Noura's contest babies. Winksssssssssssssss. Round Two!

I wanted first to share a joke that made me crack up so hard but then thought it was silly so... Welcome to round 2, everyone! I bet it's even more fun than the first. We will have 3 eliminated pieces, three judges and three rules. How consistent!

Some are going to get out of their comfort zone, and I like that. For my part, I love it when someone challenges me especially when it's something I always envy people for having. I hope you guys will see this round as interesting as I do.

This round is about snapshots!

You will live a moment...a special moment where you can see things, random, beautiful, unexpected things and hear sounds, different sounds, vague sounds. You'll feel a touch or smell the perfume of someone faraway. You will turn this moment into a snapshot and write a small little piece about it. You're free whether you want it to be a moment between two lovers or if you want...you can pen something dark down which is a challenge by itself or even a moment amidst mother nature. It's all up to YOU.

Now the rules:

1- DON'T use these words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it'. And if you do repeat three of them thrice, you're out!

2- DO incorporate, at least, one god or goddess, or at the very least, a small reference to mythology.

3- DON'T write more than 70 words.

---

Here you can submit only ONE piece. NO editing, guys, please!

Have fun, muahahaha.

Edited: I always forget about the deadline. July the 18th.

(Y) COOL

Neat! I love the word limit and the mythology part, that is so clever!

The challenge is on :]

70 words?
This is going to be interesting.

This is AMAZING!!
:-D

Good job for round two Noura..

70 words?
That will be a fair accomplishment for several.

Thank you all!

Just so you know, guys, not exactly 70. You can write less but not more.

WHAT!

Only 2 poems in until now! Wtf, people!

How many poems so far?

Oh God.

Totally forgot about thissssss

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dayummmmmmmm
I'll write it fast now

Really sorry, Noura

xx

I was going to post the poems. Hurry up, will give you 2 hours!

DONE!

GOOD!

I typed these entries by myself. And on my phone. Because the situation here in Syria is pitiful. No phone lines, no wireless Internet and...I am suffocated. God, I just can't stop being too sacrificing. :P

Anyway, here are the entries, every piece has a number, please learn it by heart, when the judges' comments will be posted, I won't write titles, just numbers.

Thanks everyone! Enjoyed skimming fastly through them!

Entry number 1

Title: A Blue Rose Petal's Falling

The rustic Old Barn's groan
Creeps inside a Cowboy
Rope's stil, hanging there
Loosely coiled and tied
I can feel goosebumps
Upon my fleshy neck
And hear a faint gasping
Smell of stale Choking breath
"God, Bless her Soul"
Whose countenance
Has dropped deep in shame
Each time those rotten doors
Open, my eyes snap shut
Asking, "why Judith Hayens"

---

Entry number 2

Title: Into the future of January

My hands sink into his chest with diamonds
grasping at heartstrings so I can pocket
a piece along my hips.

January sighed while love held me above confidence,
never intending to drop me.

seconds of dawn broke, darkness dusted in my palms,
bridges were crossed barefooted and selfless.

If my lover were Janus,
he'd know what the future intended to deposit,
we wouldn't have to
waste time knowing the truth.

---

Entry number 3

Title: Stygian Crypt- The Punished

With eyelids closed,
I picture
aphotic eyes
succumbing to a Stygian crypt;
dry flesh with pale skin.

Women and men with
manacles made of spears
rowing their way through
the River Styx.

When Hades greets them-
the obfuscated spirits,
the infernal gates shut down
in blaze

And they all SCrEaM.

---

Entry number 4

Title: Her Mercy

I remember the waters
pooling and sucking
at her feet. Frolicking

against the sun's
fleeting orange. I rowed
towards her skylark
song - empty
thighs,

beckoning, beckoned

tasted the ocean's misery
on a flickering
tongue, nipples pressed
against beard-

ravenous, merciless
pounding-

forgetful of the splinters
from these terrible oars,

doomed to die by tide
of Poseidon-

'Oh, siren -take me
and row me,
row me to death.'

---

Entry number 5

Title: Intoxicated

Golden rays cascading
down your hair, caressing
every inch of your face,
stopping at that young smile
framed by your lips.

For a brief moment in time
our hands touched and our
eyes locked. I inhale, and its
fresh, spicy, woody .. the air
surrounding you.

Like fully choreographed
footsteps we were meant
to meet crossroads.

.
.
.

