Weekly Contest Results: 7 April 2014

This week we had six (6) judges voting and commenting! Three judges each recognized genius in Hellon's denunciation of tyranny and oppression of its people and Enslavement of Beauty's recognition that rage brings consequences both global and near, while MaryAnne's Venus-Mars/Land-Sea comparison rounds out the winning slate. Congratulations to all winners and Honorable Mentions.

Cloud Street by Hellon 10 + 10 + 7 = 27 points
A flood by Enslavement of Beauty 10 + 7 + 4 = 21 points
Lighthouse by Poet on the Piano 7 + 4 = 11 points

A story in red by HiddenScars 10 points
Two syllables of Cancer by Maple tree 10 points
Reciprocal Mirrors by RealMeaning 10 points

Nineveh by Andrew Packard 4 + 4 = 8 points

Unhappy affliction by Chris Swiderski 7 points
I'll too be alive by Everlasting 7 points
Inside Her by Karla 7 points

Imagination by Crimson monster shackled and Chained 4 points
All that is left... by Meena Krish 4 points

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Cloud Street by Hellon 10 points
Hellon has a good personal twist with her poetry. She never lacks originality or creativity. This poem has a good use of vocabulary but does not over power the reader with an abundance of unnecessary words. This is a creative twist on poverty and corrupt government. It is difficult to find poems with a flawless rhyming scheme such as this. It is descriptive and holds the reader captive. The first time I read this, it had already made an imprint. Hellon is an old pro.

Cloud Street by Hellon 10 points
Hellon has truly amazed me with this brilliantly, colorful poetic gem here. I can't say enough about this poem without rambling on and on so I will try and get to the main points of this top poem of the week in my opinion.
The title for starters is quite perfect for the message, very unique and holds a power within itself. Titles are important to top of a poem and she has done that and more.
A cloudy street reminds me of chaos and mayhem, sorrow and pain.
The poem was written in an elegant rhyme form and it flowed beautifully. One of the true gifts of Hellon's writing is the gift to tell a message with such creativity and metaphoric delight that you can't help but go on several angles of the message.
What I gained from this heartbreaking poem was that of war and turbulence, ending in death.
To end this beautiful rhyme poem with an Epitaph form was one of the many reasons I chose this poem for my ten choice. It made this poem stand out in more ways than one, and each time I read this poem I cried.
Powerful poem by Hellon this week!

Cloud Street by Hellon 7 points
People living in the clouds, that's what this poem invoked in me. They believe too many promises unfortunately, things turn out too foggy. These people have no life and even though they live together, they have no bond. They don't seem to know each other. They are void of life. This poem made me think of prisoners as if men are prisoners being control by the government. The imagery of this poem is interesting to say the least. Nice touch of brevity as well as rhymes. Though for me what stood out in this poem was the second stanza and the Epitaph. If people don't speak up, they have no voice thus they don't count. So it's easier for others to treat them like puppets. This poem brought that to mind. It's well done. A sad reality. ( 7 points )

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A flood by Enslavement of Beauty 10 points
This poem was a joy to read. I enjoyed the story told as well as the rhyme scheme in each stanza. Anger seems to never leave men's side. There's something haunting about this poem. I would say a mystery. if I may, I can interpret the winds as some metaphor. Perhaps, society? or love? or it could be something else. I can't put my finger on what it is. However, the imagery in this poem is stunning. The voice draws me in. I have read this piece several times and each time, I am drawn more and more towards the image of someone angered finding peace in sleep - then waking up to a flood: to anger again. Anger surrounds this person, so much to the point that I see this someone with red and furious eyes. I even see this someone in tears ( the type that come out when one is infuriated ) as their "lover tak[es] tiny ( backward) steps away." ha! I wonder if the lover had anything to do with the anger the narrator speaks of? or if the lover is scared and doesn't want to be noticed by this someone. Regardless, this piece is thought provoking and enchanting. Well done.

A flood by Enslavement of Beauty 7 points
I have read this authors poetry often from time to time and each time I am left with my mouth wide open.
He has creatively written a poem about the devastation of nature in a metaphoric tone and then tossed me with angles of hidden messages perhaps to a lost loved one, which is why I chose this poem to be highlighted.
I do need to state, that my reasons for ranking this poem a seven was because of "backward" being in parentheses, I felt it broke the ending a tiny bit.
However- I then took a step back and came to the conclusion that he might be trying to add a visualization of impact to the poem and its ending... either way I was really and truly fond of this poem. Beautifully crafted!!

A flood by enslavement of beauty 4 points
This poem is nice, hence I can only give it 4 points. I felt if it had a few more stanzas it would be worthy of more. However that said, what has been written is real quality. A good rhyming scheme always helps the flow of a poem and the rhyming here is very natural. There is strong imagery used and the poem feels very dark. I like the old style word use as well here and there. Gives this poem real character. I love the last line which leaves us pondering what is really going on?
Nice, tight little poem that reads better when you read it aloud.

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Lighthouse by Poet on the Piano 7 points
This very original poem, but it lacks vocabulary. It compares the two extremes and personifies it in such a way that it displays a mental picture. It is short but it fulfils its purpose and doesn't leave the reader begging for more. It is creative and displays character

Lighthouse by Poet on the Piano 4 points
MaryAnne designed such a pretty small poem here, and I had to highlight it this week. What a dazzler.
Small poems need to be packed with a punch and she has done that and more here with this poem.
I was left with such a feeling in my heart as I read this poem.
It is very difficult to take that step forward in life, to "leave the sandy shore and sail away" and she captivated me with this metaphoric message of beauty.
Very pretty poem this week by MaryAnne!!

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A story in red by HiddenScars 10 points
This poem really took my breath away because of all of the beauty and elegance mixed in with the poem.

