Engaged and continplating a threesome...

Hi my fiance and I have been together since high school (about 10 years) and he has always known that I am bi and has also always been ok with it, mostly because he thought it ment a threesome.
Me being bi has never been an issue until recently when I have started having really strong wants for women in the bedroom. I havent been with a women in such a long time and i feel as though our sex life is suffering because of it because I am starting to get bored. I brought it up and we both argreed that it cheating for me to be with a women alone so a threesome is the only opition.
Im not sure i want to do it. I still havent lost all my baby weight from my son so i am not so secure with myself, so to let another women in our bed i thnk would only ruin our relationship. On the other hand sometimes I think it might be fun. i just dont want to lose him over a one time threesome that is my fault for bringing up in the first place.
I'm sorry Im rambling, i just dont know what to do. he says that its all up to me and he wont have any say in when, where and with whom we do this with and he also says that we dont need to do it all and that its all in my hands but i know its every mans fantasy and I almost feel like if we just do it once it might be out of my system.

UGH i need help!

Hmmm well about the baby weight thing: honey be proud you look the way you do after a baby!!! I know it may not be the best or like you were before but be proud that you are the mother of a child and embrace the little bit of extra weight!
Ok so the threesome thing... you are getting bored with your sex life??? Then you need some kind of spice!! If you arent comfortable with a threesome then try new positions and other things and see if it makes it any better! You miss being with a girl?? Hmmm well if you both consider it cheating for you to be with a girl and he is expecting a threesome at some point, just wait until you feel comfortable with it! If you arent comfortable with it then dont do it! He cant force you to do anything and tell him how you feel. Since you guys have been together for so long then I dont think it will ruin the relationship and he seems like an understanding guy. Just do what you feel comfortable doing! :)

You know i really tried being ok with my baby weight but its really hard not only with the socitety these days but also looking at old pictures all the time and people saying how different i looked before the baby. that gets depressing. and we have tried new postions and we have tried toys and everything but at the end of the day i just miss the tender touch of a female once in awhile. Im not even saying i want to have sex with a girl but even a drunk make out would help me right now. I will say that this is the most i have thought about having a threesome during our entire relationship so i think this means im starting to warm up to it, im just worried he is going to either enjoy it too much and want it all the time or he is going to miss being single OR tell me i need to lose some more wiehgt. Now he isnt that type of guy or anything but thats where my insecurities are and that is what is keeping me from doing it.

Threesomes ruined two of my friends' relationships and although they handled the situation a lot different im just worried that same thing can happen to us.

1st: ok never compare your relationship with your friends' relationships.... there is a huge difference between them!!
2nd: If he tells you that you have to lose weight, STRAIGHTEN HIM OUT!!!!!! I'd smack him...
3rd: Old pictures are the past... it may be depressing but you get to look forward to raising a kid! there is nothing more precious than that in the world!
4th: I doubt he would miss being single. He loves you enough to be there for you for 10 years, he's the father of the kid and you guys are engaged! HE LOVES YOU HONEY! :D
5th: Ok so missing the touch of a woman, understandable.. I'm bi too. If it is what you want then do what you wont but dont forget to include him ;) It'll spark something and just talk about you thinking that he'll excpect it more... yes that is what you need to do! He loves you and he will understand, if not then well, he'll understand! :)

I've never seen a couple have a threesome and maintain a relationship. Just my first thought.

To me, either way, it's still cheating. You're lusting after another woman..even if it's not a specific person. It sounds like either you're unhappy with yourself and think something/one new and different will make you feel better, or you're bored with your guy. You said you're bored already, but is it because you're mentally check out, or because he isn't putting forth an effort?

Have you talked to him about how you're feeling?

A threesome is one thing, craving another women is another. YOu speak as though being with another women would satisfy this need you have. Just so happens to be something more then a few guys would be ok with.

In theory if this came about by discussion I'd have a different opinion. I myself am Bi, but the day I entered into a serious relationship is the day I forget about both sexes. Being Bi doesn't give you a card to use as an exucse to want to be with 'someone'. I strongly advise against you doing this, your want for women should not trump being faithful nor should it be an excuse to think it's ok to be with someone esle.

Again if this came about in a mutual discussion it'd be different but as soon as I read this " I have started having really strong wants for women in the bedroom. "

A huge red flag went up. You need to seriously evaluate why it is a threesome would be something you're interested in. Would this be a one time thing? Would there be rules? Would it be someone you know? Would it be someone that you were intimate with in your past? Would you ensure if they were a stranger you'd get them tested before bringing them into your bed?

I'm Bi but my yearning for women isn't there. Being Bi to me is about loving the person not the sex. So as such I don't yearn for a specific sex, what I yearned for was a person I could love, and love for a life time.

Yes threesomes have been discussed but not out of yearning, out of curiosity. We decided there are far to many factors that go into bringing someone else into our marital bed. This type of stuff can complicate things especially to those who don't think about all the consequences before hand.

"Me being bi has never been an issue until recently when I have started having really strong wants for women in the bedroom. I havent been with a women in such a long time and i feel as though our sex life is suffering because of it because I am starting to get bored." This speaks more to your relationship then your sex life my dear. I feel as though you're using it as an excuse when the real reasons are hidden. Getting bored with sex? I've been with my husband for 7 years... it still has yet to get boring. It is what you make it. I strongly suggest you both work on your relationship if you feel that you're sex life and ultimately love life is suffering then you need to seriously think WHY that is. If it's because of the lack of another women in your bed then I really think you need to reconsider such a huge commitment as marriage. Getting bored with sex / relationships / the person your with often leads to cheating. To me this threesome would ultimatley be a scapegoat for you to enjoy another 'person' in your bed.

You really have a lot of thinking to do. This has far more to do with bringing another person into your bed. You both have some working to do, perhaps you more then him if you're starting to feel bored... Think about how that would sound if your fiance said that to you. What happens when threesomes become boring? What happens if your fiance likes it better with another women and then breaks the rules and sees her one on one. Is he truly ready for a threesome?

Biggest question: Is your relationship truly ready for a threesome? I really really doubt it from how you've explained things.

The grass isn't always greener on the other side. To me you're just burying the underlining issues of your boredom... I don't think this is the proper way to help you're sex life/ relationship... Marriage counseling seems like the thing you should be seeking out.

If it's becoming boring stop having sex for a while... Sex isn't everything. Sometimes you'd be surprised what a little waiting can do for you both.

I've been thinking about this and this is what i think: you're afraid of committing. You're engaged and you're realizing that you're going to be with this man for the rest of your life, no other guys, no other girls and you want to get that one last fling in before you say "I do". A lot of people get cold feet and feel like this... is it this maybe???