Winners! Monday October 8, 2012

^ my time zone

Congratulations for those who went to the front page, well done poets, amazing nominations this week!

Tie on 3rd place:
________
WINNERS:
________

Still Life
by Karla 10 + 7=17

Valerie
by Abed 7+4=11

Pleading Insanity 10
by Chelsey

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Resurrection
by The Poetess 10

Contraception 10
By The princess

Winter's Spectrum
by Xanthe 10

The illusionist
by The Poet Behind The Poems 4 +4= 8

Nunca Mas
by The Poetess 7

In the witness box
by Karla 7

82 Days #1
by Lu 7

Seasonal Fruits
by Yakori 4

Lost love
by Amreen 4

__________
COMMENTS:
__________

Valerie
by LP

There are a lot of ways to express the love you have of your homeland, and you've done a perfect job, you've managed to symbolize the sheer determination of resistance and entrusted it into the hands of little Valerie, who was full of life while roaming the streets of Jerusalem, stressing on how the innocence of little kids diminishes as they are forced to grow up before their time in an environment where guidance through times of anguish and despair is scarce.
What I admired the most though, was your ending lines, as you forced me as a reader to look in between the lines, as you mentioned how Valerie might require a key to her home, totally made me
Think of resistance, as we see how people still value their homelands, as a poem, this was beautifully written, and had a nice melody to it, shows how unique and gifted you have become.
Thanks for the journey- 4 points.

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This is so sad and heartbreaking and yet the author manages to write the entire piece so wonderfully throughout. I was reminded me of the song upon seeing the title and it made me want to dive into the piece and see just what it was about. I'm fond of the twirling like a ballerina-this reminds me of little girls in a ballet class and sets the tone of the imagery which is present throughout the entire poem and yet whilst this creates such beautiful and light hearted imagery here the poem quickly transistions into a more melancholic setting (At least, from my interpretation of it.)
The Blue bird crying to be freed-I wonder if this is a reference to mourning?
Mentioning holding her hand by chance and not letting her twirl astray-simply beautiful. Just beautiful. It makes me picture a little girl lost, possibly searching for a loved one, yet beliving that she will be okay, that she will find her way home eventually.
Forever young-Coming back to what I previously mentioned about the bluebird-Valerie died, and she will be forever young? That's what I got from these lines and I find it to be very emotional.
I don't like the closing-it seems somewhat weak when the rest of the piece has been very strong in terms of emotions and making the reader -feel- the author's words.
Overall, a lovely and moving poem-7 points

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Still life
by: Karla

There is a simple message within these lines, confiding in the fact that no matter
How much you think you know about a certain individual, you will only know what they decide to share, there are always things that will remain forever unseen, untold. Therefore understanding someone fully
Can never be fully accurate, the opening lines indicate the presence of an intellectual man on a journey
Of acquiring a great deal of wisdom while racing with the hands of time, and as you try to decipher and understand his methods, you stare in awe as you see how he thrives with hardships and harsh reality of life
You became aware of the fact that understanding him will never be fully possible.

You're a great asset to this website Karla, skilled and you own a great imagination and vision as a poet, I salute you and I believe this is worthy of a win.-7 points

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This piece was FANTASTIC!!! There is such a level of detail and importance here. I love the style and the words you have used. good job with the story or reason of the piece, that was captivating. All in all this was a wonderful piece, I love the words and picture. It left me thinking a little bit, but that was nice. -10 points

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Pleading Insanity
by Chelsey

This poem is one of the most unique and creative love poems I've read in a while. It has a delicious flavor of wording. I adore the in-depth emotion of how the author describes her feelings of being so emotionally drawn to her love that she would do almost anything to be with him. I really admired the
Creative word description... this poem was full of excitement in a sad way... it was really a powerful love poem for me to read.

"I've lost it.
Unbelievably, undeniably, irresponsibly,
lost it."

This stanza in the middle of the poem was a delight, for it expressed the over powering emotion she is feeling. Really an intense read and one that I shall read again! Awesome piece!- 10 points

**************************************HM'S

The illusionist

I really think this piece was penned very well. The emotions are very clear, the word choice is phenomenal. Your style was a nice choice and it adds an extra dimension to the piece. Its a very relatable piece. The descriptions are excellent and are really vivid great piece- 4 points