Serendipity .. !? Perhaps.

Standing on opposite sidewalks
Zeus can hear the storms
of our thunderous beats,
despite the chaos in between.

Intoxicated, I stood there
breathless. "Who is this man?"

---

Entry number 6

Title: Untitled

A dreary odd thirty-seven weeks drifted
in solitude; I was incarcerated - as if
it was meant to lead to maturity. The
notion of escape lingered on my tongue
with a pungent taste.

One fortnight passed, and on the eve
of a sunrise - the voice of the great lord
Ares screamed out for me. I lunged toward his gift of
freedom; naked and bloody,I let out a piercing war cry.

---

Entry number 7

Title: Untitled

8:40:00 a.m.

I have spent years
in counting -
making my breaths count.

a matter of seconds -
an intuition mounting my nostrils -
a whisper beating against my tied neck -

For the last time, I called her.

I knew it would take her
6 minutes and 30 seconds
to pick up the phone
she deserted because of me.

8:46:30 a.m.

Skies fell;
the 50th floor
was going on -50;

September 11, 2001
mimicked Ares.

---

Entry number 8

Title: Divinity

When I raised my hands,
she came tenderly, bathing me
in light and scents of yesterdays,
as the drum expanded the night
into mandalas, seeding the stars
with majestic words.

Diana and Selene
drew down the Moon
and gave me her radiance,
dressing infinity, touching
the sands of the universe
and every moving and unmoving
creation with kindness.

Life burst into being,
searing my divine eyes forever:
I was blessed.

Woah, this is the first time I get enough entries without begging. Please guys, if anything is wrong with your poem, PM me. A comma is as small as an ant on the phone. Ughhhh. Oh and the judges' comments will be posted on Sunday morning.

Edited: I'm on my pc again guys! Feel free to PM with anything. I am all ready now.

I'm anxious to see the results.

There is a judge who hasn't given me their comments/raes yet. I am just wating.

I really love this round.

Hey guys! Sorry for being late. Here is what I have got. :)

First judge's comments and rates:

Poem #1-

COMMENT:
This was a neat read, I just would suggest more punctuation at the end of your lines. The beginning was intriguing, but I don't think you gave a specific enough detail of this one image....for instance I couldn't tell what mythological reference was used. I don't understand why "Choking" was capitalized, and the beginning of each line doesn't necessarily have to be capitalized unless it is a new thought starting on that line. You conveyed the eeriness here well in such few words, I can picture that hope hanging there and the echo of "God bless her soul", but I wasn't clear enough of who it was. This was clever though.

VOTING:
Word count: 60 words = 10/10
Creativity: 7/10
Meaning (Content): 6/10
Mythology Ref.: No God or Goddess name or reference, was not clear = 0/10
Pronoun Count: Did not use listed words more than twice = 10/10

TOTAL = 43/50

Poem #2-

COMMENT:
You really brought this piece to life with the beauty and abstraction you used here, adding it in with parts that really made me be put in awe. This flowed beautifully "so I can pocket a piece among my hips" and it made me think of desire, longing to have more of this person, to capture a part of him. Love the confidence you incorporate, especially with January acting like a stronghold of love to you. The way you transition the feeling in this poem to kind of insinuate that there is a growing darkness, emptiness, that maybe everything isn't sure and put to the skies, it well-done. I liked that doubt at the end, yet realizing that if you did have Janus as a lover, maybe times would be different, and the truth would be a lot better to bear with. Great ideas here, thought this piece was a real gem, love how you made it "you".

VOTING:
Word Count: 70 words = 10/10
Creativity: 9/10
Meaning (Content): 8/10
Mythology Ref: Named Janus = 10/10
Pronoun Count: Didn't use listed pronouns more than twice = 10/10

TOTAL = 47/50

Poem #3-

COMMENT:
I feel like a lot of potential content here was just missing. I like the idea of describing the men and women but I didn't feel anymore. You had 20 more words you could have written, maybe after describing this vision of them falling to Hades, being blazed by him, write what you feel, or what your reaction is. Why are you being haunted by this image? That kind of thing- I didn't at all feel the need or reason why you capitalized "scream", or different letters of it at the end...it didn't make it more profound or stand out. So my suggestion is to take that out, what other synonym for "scream" could you use? Describe the silence after that....that punishment you have in the title, say they are his chosen ones to perish, just my opinion. I did like how you took the aspects of Hades and put it into that gloomy palace image I had in my mind- the Styx River, Stygian crypt, you set the scene quite well. I also liked "obfuscated spirits", felt you used that well.

