Weekly Winners - 9/5

Here are the winners & HM's for this week! Special thank you to the members who comment, read, nominate and vote on these poems, and the judges for tirelessly going through each and every poem nominated to choose their top 3. Congrats to all those posted in here today! :)

Teacup
by Melpomene

"I found this to be an engaging read; I really got into it. The zoning in on the teacup and using such detail was well done, and the metaphor was similarly well done. So much was fitted into the time it took to take a sip of coffee, the lingering thoughts of a preoccupied mind. The writer avoided cliche too, and I felt that the piece was focused, never straying off on a tangent. I would like to know why the capitalization was used in the second last stanza, I probably missed the significance of it. Immediately after reading the last line I thought to myself 'wouldn't it be interesting if that last line wasn't there.' I'm not sure if that would have worked, keeping the truth to yourself or implying that you were still looking for the truth, or merely just teasing the reader, but it would have been interesting. Having said that, the end as it is works fine, and brings the poem together well and gives a sense of journey/epiphany." (10)

"This poet always writes of such different ideas and has spectacular metaphors, this piece is no different. Reading her poetry is like watching a piece of art come to life, bit by bit. I liked the slight repetition riddled throughout, and I loved the ending where it turned into something completely unexpected (for me). The writer did a great job at placing real art pieces into her poem and gave it a fresh feeling. The idea of the teacup was different and creative, I love the play with it throughout the whole poem." (7)

"It's always been my pleasure to read this poet's work, the vocabulary she uses makes it very interesting; this poem in particular really stood out, full of thought provoking metaphors, and the flow was truly on another level. The story that was told was filled by emotions, really impressive, and I wouldn't have expected a better heart breaking ending." (7)

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A poem for mama
by Yaki love

"This is the piece that would make you shed so many tears and also darkle your atmosphere. It is based upon a typical real life story of a mother vs. young daughter. But the way it was written makes you speechless. Describing her mom as the 'antagonist', the writer takes off with a quite calm tone, and suddenly, you get opposed by the atmosphere which turned so gloomy that you can feel the tense and hear the sobs of the girl. From the daughter's perspective, we could know that the mother acted as her friend - 'protagonist'. But in fact, all what the mother did was the opposite. I really fell in love with, 'swore to dim my shine' - it made me feel that the writer is shouting and crying at the same time; it's so rhythmic. But then, the tone volume becomes lower (paving the way to say sorry) as it appears between the two brackets (for you were harsh at times, mama). And what enticed me the most is that the abbreviation 'dna' is not capitalized; it made me imagine how the girl was back then: ashamed and embarrassed to carry the traits of her mother. We also know that the young daughter became a lady and is now sorry for what she has done because she, too, was at times that kind of rebellious teens who wouldn't appreciate what their mothers are doing to keep them alive. Still, she knew 'late' why she should value her mother's deeds. (and I admire the strength/ of your backbone, /and the history behind / those wrinkles maybeline no /longer hides..) - a standing ovation here because this stanza really hits home for me! It says so much, and I think it's enough to say: I'm sorry, I was mistaken, I love you... through these lines only. They express tokens of emotions. 'backbone' gave vividness to the write and 'maybeline' made it current. (I was the one that/stole your shine,mama. ) - now this is amazing! I really like the state of contradiction between the past and the present notions of the daughter. She finally realized what she wasn't able to see through spoiled, immature, teenage eyes. And it was moving when she assured the readers that she became a grown up now: (but today I take off /this teenage lipstick , /from my lips...). With so many real, yet, so vivid images, the writer inspired me and made my eyes tear. Another applause for this: (I apologize / for believing, /that bread magically /appeared on the table) - I myself used to believe that it does appear magically, lol! A penned ending also! And though it was somehow late, the sorry really did its job. Be thankful, my dear poetess, be thankful.. Your mother forgives you. I can feel it :S And I'd really like to see a sequel for this poem. You hear me? A sequel. But, from the mother's vantage point! EXCELLENT :D" (10)

"For starters, I'd love to say that I'm totally at loss of words, This was such a beautiful idea transferred to words to make a wonderful written master piece, a very nice tribute to show the appreciation a daughter has for her mother, The Poem itself was marvelous, I Wasn't sure where you were headed with your words until I got to the twist, and it was heartfelt all the way to the end of the poem, the part where you described how you thought bread magically appeared On the table tells me exactly what kind of a poet you are, a creative one, well penned, and a memorable read, god bless." (10)