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I love this. The whole poem screams resentment and bitterness and is filled with such emotion throughout. I found how the author states the person's eyes were forbidden to see very original-so often we all say we were "Blinded" within our work, and I like that the author is conveying that here but in a completely different way than usual.
I enjoy the occasional subtle alliteration throughout this, although I found this poem to have more of a dark tone and intent than a sad one.
My favourite part has to be the closing verse-it reminds me of how we close our eyes and believe what we want to believe of those we love and in any type of relationship not just a romantic one, which brings me back to the author's "forbidden to see" in the opening lines.
"Open your eyes." Lovely. A powerful ending and masked with contempt and sarcasm.
I enjoyed the flow in this poem, I read this silently and out loud and found it to be constant and unfaltering and the imagery created throughout really leaves the reader able to visualise what is being desrcibed.
I enjoyed this because the author placed themselves as thr "villain" of the piece which isn't something often seen. - 4 points

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Contraception

Reading your title and going through the first stanza showed exactly what are you intending to pin down here, yet I have to praise your efforts of trying to be your own critique, bench-marking free will as the ultimate goal of the recent revolution, yet you were brutally harsh and honest and forward while pointing out the malfunctions that exist within the system.
Pointing out the irony did its job, as I was left to wonder endlessly about the misfortunes people had to go through to achieve what they thought was their right to be free, only to witness the same amount of grief and fears they had to deal with in the past, yet still won't budge to reality as they still continue to offer the most revered of sacrifices.
"We needed constancy", I love you how you stressed on this, as it rings a bell to the solution at hand.
Overall, I believe this is one of the finest poems I've managed to read this week, your tone was powerful and it shows how confident you are with your words, having a good background about this subject and possessing such clearness leaves you with the job of informing others and influencing them, and that you've fulfilled brilliantly.- 10 points

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Resurrection
by The Poetess

I was completely blown away by this poem. The first time I read it, I felt as if I was reading an old famous poem that would be in high school literature books that students are supposed to break down and analyze it. Something worth publishing for sure. This poem was all about the way you chose to phrase your words. It captivated my attention wholly. I admit, the first time I read I couldn't even comment on the content, the subject, the sadness, I was so intrigued by the metaphors and how you words were twisted it to such utter beauty. The nature in this piece is honestly something I have never come across in a poem before. Yes, I read love and nature poems, sad and nature poems, etc where metaphors are used around nature, but this was phenomenal. Incredibly creative and unique! Your first stanza leaves such a vivid image in the readers head and I'm in love with the last line! So easy to picture to friends, two loves, a mom and child sniffing pollen and watching it float into the air. Your second stanza was my absolutely favorite part. Incredible comparison to elk and I think adding "nameless woods" is such an amazing way to describe that you're lost.
"when I first made love to your voice, when
you first saw petrels in
my laugh." -----------------What can I say about that besides Just beautiful!!
Everything about this poem engulfs me and I'm left wanting more. More of the story, what happens next, how do you feel, give me more because this poem touched me in ways I can't describe! Seriously admirable talent you have!- 10 points

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Winter's Spectrum
by Xanthe

I absolutely adore this. It's such an original piece and I really like how the author included the time frames at the start of each verse. I find the first verse intriquing because of the "Piercing shadows"-this made me think that someone or something else was there, and yet the next lines mention hoping to find someone else there. It creates a paradox for me.
The personification of winter adds a lovely effect and creates such nice imagery for me, which conflicts with the dark tone of the piece, which I found added to the depth. I don't like the last line of the second verse, as the sudden rhyme alters the flow.
The verse in brackets-is this the author's thoughts as they are lying in bed trying to sleep? That's how I interpreted this part, and also the way this was worded was incredibly moving and emotional as it made me think on the people who have a mental illness and -don't- have control of their own mind. Elegantly described.
3.15 onwards-reminds me of a love lost, and the author is thinking on the past relationship, which again succeeds in keeping them from sleeping. I'm very fond of the crawling worm image.
The last line makes me wonder, who is the author referring to? The person they mentioned previously or are they coming back to not having control over the own mind and they shouldn't have listened to their own thoughts? I find this to be a wonderful closing, as it leaves the reader free to interpretate how they wish.
I very much enjoyed this.- 10 points

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In the witness box
by Karla

Karla, I often times become very envious of your poetry. A simple phrase, a unique quote, a movie, all of the things that inspire you just astound me and make me wish I had a brain that functioned like yours and wrote such brilliant poetry from them. I love that this whole poem had the scene of a court room. I love that you used typical court expressions and revolved them around this poem. Loved the parenthesis, reminds me of someone on a witness stand who has something to say but is to afraid to voice it, it was neat that we were able to read what he was thinking about what he just said.

She was not guilty
of being less than perfect

It was when loneliness spoke
for the first time.
She heard it with her eyes half open,
grieving until her tears turned into
devotion for herself.

^ These lines are what made the poem for me. Just powerful, really describes this persons emotions, her character, her sadness. I could feel both people in this poem. The person telling the story, and the person being described. Amazing write Karla, I truly admired this one.- 7 points.