VOTING:
Word Count: 50 words = 10/10
Creativity: 7/10
Meaning (Content): 6/10
Mythology Ref.: Reference to God Hades = 10/10 used Styx River, Stygian to add
Pronoun Count: Didn't use listed pronouns more than once = 10/10

TOTAL = 44/50

Poem #4-

COMMENT:
I felt the rush of this poem, the passion in it, the tide of the ocean. You incorporated Poseidon well, making me think he is this secret love that you are ready to be swept into, no matter if you will be taken under where you cannot breathe. Then your title inputs that maybe she is being saved, that this is simpler than another death she might face, maybe she has been trying to outrun it, but you pen the "doom" well....I loved the image of sirens, it reminded me of a few books I've read where they've ensnared others with their beauty, for instance in Percy Jackson series. This woman accepts and calls out to be rowed toward death. My only suggestion would be the last word "row me to death", it was creative but to be more original make the reader think about more than the end....how does she view "death"? Maybe use a synonym? Maybe something like "row me to your mercy"....just leave the reader pondering a bit more, make that wonder last. Just my opinion, a good read.

VOTING:
Word Count: 67 words = 10/10
Creativity: 9/10
Meaning (Content): 9/10
Mythology Ref.: Poseidon - 10/10
Pronouns Used: Didn't use listed pronouns more than twice = 10/10

TOTAL = 48/50

Poem #5

COMMENT:
What really didn't grab my attention or motivate me to want more in this poem was the lack of originality. You open this poem up with so much imagery, but it doesn't seem like something new, something enrapturing. Use a metaphor or something other than "golden rays cascading" to describe his hair, describe something about his lips, what's in his smile? Of course he's young like you say but is he lively, what's his spirit like? I still think you could have gone within the word limit if you crafted your words more carefully, not just using imagery but in a few words saying how captivated you were by him, not just his image. However, I love how you wrote just plain and simple "I inhale" and then describe the scents, it is freshening what you write. I like the "meant to meet crossroads" that was unique- instead of saying "path" or "destiny". The Zeus part was a bit longer and I wish you would have tried to incorporate him in the beginning, and then at the end, all you would have to say is something like "I ask him, who is this man?" Was not a fan of repeating the title at the end, I'd say you didn't need it, don't say you were "breathless"- let the reader feel it in the beginning. Give that scene of Zeus at the start and the moment when your hands touch, you would have had enough words if you re-worked this. Still it was a interesting and beautiful snapshot to read.

VOTING:
Word Count: 83 words = no points
Creativity: 7/10
Meaning (Content)= 7/10
Mythology Ref.: Named Zeus = 7/10
Pronoun Count: Didn't use listed pronouns more than twice= 10/10

TOTAL = 31/50

Poem #6

COMMENT:
I love how you began this poem, describing the long amounts of time, how it so slowly passed in that silence, and the question of if it was at all supposed to make you learn, grow. Very daring imagery here, I like the power behind it, "the notion of escape lingered on my tongue", like the soul was wanting to do something, put life behind these thirty-seven weeks. I like the transition also, hearing the scream of Ares, the war god, and wanting to enter something, something dangerous even? Good use of words, lunging at freedom, going toward that gift. You did use "I" four times when you should have only used it twice yet I have no suggestions otherwise as I really liked the brevity in which you invoked.

VOTING:
Word Count: Exactly 70 words = 10/10
Creativity: 9/10
Meaning (Content): 9/10
Mythology Ref.: Named God Ares = 10/10
Pronoun Count: Used "I" four times = no points

TOTAL= 38/50

Poem #7

COMMENT:
I don't really see the need to write 8:40:00 instead of just 8:40, the latter worked and was more simple but that's just my opinion. The opening, I felt the flow was broken, and that it wasn't the most original yearning you could have written about. Write something more than just "making my breaths count"- you want to do more than that right? Was not a fan of repeating the "count" part. I did like how you described the matter of seconds, making it personal and something you seem to be born with, surrounding you. The heartbreak at the end is so well felt, I was not at all expecting a September 11 reference, I hope this isn't true, to lose her life as those towers went done. The imagery you don't even write here but provoke with these words is well-thought out. This part definitely made me think "she deserted because of me"- incredible emotion here. Nice job.