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Driving to your house
by Abracadabra

"A different, perfect kind of love poem. You get wrapped up in the story telling, the imagery and the sensations each line creates. I love the descriptive pieces, and the slight questioning at the end with 'probably'. Typically I don't think the addition of such words like 'probably' is a good play in poetry, but this poet definitely places her words carefully, and it gave it the perfect kind of tone." (10)

"This, like so many great poems, was a poem about the ordinary, but it was far from boring. We see a real glimpse into the poets observant mind from something so simple as driving along the street. It isn't done in a blatant way either, it doesn't try too hard. There's a unedited sense that this is the poets ordinary voice and thoughts on paper. There is throughout the poem, from the poet to the people sitting on the porches, a sense that life is there to be observed, pondered upon in a relaxed, almost carefree way. A sense that little events happen outside your doorstep every day. The imagery is good, I don't feel its overdone but there's enough for the reader to get a clear picture of the scene and fill in the gaps themselves. A poem with surprising substance." (7)

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HONORABLE MENTIONS:

UnSkull
by Jordan

"Well, this is what I call a perfect write, I can't imagine something more descriptive and metaphoric than it, this writer pulled me in from the very first line, I felt I'm so drawn in as if everything around me just disappeared and I started to imagine his thoughts. He put some original metaphors, he described everything about the skull, he worded it perfectly, in brief he did an awesome job with this" (10 points)

"This poem scared me the first few times I read it to be honest. It had such raw, dark images creeping into my mind, the kind that you feel with nightmares. It had me with the word 'gooseflesh'. That word, every time I read this piece, sticks out as if it were written in bold. Sometimes it's the little things in a poem that make it great, this time 'round it was definitely the emotion you made me feel, the dark imagery depicted, and the forever interesting vocabulary." (4)

Uncovering
by The Poetess

"I am really fond by the simplicity of the ideas and complexity of the emotions because you'd get to feel some anger, agony, sadness, depression.. and other intermixed contradictory emotions through ideas of great volume. The poetess here captures the attention of the reader with so many vivid and beautifully worded images. This journey against the raging emotions she has poured and the pen and punctuations strikes would just inflame your senses to an extent that you drown after reading the first penned three stanzas: I am in need of real love. I was stopped by this. All what she said before was because she wanted to find 'love'? - quite creative and impressive. Pulling off with an angry and sad tone, she shocks you when she finally gives up on this buzz she's making. The tone seemed weary in many places, but then it gets so desperate, on the verge of surrendering: I am in a desperate need of whatever called love. Amazing. Amazing. That is a double post! Amazing! Now, tripled!" (7)

"I'm really amazed at what this poet have achieved over the past few months, the work and Effort she had to put in to master such a level of beautifully portraying such images in the readers mind, this was absolutely well penned, filled and packed with emotions, and The use of simple language made it even more effective, Flawless; in short, I fell in love with her defying tone though out the whole poem." (4)

Death
by Meena Krish

"This writer is by all means way so talented, I really can't imagine how she could manage to mix the two hard forms together. It is for sure challenging and venturous to try a form, but Meena didn't only try one, she did two in one poem and both of them were truly hard. I've never seen such a successful attempt on this site and I think this piece should be a winner. Let me now speak about the content of it, she described her thought perfectly, I loved the word choice that was smart and strong, the darkness behind it, as well, and what interested me the most was the flow, whereas we can see that each line flows so easily. A winner in my book." (7)

Had they only been moths drawn to an artificial light
by Gavin

"I sense that this poem is about growing up, although I wouldn't be surprised if it was meant to represent something else. In my reading, it has quite a pessimistic ending; young people falling into the abyss of adult life and lamenting the loss of innocence that is too late to ever reclaim. And with these things, the value of it isn't known until it is lost. I like the use of 'had only they,' it sets the lamenting tone and the reader gets the feeling it isnt going to end well. There is a sense of inevitability that the 'moths' will be drawn to the light, which could represent the big city, fame, etc. Even though it might be safer to stay quietly in the dark. Taking the 'light' as a metaphor for the world, the poet wants the world to be different; unvibrant, and essentially in the end a plain admission of the wish for it to not be what it really is. Expectations will let you down, nothing is rosy as it seems. For this reason I found the poem quite sad, but it is also deep and interesting, and certainly quite a well written piece in my book." (4)

