Weekly Contest Results 8-4-14

I'm sorry to get the results up so late. It's been a rough week. Looks like something odd happened where Colm's poem should've won, but it didn't? Larry was kind enough to get rid of two public votes, but a 5th judge did not have comments/votes in early enough for him to know where to dump the last 4 points. I blame myself fully for not catching the error and fixing it before the site posted winners. If you'll forgive me, please join me in congratulating everyone who had a poem praised by the judges this week (winners and honorable mentions). Abby's poem blew me away - I haven't had a chance to read the others yet unfortunately. Well done, all. Thanks, judges.
Other mods: Feel free to clean up this thread/organize it better. I'm not feeling well.
-Jane
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Bapi in the Kitchen
by Abracadabra
10+10+4+4 = 28

"One of the many reasons why Abby's poetry stands out on this site is her ability to give the reader a 100% visual's, a picture in words.

What an amazing poem this is.

In every detailed line, I see her father in full description, cooking and humming along to a song that only he knows, cooking the way he cooks and just being his wonderful self. The author expresses her love for her father from start to finish in the descriptive masterpiece.. Just outstanding!!

The fun and flavorful words she uses is another bonus to this poem, such as "pulpy and crinkled"- You can hear him cutting on the chopping board and smell the food cooking... simply Beautiful!" (10)

"This piece was completely refreshing to read! The aromas created, the care in your father's actions, everything you have painted comes alive in each line. I like the allure of it and the excitement you have in watching him, like a little child caught in a moment of wonder and awe. I know you wrote this in one sentence for a reason as you replied in the comments, and I think it fits so well as I read it in a almost rushed way, fully intriguged as this atmosphere was being imagined. What I admire about this piece is that you show the reader your father, these are all his actions (cooking, singing) and you show the food he makes and everything involved, and I am inspired by this man. Not because you said "he" all the time or described exactly how he felt, but this whole piece holds such a charasmatic attitude. I can feel his happiness seep through this piece. Wonderful gem, this poem is oozing with personality!" (4)

"This is such a heart warming write that it brought a picture of my father in the kitchen.
In that one paragraph the writer has drawn the looks of the character, his mood,
the work he is doing; along with the atmosphere, aroma and the things that he is
using. Each line has got vivid images for the reader to see rather then
to imagine. I also like the way this poem ended. It has a soft touch to it. Nicely written." (4)

"As I read this, I was slowly drawn into that kitchen, watching each movement as described by the writer. You can feel love in these words and memories. It is amazing that one simple act of "chopping vegetables" can turn into something so beautiful. There is nothing else that I can say other than I loved this and other writers should pay attention to how emotions and feelings can be conveyed with just the words that actually describe what is happening." (10)

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Intrustion
by Saerelune
10+10 = 20

"The opening to this piece is emotional as it first makes me nervous for you, wondering what these strangers are searching for, and it's a brilliant opening once the rest of the poem is read. What breaks my heart is the fact that depression is a disease, but I've heard it described as an invisible disease. And I feel too often, people don't take it seriously, or they think it is something one can simply "get over". I agreee that the metaphor of depression is powerful, quite profound as depression is that intrusive to people, something one must deal with daily. The ending saddens my heart, and the way you end it with repeating those lines is thought-provoking. I think there is still a stigma about mental illnesses as people may not feel comfortable or even know much about them. Your tone in this piece really reaches to the reader and the first time I read it, I was speechless. To hear depression put like that, like you wrote, gives this sense of vulnerability and also reveals how fragile a person is. How the mind can haunt and be beyond our control it seems. Powerful poem." (10)

"This poem has such a haunting feel to it. The aches it presents pulls the reader
in effortlessly. The one that really stood out for me was this:
No disease, skin like pearls.
And depression is the oyster
clamping around its treasure.
^^Here depression has been given a lovely image for such a heavy emotion
that sucks us into its world. I also like the repetition as it allows the reader to
hear the writer's voice and share her pain. A very touching poem that kept
me glued to the writer..take care." (10)

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Too Deep
by Adreamer

"I tried googling what inspired you, the work by Ian Thomas, but I could not find the reference so I am interested as to what it was. This conversation between the two characters is quite enlightening. The opening line of "your poetry is lonely" takes my breath away, because for someone to discern that and read behind the lines is remarkable to me. What are our aspirations as writers? I think it may be common that we try to fill an emptiness inside, or write away the loneliness at least. I love how honest and genuine your voice is, it's gives such a realistic tone and by simply saying "I know" and "I'm sorry" shows that perhaps you don't know how to feel less alone, and you don't want to hurt this man. The images of the typewriter are beautiful and a bit somber, as I imagine the sounds being made for the sake of filling the silence. I am also intrigued by the mention of "that's the last she said to me"... maybe it was the man's wife? What really struck with me is the wisdom he gives in saying that we must not think everyone's out to get us. How true is that? We can become almost paranoid, worried, and anxious about our actions and how they are perceived. There was a bit of mystery in this write I found, but it adds to the piece and makes me want to know more about this character, and what story this character will write down. I think keeping track and journaling can be a thoughtful and healing process, especially if one is trying to work through something. A very heartfelt piece." (7)

