Larry's Poems :)

Please comment with what you think is the best poem of the following 3, anyone can comment, and you do not have to give a reason. Thanks. x x

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1. Freedom of the Isles

Sailing away to Sugar Hill Island,
sitting in my cabin, watching the horizon
rise and fall with the waves;
it looks like a postcard through the windows
and circles of the portholes.

I held back too many unspoken words
from the weeping beauty standing there
on the dock as I left. Words. Useless!
Our time together stolen too soon.
What could I say to her to ease the pain
when I have nothing inside to feel
but a solid block of icy granite?

This trip - it shows the value
of determination to go beyond human
contact and the futility of expectations.
She expected that we'd be together
happily-ever-after nonsense;
I expected that we'd move on eventually
so here I am, doing just that.

I ascend to sit by the tiller,
take it from the stay rope
and feel the boat's urge
to turn with the current.
Steady hand, bow into the curls,
head out and away for good.

Turning around I can just see
the tips of Pic du Paradis -
Paradise Peak, disappearing,
soon lost over the horizon.

What might have been?
Thoughts arise of their own accord
of futures passed up and a lonely, aged
man sailing alone on empty seas.

Suddenly a flying fish skips
onto the deck and flops in front of me.
Wetting my hand I pick it up and marvel
at it's colors reflecting in the sunlight,
hues changing as it wiggles to be free.

I toss it back, but something happens in me
that is difficult to describe: like a rock
melting in gentle warmth.
Look ahead at the endless waves;
then firmly pull the tiller to put about,
return to the only thing in my life
that felt right and good; even enough
to rethink what freedom really means.
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2. Hic Sunt Dracones

Hic Sunt Dracones:
here be the destroyers of life
and the protectors of Life;
here be the stuff of nightmares
and the inspiration for dreams;
here is Proteus, tightly gripped,
shifting from Evil to Good to Evil
and never changing shape.

Hic Sunt Leones:
here is the golden brick coward
who becomes the stalwart hero;
here are the fathers and uncles
who run in terror from the shadow
cast by their own hidden power
yet guard the hearth from wolves;
here be the clay-feet hardened to iron.

Hic Sunt Daemons:
here be the tormentors and bullies
who inspire their victims to greatness;
here be the agents of persecution
that bring about revolution and freedom;
here be the hopelessly hardened hearts
that carry each and every to the abyss,
begetting the strength to persevere.

Hic Sunt Hominum.

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3. I walk the Pacific, Nicaragua

While you dream, alone, in our cabana, I walk the Pacific,
as whenever we escape our crowds, and as I have
on night beaches from Capistrano to Montelimar.

Moonfire rises inside wave-curls, exploding as they crash;
receding waves ploughing sand from my stance,
forcing me onward whether I would or not.

The moon suspends my disbelief in improbable conceit
that you manage to still love your pathetic somnambulist,
despite my noisome habits that stirred you from your sleep.

Small creatures collide against my ankles, clawing away
in their furious escape to the shelter of depths, where
the blue of the night deepens to indigo below.

For you I contend with Waves bringing high tide to the edges
of the world, and even more, your blessing is my salvation,
or long ago I would have succumbed to melancholic urges.

At the beach hotel para la raza Nicas, riotous partiers
out-sing the breakers, joined by fishermen's sons,
while papas boat surf, casting for daily fish & bread.

I glide through these waves 'neath, the standing moon,
restless, free, both missing your company,
and dreading the moment when I rejoin you.

I choose #1. For the reason that I enjoyed reading it best. I think the other 2 have more complex wording, and perhaps more creativity in them, but I feel the first poem offers more emotional connection for me and flows smoother to me. So I would go for this one.

All these are wonderful. I would say number 3 though because the wording is fantastic and it seems to flow smoothly

I love number 3 :) it's so creative and the wording is great

These are very nice. But you know, I realized it is utterly useless to compare poetry.
tanks BR you made me realize something that I knew all along!!

^^^^ Hurray!!!!!

I think today is a good day.

Mr. Larry I like number 3 the most, but that's personal taste.

Of course is personal. Now this, is an impersonal respond (because sometimes I could flaunt my head to the level of "NOT TO BE"): 1, 2 and 3
Even though the flowers are the most personal in HOW beautiful they are but their beauty is nothing personal.
This is what I tried to tell as Neema, and only one member could reflect in her poetry, but she fell in love so much with her own beauty that she spent all the energy that she had to explore and venture in the realm of the beauty, to make others to fall in love, with her beauty.
This is your chance now. you too have it in you. (in utterly different way) but please do not fall in love with yourself or your poetry, just fall in love with the, beauty. Then the poetry comes with itself, on its own.

Thanks to all, but how would you suggest changes?

EDIT: What do you think would improve any of these poems?

"do not fall in love with yourself or your poetry"

^ hmmm... falling in love, that space is reserve for someone else not for me nor my poetry.

EDIT: thank you! for the advice though.

Mr. Larry, I read your poems about 3 times ( not enough) but I can't seem to offer any suggestions. Though I was wondering why did you capitalize "Waves" in your third poem.

"For you I contend with Waves bringing high tide to the edges "

Sorry Larry to interrupt, these are very good works.

I see waves as the personification of a universal force against which man must contest for his place in the sun.
There are waves of the sea, waves of obstacles, waves of social interaction, waves as with the energy wearing us to nubs, waves as the standing electron wave that belies solidity (when in reality the electron "shell" is empty space).

I like number 3, because from trough to crest there is so much diversity. The length of this poem was great and put a period on it's ending. As "Shells"
we try for the duration, but still oscillate. Then,
"we are washed up."

To improve any Poem Larry is disection.

TIME!

We all get in a hurry.

I prefer #3 too, I feel it has a much more personal touch

Very hard decision. I feel like #1 and #3 are more personal.. I usually connect more with pieces like those. #2 seems a little to educated for me to fully understand, so I'm gonna have to ponder on that one some more and possibly Google some, lol.

Ultimately, I choose #1 as the best.

So much creativity here, admire these pieces Larry! I would say #1 as well after reading all three. I felt the imagery, atmosphere and your voices speak of moving on from this love. It flowed the most smoothly just in my opinion. #2 was well-worded but didn't fully comprehend as well.. and I really liked your voice in #3, it was a clever tone yet there were a lot of words I would have to look up like Hannah said!

#1 is the best!