VOTING:
Word Count: Exactly 70 words = 10/10
Creativity: 6/10
Meaning (Content): 8/10
Mythology Ref.: Named God Ares = 10/10
Pronoun Count: Didn't use listed pronouns more than twice =10/10

TOTAL= 44/50

Poem #8-

COMMENT:
I love the simplicity here- yet you craft with such ease and the flow in this poem is really calming. I was captured by the title, and you penned Diana and Selene with such grace. What struck me most about the poem was the beauty you made me see and feel, how you didn't just mention Diana and Selene but touched you with their radiance, made you blessed, alive. I have a renewing feeling when reading this, tenderness like you described in the first few lines....lovely use of "mandalas" and "majestic words"- really enjoyed this one, seem other earthly to me, kind of celestial....you painted "divinity" into something more than beautiful but everlasting.

VOTING:
Word Count: Exactly 70 words = 10/10
Creativity: 9/10
Meaning (Content): 10/10
Mythology Ref.: Named Diana and Selene = 10/10
Pronoun Count: Didn't used listed pronouns more than twice= 10/10

TOTAL = 49/50.

----------------------------------

Entry number 1
Title: A Blue Rose Petal's Falling
Wonderful scene with an intriguing mystery. This is an example of forcing the reader to read between the lines to generate a history. The interpretation may be different, I believe, for each person, but my own is of a cowboy returning to the scene of a suicide by his loved one, or perhaps the place where she had been lynched by a mob. The opening lines flaw the read, though, and could use punctuation and spell checking. It would be helpful to put a semi-colon after "Cowboy" and after "shame." Also, I'd correct stil to still & ditch the comma after it.
NOTE: It may not have been deliberate, but Judith Haynes is the author of a book, "Please Dance at My Funeral" aimed at helping people work through the grief of death. The spelling seems too close for random choice.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -0
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -0
Snapshot quality: +15
Poem quality: +30
Total: 45

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Entry number 2
Title: Into the future of January
This work aims its appeal to a specific audience: young women in love who have a fatalistic outlook on relationships. His/her use of imagery to accomplish the work is masterfully handled. However, Janus is most commonly associated with beginnings, or transitions rather than prescience, which could be better incorporated in the poem along those lines.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -0
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -0
Snapshot quality: +13
Poem quality: +28
Total: 41

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Entry number 3
Title: Stygian Crypt- The Punished
Like a scene from D&D the imagery is dark and hideous throughout. While I question the use of "obfuscated" in reference to the spirits, it can be intuitive in nature to describe the confusion of mind associated with the newly deceased. The cuteness of "ScrEaM" seems misplaced also. It's emphasis would be less distracting by either all caps or initial. Overall, the scene is portrayed in accordance with the rules. The comma after spirits should be converted to match the hyphen after them, or vice versa.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -0
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -0
Snapshot quality: +15
Poem quality: +25
Total: 40

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Entry number 4
Title: Her mercy
["me" used thrice]. It seems almost deliberate that the technical violation occurs all in the same stanza, especially in such repetitive format. Regardless, the photograph is vivid, imagery evoked perfectly: the waters at the Siren's feet adding to the draw of her power, the splinters of the oars, the salt water on the tongue. Well done.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -15
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -0
Snapshot quality: +11
Poem quality: +28
Total: 24

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Entry number 5
Title: Intoxicated
[84 words, 14 over the limit]. Some snapshots need a history, but not this one; it is iconic in the depiction of young love/lust at the peak of it's madness. The attraction of the young man to the poet is near frenzy in pitch such that you don't need a soothsayer to know what to expect next. Of course, the use of three extra lines than allowed by the rules helps the development immensely.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -0
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -15
Snapshot quality: +15
Poem quality: +32
Total: 32

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Entry number 6
Title: Untitled
["I" used thrice] Literally this is a snapshot, a vignette without history yet without purpose. It appears to be a slice of a larger work, or perhaps it should be the core of such. Despite it's technical disqualification, it held my interest. Before posting it, the poet should add some explanatory verses as to why the protagonist is in this situation, how Ares is associated with his fate and create a meaningful conclusion. Then this poem would be quite enjoyable.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -15
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -0
Snapshot quality: +15
Poem quality: +25
Total: 25

