. A poem can do so as well, just up to the writer)

But the experience is very hard to communicate in words; and this is the challenge for a poet. I don't believe people who say "I know how you felt" when reading an overused line like "She is the sunrise of my heart" - ha. There is no shared experience there.

I want to mirror your image to its fullest perfection,
never be blind or too old
to uphold your weighty wavering reflection.
- I Am Much Too Alone in this World, Yet Not Alone, Rainer M. Rilke.

^ something like this, however, connects both reader and audience to a specific experience, almost subjective, that is unbelievable. If everytime I swallow feels like a punch to the throat, describes one's sorethroat. Then the reader must be able to imagine (not just the scene) but the experience of it. The writer must allow his work to be accessible to an audience.

If the poet manages to have the reader "experience" his own for even just a single moment, then I do believe that poet has done its job well. But that is not all what poetry does.

Anyway, I've been bragging. I apologize for shifting the main topic of this thread. I can post this in another if anyone wishes...

Sometimes a poem will grab you like the poem tornado and the inspiration to share has a deeper meaning than a shallow mind can grasp

Mary Esma Williams was born in Holden, Missouri, on January 26, 1882. She moved to Osawatomie, Kansas, at seven years old

Missouri is the show me State ,but it is now in the STATE OF EMERGENCY
Joplin miners were unfamiliar with Colorado mining methods and required frequent instructions. Pit bosses began saying, "That man is from Missouri. You'll have to show him

Are you a prophet Sibyllene?

Only classically, Mike : )

"A film can be about nothing, yet be so beautiful. A poem can do so as well,"

^I like this. I think it's the poets who can take moments that could have been mundane and make them breathe.

Take another little piece of my heart

'Being an intellectual creates a lot of questions and no answers. "
Janis Joplin

BTW ..CONGRATULATIONS WINNERS I shall ponder these poems slowly

"as for critiquing a poem, seriously folks, there's far too much ass kissing on here and people keep making the same bad mistakes over and over within their writes, and why should they try to improve, they keep getting all these 5's and "Oh this is outstanding" rhetoric."

I think it's a difference of opinion, that's all. I consider Kiko's poem a poem. You don't. Who can step in and tell us, factually, whether it is or it isn't?

"why do we need permission to give positive but harsh feedback, when you are nominated you're saying this is my work, I want to represent this poetry site"

It's not about permission for feedback since you can offer that in comments on the poem. It's asking permission to deconstruct and scrutinize someone's poem with other poets in an open forum. I can understand how someone might not want their poem spotlighted for debate, because after all, nobody asks for their poetry to make the front page. Every time you submit a poem to PnQ, it is subjected to potential nomination and a win...

I read your comment on Kiko's poem, which led me to the conclusion that his poem is the one you are referencing.

Yes I seriously think it's a poem, so by your standards, I don't know what a poem is. I won't take the time to explain why I think it's a poem since you "don't even care."

The poets who won, won by fair judgment from a mixed group of judges. Can't please everyone I guess.

Submitting your poetry to PnQ does not mean you are casting it to the vultures to ravage. There's no harm in asking someone if you can post their poem in a thread for people to discuss if it was worthy of a win.
I think, at this point, it would be fitting for you to ask Kiko if you can make a separate thread?

I think we should reinstate this "weekly winner critique" thread... it sounds like a valuable and interesting topic.
In order for the site to progress, the users, therefore poets, must progress. Poetry does not exist in a bubble, and while I love the judges for using their very attuned skills to select winning poems, it would be nice to see a Weekly Winners thread that consisted of more than just congratulations. We can collaborate on our work here, can't we? Aren't we seeking to learn? Perhaps the greatest prize of winning would be the genuine input and (hopefully) growth you got from being critiqued by everyone.
None of this is to say I don't love all the poems that won. The poem (I believe) you are talking about strikes me as poetic gold, and I'd like to point out that I've read countless published poems by well known poets that have very successful narrative or prose styles, and to discount that style as "not poetry" seems about as silly as saying a haiku is too short to be worthwhile.

Bob, arguing over whether something is a poem or not is rather the same as arguing over whether something is art or not. In short, there can be no winner, since poetry is as much subject to thought and interpretation as art is.
To decide that a particular form doesn't trigger some deeper poetic sensibilities in yourself is a different thing entirely. You don't like this format, and I think rhyming poems are absurd things that generally lack meaning. But to classify one as poetry and the other as something else would be ridiculous.
Also, have you ever read a free-verse novel? The work itself is often prose, but I would consider it poetry for the presentation and the direction of meaning.

I don't have time to host a critique for weekly winners. I am very occupied with other mod stuff, but if someone wants to host it... put your name up and let's see what people think.

"That would be great if we would have someone, who is actually qualified to mold our minds..."

Like who?