"This poem has a great potential, I read it about three times and couldn't help but vote for it, I liked some expressions like saying a mind anchored in make-shift habits or 'the emblazoned countenance' I almost liked everything about it, some punctuation here and there and this write would be perfect, in all good job." (4)

Girl and a Gum Tree
by Melpomene

"I congratulate this writer for creating such a creative piece. I know it's a little bit hard to write from a different vantage point, for one needs to be totally in place of him/her/it to capture all the senses. But the poetess here did an amazing job in her club contest. First, the title draws you, and when you read you keep enjoying every other line more and more. This write was perfect in every aspect: flow, wording, and images. It was very creative to write from the perspective of a loving pet (it seemed here to be a dog, right?). Every image felt real with a sprinkle of light humor (skin being sloshed like a swamp; I really like this). There isn't anything to comment on, except that it's perfectly written. AMAZING job." (4)

Congratulations to all the winners and honorable mentions. Well done to everyone.

Congrats to all! Thanks for the HM. Also, just need to point something out:

"This poem scared me the first few times I read it to be honest. It had such raw, dark images creeping into my mind, the kind that you feel with nightmares. It had me with the word 'gooseflesh'."

As a fan of horror and the macabre, that particular comment means a whole lot to me. I'm really grateful! So a million thanks to you, whoever you are. :D

Congrats all! :)

Congrats to you guys!!

Thanks for the HM and amazing pieces this week congrats everyone!!!!! :D

Amazing poetry as always guys
<3

A-M-A-Z-I-N-G
all :)

Congrats all!

Thank you for the HM and congratulations to all the winners.

Congrats everyone!

We should have 4 winners this week.. JORDANS POEM!

Well donee guys :) alllll well deserved, amazing picks, great tastes!!

well deserved everyone :]

Congratulations poets.
Way to go new judges.
Thanks for posting, Joe.

We should have 4 winners this week.. JORDANS POEM!

^^^^

I AGREE!!!!!!!!

GRRRRRRRR :@@@@@

Congrats!

Thank you all & thanks to the new judges.

Congrats winners & HM's. I adored a lot of the reads this week and I must say I am glad I wasn't judging. Too many good ones to pick from.

Oh & to the judge who was curious as to why I capitalized in the second last staza, they are titles of famous artworks, hope that makes more sense now :)

Gavin, I've been watching your work lately and you're really something special. Actually everyone in TC has been watching your work lately. You're too young to be so good!
Happy to see you're getting the recognition you deserve, hun ;) Keep writing.

Jane, I'm with you all the way on this one.

Thanks, everyone! Welcome, new judges (especially the one who wrote the analysis essay on Yaki's poem...most enthusiastic!). Congrats to the other winners and HMs! Indeed, if Gavin had scored a few more points, he would have made it to the front page spot this week... the idea of his poem above mine is most pleasurable.

Throwing this thought out there - posting a link along with the poems so that those of us who don't catch it on the nominations page during the week or don't have ability to see or find the poems, would be able to check them out? I know I hadn't seen Gavin's poem during the week so I had to go searching for it on my own and thought a link would have been nice to have. I know you can easily search for the poem through the search box, but a link seem so much easier if it would be possible we could start adding this each week. Just an idea, wondering if anyone else agrees?

Definitely an option. It would be nice to have ready links.

However, I'm not sure if it's better for the members to do more work by searching for the HM's in the poem search box or for the judges/Joe to do more work by copy-pasting links to all the HM's each week.

Of course if the judges/Joe are willing, I have no objection :)

If you copy and paste the title into the search poems area it'll pop right up for ya. It doesn't take much time at all...

Of course it doesn't, but sometimes like this title, it is too long and it doesn't work. So you have to take a little part of it, which really doesn't always guarantee that it's going to pop up. It was just an idea anyways.

Congrats winners and Hm's!

You can find him in my favorites, Tempssss. ;)

Congrats winners & HMs