Hello everyone, Colm here. We actually ended up with 6 judges this week, after some confusion about a sub judge. The more the merrier though, right? Once again thanks again to the judges and congrats to the winners! Here are the scores
Winners:
The Real Meaning of January Frost by JaneDoeWrites - 10 + 10 + 7 = 27pts
Untitled by Senyru - 10 + 10 + 7 = 27pts
After You by Yaki - 10 + 4 = 14pts
Hm's:
Love Letters by Inside the Liar - 10 + 4 = 14pts
Dancing to Winter by Tara Kay - 7 + 4 = 11pts
7:01 by Sincuna - 7pts
The Broken Streetlight and their Balloon by Far Out Dame - 7pts
Weeping Widow by Baby Rainbow - 7pts
La Douleur Exquise by Hannah Lizette - 4pts
Now (Pleiades) - 4pts
True Friends by Amreen - 4pts
Comments
The Real Meaning of January Frost by JaneDoeWrites
(10) will post when judge gets a chance to write and send in comment
'This poem is beautiful. What I like the most is that while this piece delivers the poet's usual jaw dropping imagery, ("your thoughts were slicing the atmosphere in two fiery halves, and set imagination to fire so we could dance in the ash.")she's also incorporated a subtle rhyme throughout and mixed her intricate descriptions with what I would call refrains.
"Yeah, I believe you heard me loud and clear, I miss you here... I need you here." I love how this brings the reader back to you, back to the person behind all of the complicated imagery. It lets the poem breathe, and traps the reader in the gentle ebb and flow that this poem has to offer. This is truly an epic poem. It reminds me so much of a song, it's so lyrical. Well done!' (10)
'I do agree with other poets who have commented on this poem that you do have a unique style mixed with metaphors and a slight hint of rhyme. You do have a certain way of writing and I admire that you let yourself shine through this piece. The first simile I "oohed" at was the "Your words breeched the oceanic pupils of my eyes like two water giants that were caught mid-flight." That is powerful, lively and full of imagination! There is a pull that none of us can see but only you two can experience. Personally, I've never been in a long distance relationship, but I'm sure many can relate to the next few stanzas. How that person's scent lingers in so many tangible things. The idea of it remaining winter all year reminded me of "The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe" lol. But you made such a lucid point that this person's presence brings light and spring, etc. It is cold and dark without them. Great pondering of it is was fate or what that brought you there and I do like the repetition of "I miss you here... I need you here." It is simple but effective in saying that message loud and clear.
Also, in regards to your author's note about who you were inspired by, I did look up his name. I've never heard of him before but saw he's the author a book and has background in poetry and philosophy. Will have to look up some quotes by him!' (7)
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Untitled by Senyru
'The beginning is so enchanting and inviting... I was pleasantly surprised to see you reference Ludovico Einaudi, as I listen to his compositions quite often, especially when I'm writing! There is such peace in these lines, like that atmosphere is something that takes you away from the busyness of daily life.
Then, I do wonder if this is loneliness, for now you are left alone with your thoughts. Your descriptions are poetic, moving, and I feel the depth of nostalgia, and how this memory of this person is rooted within you. Beautiful specifics, especially with the Rhine River and how you are aware of this person's scent.
The next few stanzas remind me that life moves on and other people enter your life, yet those love never bloomed. I like your reflection on this, from those nights where you think of this person to the mornings where it is a bitter reminder of a new day you must keep yourself busy with. The last line of the last stanza should be "You kindled the fire"?.
I was not expecting "Kudos" as the single last word as I've only heard it in friendly, light manners, yet I feel this great deal of sincerity. That you didn't know that notion of love could grow within you until this person. And that is truly something remarkable.
An endearing write!' (10)
'I absolutely love this poem. There is so much to enjoy about it. The imagery, the emotions that are etched into every single word is amazing and addicting. Your poems are a wonder to read and I will admit that I have missed them. Great comeback. Very good poem.
I like the subtle message that is in each line here. It all has a bigger picture as a whole but it is not simply stated, the main topic. This gives the reader a little flexibility in how they interpret the poem. I love that. A lot.
This is... amazing. The flow is great. Love the message. Good write.' (10)
'I love how the author has divided this into separate parts, sort of like a theatrical play, it adds so much drama and mystery to the piece and gives the reader time to pause and indulge in each scene. I thought this to be a very elegant verse with clever word usage. The whole poem is well crafted and has a very melancholy feel to it. This is certainly a verse I will revisit as I feel I have only scratched the surface of the true meaning behind this poem. Hope you find a title soon :)' (7)
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After You by Yaki
'There is something so raw and real about this write. Like the author has been hurt so much that she just doesn't care who sees her true feelings, she has dropped her emotional guard completely as if to say "Take a look, I honestly don't care". In my opinion it takes a very brave person to open up so completely and that's what makes this verse stand apart from the rest this week. Very well written Yaki.' (10)
'There were a lot of poems this week with complex thoughts and images, but this piece stood out to me for it's bare honesty and simplicity. Yaki's evoked strong emotion and realism in just a few lines and the whole piece is so effortless and accessible, I think anyone could feel what I felt upon reading it. My two favorite lines were: "In every set of brown eyes that I found under every rock, behind every shadow"... what a beautiful line. I think the idea could have been expanded a bit more, but it may have overwhelmed the poem, so I like it still, and "nothing as intimate as having you on the corner of my bed watching me from the corner of your eyes." Clever word play and clever imagery. Your words mean a lot Yaki. This is a really well written piece.' (4)
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Love Letters by Inside the Liar
'This poem starts off the new year as my personal favorite! This is such a heartwarming poem that I do believe all men and women can relate to and be touched by in so many ways.