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Entry number 7
Title: Untitled
[72 words; 2 over the limit] While much is confused here (answering a phone she abandoned because of the speaker; six plus minutes to answer the phone although no phone should continue to ring for that long) there is no issue with the intent of personalizing the horror of 9/11. In a way, though, it's almost too easy to raise the specter of the event for the deliberate purpose of adding emotional impact without earning it through the words. Mimicked Ares, too seems almost a throwaway to meet the technical obligation of the contest.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -0
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -5
Snapshot quality: +11
Poem quality: +24
Total: 30

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Entry number 8
Title: Divinity
Grand scale of vision. The poem is full of moon (triply named) but even with the repetitive references it has a quality of hallowed simplicity. The experience is more metaphysical than physical, so the action depicted my be allegorical in its intent. Well done, although not strictly a snapshot.

Use of forbidden words more than twice: 'I, me, he, she, her, his, it': -0
Incorporation of god, goddess or mythology: -0
More than 70 words: -0
Snapshot quality: +10
Poem quality: +28
Total: 38.

---------------------------------------------

Poem #1

Points total: 38
Words: 10
Repetition: 10
Reference: 5
Content: 5
Originality: 8

One of the rules was that there needs to be a reference to a god or goddess - a reference to mythology. Now, because I did not know if they were talking about a god, or the God, I decided to cut them a little slack because they might have gotten confused. The content also scored low because of the fact that they did not use any punctuation, which made it confusing as to when the thought ended, and another began. The originality scored high, because of the topic of this poem.

I have never read a poem that had a topic such as this one. It made me want to drop my jaw in shock after I finally realized what the poem was about. Now, I don't know if the poet was there at the hanging, or if they visited this place. I am going to go with the idea that the place was visited because I do not sense a whole lot of grief (I am terribly sorry if I am wrong). Very original topic, and very devastating to see at the same time. There were a few errors in it and I am sure that the reader will find them after looking through the poem carefully.

Poem #2

Points total: 42
Words: 10
Repetition: 10
Reference: 10
Content: 7
Originality: 6

Excellent poem. I really like this one. However, I could not really discover the snapshot of this poem. I know that it is about their lover, but what? There is not really any details that give me a specific moment, so that is why the content lost points. Originality was also low due to the fact that love is a wildly known subject - it is used often too much, but I think that it was done nicely here. If this is indeed not a love poem, I apologize. This is a beautiful metaphorical poem. This person did well on the reference because I have never even heard of Janus until now.

Like I said, I really like this one. You wrote it beautifully, I think. I don't really have much to say, but you put in beautiful imagery. I could tell that you wanted to stay with this person for the rest of your life, which made it even more special. Beautiful.

Poem #3

Points total: 39
Words: 10
Repetition: 10
Reference: 8
Content: 6
Originality: 6

Death is a common topic in poems, so that is why the originality and content scored low. I know that Hades is the god of the underworld, and I know that everything you used is in relations to that. For the reference, Hades is well known, and so is the River Styx, but I gave you credited for using them. I also gave you some points for using the Stygian crypt because I believe that this is where the stygian witches live? If not, I am sorry for the misunderstanding, but I am almost positive it is. The reason that I gave you some points for that is because I did not know about them until recently, so I thought that was pretty neat.

Overall, this is a good poem. I like that you chose to write about the darker aspect of mythology, because that is always interesting to me. The imagery is also very well done, except for one part that I did not fully understand...the line 'manacles made of spears' kind of threw me off as I was trying to picture it. Sadly, I did not come up with anything. One of the things that I did not like about this poem was the 'SCrEaM.' I thought that it would be better as 'SCREAM' because that is usually how it is symbolized in words - that is just my opinion though. You also created beautiful imagery - I could just imagine them walking manacled to each other. This is a very good poem. Well done.

Poem #4

Points total: 34
Word count: 10
Reference: 8
Repetition: 0
Content: 8
Originality: 6

One of the rules of this round was that the poet was not supposed to use a certain list of words more than twice. Looking at that list, I believe that one of those words was 'me' which is used three times in the last stanza. The reference score was pretty good, I deducted a couple points because of the fact that Poseidon is a well known god and sirens are also well known creatures - I was hoping for something a little less well known. Something that would have piqued my curiosity...Originality scored low because I really did not find anything new in this, but I gave them some credit because the poet painted beautiful imagery. Content scored pretty well due to the of the imagery and the creatures that were used.