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Back Down South
by Colm

"What a creative poem about Texas country from an Irishman! The fact that I feel he really grasped the culture so easily in this poem was really interesting for me! I laughed at the thought of veering off left when trying to help navigate the map, as it's a common occurrence in a vehicle with me! This was truly just a feel good poem with a lot of integrity and character built into it, and I love every aspect of it. Great ending, wrapped up nicely but not abrupt. The images were spot on and I imagined myself living in a country song. Love this!" (10)

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Neurotic
by Britt

"Oh Mercy, Britt!

This poem makes me want to soak in the tub! Of course I'm being silly but seriously this poem makes you think on so many levels and emotions, which is why it's chosen as one of my top three this week.

Being obsessed with bathing and the pure enjoyment is enough and then adding possibly a loved one in the mix is very enjoyable to read within this small poem, which is very powerful as well.

Many meanings to this poem or can be taken from this piece, such as; "drunk" in bubbles at a memory of someone they wish to forget perhaps or like I said above, the thoughts of a loved one..

The metaphors are beautiful and very captivating!" (7)

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Existence
by Baby Rainbow

"Small poem by Saffie this week, raw, simplistic and to the point= LOVE IT!

The author of this poem as a gift for telling it like it is and how she is feeling at the moment, which is why she is so adored by many on this site, very talented writer and this poem can relate to all readers.

The brink of loneliness and pure exhaustion of feeling alone in the universe, it's a powerful emotion expressed in lovely, simplistic form.

This poem stands out on so many levels, I had to highlight it this week!" (4)

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Poetry Junkie
by Baby Rainbow

"Its the title that caught my attention and the feelings in this poem is shared by
writers of all ages. I guess as writers, poets etc we all share this point of view and
yes we do get lost in other peoples' world, get involved with their feelings and see
what they see. Its so easy to loose ourselves within each poem written and at the
same time take something away or even instill inspiration within each one of us.
Really enjoyed this gem. Well done!" (7)

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Conversation
by Nourayasmine

"Although I am pretty sure I know what the "war" is here, it really could be anything. The "war" could be something as mundane as the families of the two people don't agree with the relationship; perhaps one of the persons is married to another, thus a "war". I am sure none of these ideas were intended by the writer. In any event it is a touching write and does say to me that at least for a while as long as these two talk, the "war" is forgotten and love is there." (7)

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Our Time Will Come
by Maher

"I am repeating a vote and comments for this poem this week. I was so taken with it, that I feel it should be given more recognition as it does deserve it.
Comments from previous week: I am not going to try and analyze every word or meaning/message of this poem. It is one of the best I have read on the site in a very long time. Professionally presented and reminds me of some of the old masters of poetry (Keats, Blake, Coleridge, especially Shelley to name a few). The title implies that time will come for two people who love each other to be together and/or it also could be about turmoil in world and the experiences of people during that time and in the end after all is said and done, their time will come to live in peace. I have not nor can I do this justice with comments that I might make so my final comment is that this write is worthy of gracing the front page of P&Q. I hope everyone will read this and enjoy as much as I did." (4)

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Nubilose
by The Princess

"The vocabulary in this poem is what made me fall in love. It's wordy without being wordy, if that makes sense (not stuffy). I immediately felt like this was a woman who had to flee her country, and change everything about herself for her own safety. I love the part about the painting. There is memory and sadness here that is just incredible. I've read this poem probably fifteen times and fall in love a little bit more each time it's read. Beautifully written!" (7)

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There Wasn't You
by Colm

"This poem pretty much shattered my heart. Sad poems are hard to get through emotionally as it is, but when you write of a funeral and write it just so eloquently, with sadness and beauty, it's heartbreaking. This poem definitely tugged at my emotions in ways the other poems on the list hadn't. I love the part about listening to myself listening to the hymns and prayers. What a gorgeous concept. Truly a beautifully crafted poem." (4)

Thanks judges and jane, congrats everyone :)

Congrats all

Well done winners, and HMs. _*_*_*_

And thank you judges!

Congrats!!! :)

Congratulations to everyone else who won and the HM's.

Fantastic poems, congrats everybody!

Thanks so much for your lovely comments, judges. Apologies I'm late, I've been distracted by the battle raging overhead!