The author writes of the letters, where they are and how they comfort her. I love the simplistic tone of this piece and the touch of repetition is brilliant and works wonderfully in this poem.
There is a message of sadness; loss of a love, but a deeper message of taking the good memories and keeping them as a positive.
This poem captivated me, truly is a beautiful poem! (10)'
'I'm not familiar with your work so this was neat to come across this piece. I have read many poems in the past that did mention love letters, yet never in the full, emotional way you did here. It is honest and holding nothing back. I also noticed there is not much detail or imagery which makes me think that you lay down the raw truth here. You tell what happened, the lives of these letters and how they acted: "they soothed, they caressed". You did very well in personifying them and I felt their desire to comfort yet your hesitance since they don't hold a firm promise. They profess love yet you can't tell if, in reality, this love may grow. I love how you express this questioning of whether or not to keep these letters. And then how you explain to the reader that you cannot because you feel it would give away that innocence. I like how you worded that. Although it was a bit somber, it reminded me of what makes a monumental moment in our lives... how this younger you was affected by this man. Keep writing!' (4)
Dancing to Winter by Tara Kay
'Tara Kay has a magical way of making me want to dance in snow!
She does that by her creative way of wording. Her descriptive detail of colored, rosy cheeks and smiles, makes me want to toss on my snow boots and run wild in a blizzard!
It's very difficult to impact a reader in a small poem, but can be done with delightful word and description along with heart and soul; which is what this author does and more..
Truly a delightful and touching piece!' (7)
(4) Will be added later
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7:01 by Sincuna
(7) will be added later
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The Broken Streetlight and Their Balloon - by Far Out Dame
'This poet is unburdened by complicated language, it's a breath of fresh air. It's almost written like a story, the details ("down the sides of our cardboard box home and into the empty turtle shells of our pets we couldn't afford to feed,") serving to express who the characters are, their morals, their expectations. They find joy in the simplest things, even the things that don't exist, such as their imaginary jobs, their imaginary marker, etc. Reading this piece just makes me happy. Clever ideas, such as having a book as a roof so you can "read each other to sleep every night" are probably a hint at what this poet can do.
The last stanza is by far my favorite, it shows how free these characters are, how happy they are with having nothing but each other and their imagination. My only suggestion on this poem is to fix the few run-on lines with some line breaks, but otherwise, great job!' (7)
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Weeping Widow by Baby Rainbow
'I absolutely fell in love with this. It caught my attention and really hit a few heartstrings, that is for sure. I love everything about it. The flow is nice and I also like how you broke the poem down. It is a nice touch.
In the first part, I love how gentle the emotions are. It shows the fragile, sweet nature of both the people and the love and how tender it seemed to be. It is a great way to start out a poem like this because it introduces what has been lost then introduces the tragic part.
The second section... oh gosh. I love it. I like the addition of the xylophone and the stars in the sky. It is an interesting comparison. Both are relaxing and I think that sort of reflects the ideas that you had about the love that is shared? That is what I got from the poem.
Love this third part. Comparing the loss to the cold of the winter is perfect. Both leave this... aching feeling in your chest, wrapping yourself up in your arms to keep cold but that can also be a reassuring thing to do in times of sadness.
Ugh, the last part. You see the hope of the person clinging to the love of the one that they have lost and it really wraps up the story and the feelings. It is devastating. Tragic as well and you did a great job at showing that.' (7)
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La Doleur Exquisite by Hannah Lizette
'Something caught my attention rather fast with this poem and I did not read the meaning of the title until the end. Thank you for that though haha.
I love it. I love the imagery. It is beautiful. The dog-earred pages, fingerprints smudges. All of it. It works so wonderfully and I like the image that it paints in my head. It gives you this idea of an old book that you love and hate at the same time and that is always an interesting mix.
I like how you said something about the chapter about denial and how you called it home. It is an interesting look inside of the writer and who they are, as are the things that you do and see within the meaning of the book.
I also like how you compare the book to a person or are you talking to a character within the book, not sure. But I do like it. Makes a personal, deep connection between the two and that is a strong point. Nicely done.' (4)
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Snow (Pleiades) by Meena Krish
'I admire the Pleiades form! It's small but detailed and Meena is the Lady to make this form shine in all it's glory!
She has brought to life, the beauty of SNOW!
The feelings of nature are positive and breathtaking and sometimes simplicity and down to earth writing is what is needed to bring the feelings of that beauty to life.
Very pretty poem here!' (4)
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True Friends by Amreen
'I thought this was a very clever piece. To combine different poetry forms and words/phrases relating to poetry was something I don't recall seeing before. It was refreshing to read something I thought was quite an original idea. I particularly liked how the author described the haiku as being lonely. I always feel these little forms are overlooked and underrated for the most part so I really liked the comparison to real life that was made. Overall, I really did enjoy the whole concept of this verse. Nicely done.' 4
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