Http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/author.html?id=467467

Like him :D

Kiko is someone I know personally, have known him for years. Don't hold your breath waiting for him to reply to this petty stuff. He is one of the best poets I have ever met and like someone else stated earlier on, poetry is an art form and therefore it will not be so, cannot be so that all people will be able to appreciate all that is written, not even by famous writers;)

You are twisting my words around, Bob. I said Kiko will most likely not even respond because he finds it petty. That is how I think he will perceive it, because he is a mature man, he is well known in the poetry world, on various sites and has had lots of recognition for what he is able to create. I strongly suspect he couldn't care less about someone not agreeing on his win this week..could be wrong, I am not a mind-reader:0)

I think it's a great poem, he won because I nominated him, as far as I remember I was the only one that did and the jury saw what I saw. Kiko did not ask to win, I did not ask for him to win either, it is up to the judges to decide whether his poem is front page material. So what you are really saying is here, it that you disagree with the judges. I think it is in bad taste to air you opinion about the fairness of a win in a congratulatory thread...after all..this is just your opinion, no more, no less.

No one needs to justify his or her reasons for liking a work of art, you either do, or you don't. period.

Poetry, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. I don't recall either Bob or his strap-on buddy ever commenting or critiquing any of my other poems. These poems run the gamut from classic metered forms to unconventional free-form styles and everything in between.

The irony here is that I do belong to a poetry workshop - led by someone who publishes poetry for a living, and attended by many excellent (and published) poets. When I read this particular piece to the group, it was roundly and fairly critiqued. Not one person, however, considered it to be an "essay" a "journal entry" a "glamor magazine article," or anything other than a poem.

Oh Bob. Lol. I guess I didn't answer your question, good catch there.
No, I don't think what you posted is a poem. It clearly wasn't written as a poem, and it doesn't read like one. Sure, I agree that parts of Kiko's work may read like prose, but the overall effect is one of poetry. You ask what makes it a poem? I think it's a poem because the idea is cleverly portrayed and spaced in such a way that the key points stick out. It's a poem because the effect of the writing wouldn't be as powerful if it was written in prose form. It's a poem because it uses visual language and conveys a strong emotion. And it's a poem because it was written to be a poem. But all of that might be unimportant to you. Which is fine, because like I said, your question of whether this is poetry or not is unanswerable. Only you can make that distinction for yourself, and since you already have, nothing I or anyone else says is going to sway your opinion.

I posted up the latest comments/votes from the last judge if anyone cares to take a peek. There are three new HM's :)

Bob, do you want me to explain why I think it's a poem or do you not want me to explain why it's a poem? First you say you do, then you say you don't, now you do again. Make up your mind.

Jane

Ah Bob, bless you for making these bloody congrats threads more interesting. They are normally so dull and routine. I fully support anybody's right to discuss the judges' comments and critique poems in a public forum. I don't know why the judges bother giving painstaking comments if noone is to actually agree or disagree with them. I think that's the main point in having a poetry discussion forum- discussing each other's work. The mods have tried to promote this by trialling separate threads where a member's poem is workshopped, or the winning poems are critiqued. None of this has worked independently. I don't see any reason why this can't naturally be executed in these 'congrats' threads. Bah to hurt feelings. The poem is public material. It's important for any poet to stand by their work, listen to feedback and promote their own understanding.

As to Bob trying to tell poets whether their work is a poem or not- that's laughable. FREE
EEEEEE
EE
verse. In my mind, a poem can be anything where normal language has been pushed to a certain degree of X. If it's an essay with line breaks, fine. But what makes it a poem is HOW the author chose to break the lines to cause an impact. Even if it doesn't have line breaks, it is not automatically disqualified as a poem either. It depends what the words are made of.

Yet, in addition to enjambment, Kiko's poem used heaps of other techniques that are typically used in poetry- metaphor, analogy, even irony. Overall, it was an observation that many make, delivered with singularity, emotionally nerved, and encased with words that were not laboured. It was not perfect, but it was good, and it was definitely a poem to me.

In 'normal language' it would be something like- "It's really quite sad the way all those people's lives in Syria are held so cheaply by the media. They might as well be items on a shopping list. Even Jesus was treated the same way on this sign on the way to work. "

Lol...this is funny. Congrats all :]

I do agree with one thing Bob has said - that the moderating on this site is terrible.

I don't know of any other poetry site that allows people to openly bash someone's poem. An honest, thoughtful critique is one thing, but there has been none of that here, only taunting and insults. I think this thread is a disgrace.

I agree with Sir Pearl, Kiko, don't let this thread get to ya, matey! We're interested in you and what you represent. I think Bob could have been a bit more respectful in his opinion, but that's just trivial crap that should be ignored. I'd be interested in you telling us why your poem is a poem, straight from the poet's mouth. Get involved.

"So basically you say it's a poem because of the formatting, in which case anything can be a poem if formatted by stanzas, right?.......so basically any article, news or otherwise can be a poem, wow"

Nah, I didn't say that. You can read my post again.

And I've already had a discussion with you in the past on lines that end with 'the'. The diminished ending of a line could be the very thing that is used as a ploy to make the next line pick it up and tighten the whole thing again, throughout the entire length. It's a very effective tool to place weight on the next line, suspend its motive, or add sudden meaning to the previously deduced line, but only if the line is good enough to bear it.

I think the personal rules you impose on free verse poetry rather oppose its ideals and scope.