This is a very interesting poem. Sirens are supposed to be very beautiful creatures that lure men to their deaths which, not ironically, is the conclusion of this poem. Even though you expressed the siren a little graphically (in my opinion) I was still able to enjoy this poem immensely because I know the topic. Very well done.

Poem #5

Points total: 33
Word Count: 0
Reference: 7
Repetition: 10
Content: 8
Originality: 8

One of the rules of this round was that you are not supposed to use more than 70 words, which this poet did so they automatically lost points. Even though they did exceed the word limit, they still managed to not repeat any of the words three times. The reference also caused the person to lose points because Zeus is one of the most well known gods of mythology - he is probably the one that I did not want to see because he is so common, however, I still gave the poet points for having a reference. The content and originality also received relatively high scores due to the way that the poet wrote this. They are explaining someone only they know, so of course it is original. However, the looks of people have been in poems before, so it is nothing new to me.

I enjoyed this poem very much. I like how you described the person's face - it seemed very dreamlike to me. Even though I deducted points, I still like the way that you included Zeus into this. Wondering if he could hear the thunderous beats? Very interesting :) Overall, this is an excellent poem.

Poem #6

Points total: 21
Word Count: 0
Reference: 8
Repetition: 0
Content: 6
Originality: 7

Due to the fact that this person had more than 70 words in their poem, they lost a great deal of points. The same goes for the repetition - they used the word 'I' more than twice so again, another good amount of points were loss. The reference was good because I like the way that you incorporated it into your poem and how you did not use one of the three main gods. Content was okay, but nothing made me go WOW! Originality was also okay, but this type of snapshot was something that almost all of us live even if it is not in the same exact situation. I wanted a snapshot that only you would have lived - something that was special about your life, more personal.

I am sorry if I offended you, but from what I understand you are talking about how you wanted to escape from somewhere. Now, I don't have an exact idea where you would be incarcerated for thirty-seven weeks, but I think that I am getting a hint. I wonder what you did that made you incarcerated for that long? That is less than a year...Anyway, it did include a snapshot into your life, but I think that it is too general. I really did not catch any detail other than being locked up that made me feel like I was in this exact moment in time with you. Other than that, it was very well done.

Poem #7

Points total: 34
Word Count: 10
Reference: 8
Repetition: 0
Content: 8
Originality: 8

This poem is quite a piece of art, in my opinion. As I was reading this, I noticed that the words exceeded 70, but some of the characters in the poem are numbers. So, after erasing all of the numbers I discovered that they had less than 70 words :) which made me happy. Unfortunately, they did repeat a word that was on the list three times which of course made me sad. I think this poem has potential. The reference scored pretty low because of the god that they chose - Ares is well known where I am from, so he is nothing new to me. However, I like it that you did not use one of the three siblings - Zeus, Hades, and Poseidon - the others deserve to be recognized. Content was good, because I find this a tribute to 9/11 even though the main subject was a woman. Originality was also very well done because it was telling the reader what could have happened in the last 6 min before the two towers crumbled.

I like this poem. I like how you connected Ares to the aftermath of the 9/11 attacks, and I like how you described what might have happened before. If I read this right, I believe that the person called the girl because they knew that something was going to happen - they wanted to say goodbye? I'm sure that most of those who did die would have wanted to do the same thing...it was so devastating. Excellent message :)

Poem #8

Points total: 48
Word count: 10
Reference: 10
Repetition: 10
Content: 8
Originality: 10

Very good poem. A metaphorical masterpiece, in my opinion. The reference scored high due to the fact that I did not know who either of these goddesses were. I had to look them up :) There were a couple points taken off the content, because this piece was about love. However, not too many were taken off because it was expertly done. For originality, it was beautiful. You described her beauty perfectly if this is in fact about a girl.

This is a very beautiful poem. I enjoyed it immensely. I don't really have anything to say about it only that you did very well. I could find no fault with it whatsoever. Your imagery was fantastic, as was the emotions that you put into it - I could tell that you loved this person and were in awe of her. Very beautiful.

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I apologise that I haven't arranged them but I really have some annoying problems on my PC and it's driving me insane. Don't buy one like mine. Don't.

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Edited: Eliminated poets:

Number 5, 6 and 4.

Thanks all for your patience and the final round will be up in a matter of minutes!

Edited: Sorry, number 4 is eliminated not number 3! My mind is somewhere else.

AWESOME