So...

Has anyone seen a kangaroo?
a kangaroo or a baboon?
a baboon in the afternoon?
the afternoon spent at the zoo.
the zoo with the great view.
great view with the balloons
the balloons from Mr. kung fu
kung fu - the panda with the tattoo
the tattoo graffitied in the walls at the zoo
the zoo that has its crew
its crew running after the kangaroo
the kangaroo that chased the baboon
the baboon that is coming after you!

watch out, where you are going to!

now it's my turn...
my turn to turn this story to you

It is sweet dear. over whelmed with music.
It is a good representation of our energy.
(A.P. position )

Nothing to add to the story. Wanted to say good work with the rhymes and it reads smoothly, doesn't sound forced at all. Your mentor should be proud of you, I am for trying new things and getting outside your comfort zone.

Thank you Real Meaning and Sylvia,
though perhaps someone from India,
or perhaps from Syria...
could write a story about Australia?

I reread the poem again and you really did a good job in my opinion. Made me want to sing it and smile while I did. lol

A nice example of end word phrase rhyme repeats. I thought this was a unique form and wrote 2 on Valentine's day a few years ago, only to realize months later that Hellon has her name stamped all over it as its inventor! The form is called a "Loop Poem". Nice work Luce.

Ha! Yes!! I was hoping someone would mention that " A lonely Soul." Thank you!

I mean that Hellon created the form "loop poem." though I was also hoping that some more people would join in and create their own poem or some kind of story so others can join in, but I ran out of ideas to continue...

Actually it is not a "loop poem". Here are the requirements as approved and posted on Shadow Poetry back in 2009. To be a loop poem, the last word of line one must be the first word of line two. Last word of line two is first of line three. It continues this scheme throughout.

Form Requirements:
Loop Poetry

Loop Poetry is a poetry form created by Hellon. There are no restrictions on the number of stanzas nor on the syllable count for each line. In each stanza, the last word of the first line becomes the first word of line two, last word of line 2 becomes the first word of line 3, last word of line 3 becomes the first word of line 4. This is followed for each stanza. The rhyme scheme is abcb.

Variations:

1. Stanzas, writers choice on the number, no rhyming, the last word, first word scheme is maintained.

2. One long stanza, no limit on number of lines, no rhyming scheme, the last word, first word scheme is maintained.

3. Couplets mixed with 4 line stanzas, the last word, first word scheme is maintained in the stanzas. It can also be used in the couplets. Rhyme scheme is ab, cc, defg, hh, ii, jklm, nn, oo.

Good observation, Sylvia. So can I claim this form now? I did the same thing as Everlasting did.
I used the last word or phrase. Meena thought it was Loop when I asked her.

What do you say Hellon? :)

Lol... can I claim this form then too? I mean I used exactly the last two words of the first sentence in the second sentence and then the last two words of the second sentence in the third sentence... and so on.
It has the same rhyme through out the poem. I mean they are near rhymes. Though, I would consider this a variation of loop poetry, unless I call it "Looping poetry with Hellon."

I am a hardcore, follow the form requirements person. lol Sorry. The rhymes are not the important part of Hellon's form, it is using the last word of the prior sentence as the first word of the next sentence. The number of lines and rhymes are just things that you can play with.

EDIT: If you read the three items, these words appear in all three - the last word, first word scheme is maintained.

On the submission of the form, there are 4 examples. Only one of Hellon's and the one of mine are still on P&Q. Hellon had two others Bloody Eyes and Picture Frame and are missing from P&Q. In Picture Frame, Hellon used the loop form in just a few of the verses in this poem. I think I remember talking to her about that when she did it and if I remember correctly she was a little apprehensive about the mixture.

How I See You (Hellon)
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/special/poems.php?id=1216149

Will I Cry (Sylvia F.)
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/sad/poems.php?id=1109874

Nicely done, both poems. I think, Hellon and Sylvia are sticklers to form, so I won't question them. :)

But, Luce I liked your comment a year ago on Hellon's loop poem above, so I will post it here:

Everlasting ( F C D ) at 2013-03-08

Hellon, so it was you
You who invented this form
Form that I attempted once,
Once only, but I faced a storm.

A storm of ramble words
Words with no sense at all
All because of a windy flow
Flow so fast so slow, it made it fall.

It fall to a rocky ground
Ground as white as a black sky
Sky that was filled with dark ink
Ink that was so dry

So dry the letters became brittle
Brittle so brittle unreadable
Unreadable to any reader
Reader who saw the unseeable

The unseeable became my poem
Poem that was hit by a storm
Storm that made my canvas dark
Dark as the ink, I have to inform.

--- thanks for inventing this fun form."

^Haha...like your thoughts here, so went ahead and put a praise on the comment just now. You know why it din't get a praise earlier, because you did the same mistake which I did and did not stick to the "form"!
However, you did a good job in the zoo poem above, in my opinion, by creating your own variation, a 2 words (a phrase) to make a nice variation, so now you can have your "crown" to fame. I suggest you call it a "phrase loop" to distinguish it from Hellon's "Loop" which only uses the last word to do an "identical rhyme" to the start of the next line.

I used an article (adjective) in one stanza and another adjective (perhaps an indefinite pronoun) in another, so have an imperfect form to my first "Loop". But, what the heck, I don't think Hellon would crucify me for it. Nor would Shakespeare stir in his grave with this slight variation. I think what matters is only the content and the beauty of the lines to express poetry, does it not?
http://www.friendship-poems.com/poems.php?id=1159957
And this one may have too many "A's" (article/adjective), to qualify it for a true Hellon "loop", but what does it matter, if it sounds better this way.
http://www.best-love-poems.com/poems.php?id=1161146

As usual this seem to be turning in a wrong direction which I shall leave shortly. This is the last comment I shall make on topic and if you feel that it needs to continue, please PM me.

Lucero did a very good job with the poem she wrote, there is absolutely nothing wrong with the poem. It simply is not a loop poem because at this point it does not meet the requirement of the form as written.

from your last comment: ^^^^
r, because you did the same mistake which I did and did not stick to the "form"!

If there are requirements for a poetry form, to me that means they are to be followed. It seems in most of the "invented" forms on Shadow Poetry, the inventors include the variations they might have to their form. All those variations are part of the requirements. So yes, the inventor has requirements follow them. If you want to add variations to a form then perhaps you should contact the original inventor, give them your ideas and see if they can approve them and get them added to their work or refuse the ideas.

"If there are requirements for a poetry form, to me that means they are to be followed."

^that's a pretty good point you made Sylvia. That would explain why there are so many variations of Sonnets and different authors claiming rights.

Though this thread is turning into a different direction. I think it's interesting.

Now that ALS brought that comment I posted in Hellon's poem ( which it made me smile because I had forgotten that I wrote it) It makes me wonder if that was actually a compliment to the author or if it can be seen as an offense?

I mean if someone comes and comment in your poem with another poem inspired by your poem, how would anyone feel?

Agree with above^. Form is a form, no exceptions! But, can one not have some humor at that. Perhaps, people fail to notice a smiley or haha or other ways to express a little humor.
Reminds me of a Brigham Young quote, which I dare not mention here for being perceived as more offense, when none was ever intended here. I did write some of my own similar quotes, in a clean frame of mind....and only a reader can decipher which is offensive and which is not to him/her.
Anyway, my apologies to anyone who was offended by my thoughts or if I stirred "Shakespeare in his grave" with a form variation.
I hope Hellon would not be easily offended with my comments. Would you be Hellon? my favorite free thinker? :)