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Nunca Mas
by The Poetess

The emotion here is well expressed and the style was chosen in a fantastic way. Your words hold so much power. The way your voice shines here is so nice. I love how you tell your story and how this really could be taken in multiple ways. - 7 points

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82 Days #1
by Lu

This poem was very unique and deeply emotional for me to read. As a loved one watches their loved one slowly fade health wise, it is only natural for them to try and feel what their loved one feels... The author of this heart grabbing piece took a unique angle within this piece and it truly made me tear up. It brought me back to when a loved one of mine passed on and I don't think anyone who read this piece had or will have a dry eye after reading. I applaud her for sharing such a personal poem with all of us and I truly feel this piece deserves to be highlighted. The format and creativity is one of the many reasons why I chose this piece this week. Beautiful and touching piece Lu~ -7 points

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Lost Love
by Amreen

Amreen, your creativity in this poem put me in such a happy and serene place. Reading the comparison of love to different styles of poetry really made me love this piece!! Just loved what you did with each form of poetry and you took the rules of that form and threw them in your stanzas.
Your love was like the freshness of a haiku, meetings symbolizing the passion of a love sonnet, This bond dwindled Like a reverse etheree when the syllables of our love, like a freestyle verse
which lacks the rhyme of life, state without you is like a sad ghazel which yearns for your care and love.

^^ You didn't miss a beat with any of these forms. Spot on with with your analogies, which should really overwhelm a poet. I think a lot of writers should fall in love with this poem because we are probably the only ones who can understand it which is also awesome. So so creative and this turned out so beautiful.
-4 points

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Seasonal Fruits
by Yakori

I can't express the feelings that ran through my mind within this beautiful nature poem. I was swept away into a wonderland of words! Writing about the seasonal fruits of nature.... Love the title! It always intrigues me how creative writers can be when describing nature and Yakori really took me on a fun and enchanting nature adventure. Very soothing piece!!

"Carving lines through my withering face,
rustle of leaves wash away my wishes,
to gather moments of gusty peace. "

Leaves have a way of bringing peaceful thoughts about and within the soul, this poem was rich in beauty and word display... love and admire this poem very much~- 4 points

WHOOOO HOOOOOO!!!!!

Congrates winners and hm's!!!

These poems were out of this worlds this week!! :-)))

Awesome job judges:-)

Aaaand of course awesome as always nana :-)

Congratulations to all the winners and Hm's this week! Beautiful Poetry :-)

Thanks so much for everything. I owe much to Poems and Quotes. I owe much more to Phoenix Rising - my first club here. If Sylvia didnt believe in me and hadn't given me an opportunity to be a member, my poetry wouldn't be the same. But the encouragement I got there made me feel I could write poetry in English. I learnt so many things with Sylvia, End of Eternity, Meena, Lostlove 1, Mel, Temps,Nana, TJ, Colm, Randy, Cindy and etc.But above all I learnt that nobody could develop as a writer without feedback and support thats why I do think and I know I am repeating myself that downrating a poem without a comment is such a dishonest act. But I am not here to complain about that again because I am really happy to share the front page with Abed - my good friend, my Lebanese son and Chels who is a talent too.
I salute The Ravens Haven, The Kite Runners and Free Spirits. It's time to celebrate! Thanks again.

Amazing poets and poems this week!
Congrats you guys!!! :]

Well done guys and girls

Great Job Guys these poems were totally amazing

congratulations for winners and HMs

Congratulations to all winners and HMs...:)
Thanks nana for considering my poem:)

Congrats to all the winners and HMs. A well deserved win and rank to everyone. Thanks for considering my piece, Nana, am grateful. Cheers! :) ..

Thank you everyone for the kind comments and the congrats on my poem :)

Congrats to the winners and HM's!

Wooo hoooooo :)

Congrats guyyssss!!!!!! :)) Awesome job all!

What happened to the judges scores next to their comments....can we have this back please???

Done!

Thanks judges and congrats co-winners and hms!

Thanks for adding Nana....I just always like to know that a comment is in fitting with the score....weird I know....hope it didn't cause too much trouble for you to add this info???

No not all :) I'll keep them from now on.

Congrats on winning Karla, Chels, and Abed

and the hms too!

Thank you thank you :)

I feel like a little old lady who adores the small things in life...because I think that little "win" icon is so cute...hehe!

Hehe you're so cute yourself

Sorry for the lateness guys but a huge congratulations to the winners and hm's this week!!! So happy to see such talent!!! You guys are awesome!!!

I miss you Nana x

^ Your dog's eyes always get meeee... ahh

Awww miss you more sweety :) and he's right !