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Two syllables of Cancer by Maple tree 10 points
What is a poem? A question that has been asked by so many on this site and throughout literary circles. What separates it from prose?
Read this piece and the answer is clear.
Poetry has more of a soul, it has emotion crammed into a few lines. It tugs on your heart strings.
From the clever title that aims to show cancer as nothing more than a word. To the turmoil of emotion that is served in this piece, this is what poetry is. The last line is immense and leaves an important message ringing in all our ears. How as a race we would love to eradicate cancer. It affects too many lives globally. The last stanza is heart breaking and showcases the personal feel of this piece. It is raw but very heartfelt and cleverly written. An easy 10 for me.

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Reciprocal Mirrors by: RealMeaning 10 points
I've known about the creation story and Adam and Eve since I was taught as a child, and although I've read some poems with references to it, I haven't read a dark piece. It is depressing that everything changed with that touch, that first taste of sin. How everything could be a perfection we can't even imagine, and then can become so twisted and full of temptation. Yet that is humanity. We are human perhaps because we cannot live without our temptations, our faults, and even vanity. It is a constant struggle to overcome those vices. The symbol of the snake in this poem is provoking... that image of it consuming us much like a snake would swallow a mouse. How little we are when we give in. This poem also makes me think of knowing how hard a certain choice will be, yet following through so it doesn't become a waste or something meaningless. I love your images and that realization that what possibly drives us are simply illusions. We don't fight back even though we can. Such a powerful line here: "realizing after all these years that the subject of your love has never been there, that everything has been nothing but a programme". Fantastic piece.

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Nineveh by Andrew Packard 4 points
This a powerful poem based on religion. It conveys a strong message. This poem lacks vocabulary and has grammar mistakes concerning the uses of the ellipsis throughout the poem. It is original and conveys a message in a more appealing way.

Nineveh by: Andrew Packard 4 points
This is an intriguing piece with a biblical background. I know I've read about the Ninevites before, I just needed to refresh my memory and I did look it up. God had sent Jonah to preach to the people as Nineveh was named a wicked city of destruction. I like the repeat of "Nineveh, Nineveh what have you done?" It's almost like a disappointment, that this huge city could not glorify goodness and be truthful. That it had to be overtaken by sin. I also like how you speak to the city in general, as if it could have chosen to guide its people. My only suggestion is to polish this piece up a bit more. I noticed most stanzas did not have punctuation which was fine as each line made sense standing independently on its own, but I feel like you used to many "..." and sometimes you didn't capitalize beginning ideas/thoughts at the start of a line. You do have a great voice in this poem though, telling of the consequences, of the horrific images, of a mournful tale like in these lines: "Woe to the vast city of plunder, enslaved like the lust of a harlot". Your style is memorable; I enjoyed this piece.

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Ill too be alive by everlasting 7 points
This poem was different and took me for a spin.

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Inside Her by Karla 7 points
I am inspired by this piece of brevity, especially how you proudly told this woman's story in only six lines. I feel her whole spirit is poetry, and that she touches others with it. Very unique to say that there is an altar in her chest and that language is sacred to her. It actually reminds me of a theorist we studied in class who was a logophile, a lover of words, and studied many ancient languages. "as she tries to escape the flux" made me think about how everyday language evolves, how new words are added to the dictionary each year, and how one word can take on multiple meanings. Yet she stays true to its etymology, and has almost a reverence for its early usage. With the ending lines, I imagine a woman who cannot be defined as a single word. Her spirit can't be understood simply by asking what her favorite this or that is. The only suggestion I have is to have a comma instead of a period after "trivia" or use another type of punctuation; the period felt too abrupt. Otherwise, well-written.

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Unhappy affliction by Chris Swiderski 7 points
I love to read a poem that has had all unnecessary words binned. Just look at the last stanza in this piece to see what I mean. Only 14 words but it says as much as a page full, there is pausing, a strong sense of tone and then a real sense of remorse. Interesting that disease is hyphenated yet make-up isn't? But I leave that to artistic licence. I applaud the alliteration at the beginning and the use of some intelligent words throughout. This is cleverly written and very sad as well. The best part for me is the second from last stanza. That line really hits home. Great write a worthy 7 points.

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Imagination by Crimson monster shackled and Chained 4 points
This poem had a lot of imagery and the reader could easily connect themselves with the poem. It was easy for the person to really let themselves enjoy the poem and realize how much meaning was really put into it.

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All that is left... by Meena Krish 4 points
I love the flow in this poem. The words read smoothly and almost song-like. I could picture someone in a dark room while in a curl like position, moving to and fro and repeating these lines. It's almost like a chant.
When grief takes over, it's hard to overcome it, but it is possible to do so. One must grieve and then grief will slowly leave us.
I also like the title. It's fitting. Well done. 4 points.

Congratulations to all the winners and hm's this week. Beautiful poetry <3. Thank you Larry and judges for all you do as well

Wow, some great poetry highlighted and it's an honor to share the page with Hellon and Enslavement of Beauty. Thanks Larry and judges for the critique/comments. Congrats to all the HM's!

Thank you judge for the lovely comment. Congrats evryone. Congrats Enslavement of Beauty!Congrats Poetic Minds!

Congratulations to the winners and Hm's ... Very pretty poems this week!!!

Thank you Judge for the lovely comment on my poem :-)

Thank you judges for your awesome comments...I'm gobsmacked!!! Very much appreciate each one of them. Also thanks to Larry for posting. Congratulations to the other two winners this week and also the HMs.

Congrats Winners & HMs :)

Good job Judges and thanks Mods ^^

Thanks dear for the comment. And no tanks to the other judges for choosing Hellon over me . haha actually her poem was not bad( not as good as mine, but tolerable) and this is the best I can say but her:)(: