Is this considered acceptable?

My stomach is churning after watching this....surely there are other forms of punishment for a 5 year old?

http://www.9news.com.au/world/2016/04/16/09/26/mum-hits-out-after-principal-paddles-her-five-year-old

Woah, that's scary and makes me hurt for the child. I don't have any insight into the mind of a five-year-old (don't know child psychology) or if this would have an effect later on.

I am not for corporal punishment. I hadn't really paid much attention to this debate but just looked and sure enough, FOX news at posted an article about this and was shown on my newsfeed. One of the highest comments (almost 10,000 likes) was:

"America is getting too soft and someone needs to discipline the kids if their parents won't.. The difference between wrong and right is very scarce in the current generation. Children need to know the difference and if that results to physical punishment, then so it shall be. There needs to be a line of respect between a child and an adult and to kids, being told their actions are wrong might not be enough"

- I was kind of shaking my head in disbelief. I mean I get being defensive about these things, but I feel like this is always the remarks. "America is getting too loose, not strict enough", etc. I feel like that's a poor excuse. It's also drawing a thin line between "teaching" and "physical violence".

Obviously there needs to be rules in schools but I feel the school has no right to do ANYTHING physical as in regard to that. I can't even imagine being a parent and being told your child was smacked repeatedly. I would be so concerned as to how my child felt inside (not only that it hurt).

Again, this could be all my bias based on what I've seen or experienced and my opinion.

Besides saying I don't think anyone should be able to decide what the parent would or wouldn't do as it's the parent's responsibility in the end, and there are other ways to teach the child about respect in schools... I also don't see the benefits of spanking. I'm not saying here, oh you're going to turn out horrible or this or that. I see a lot of posts on my Facebook about how this person was glad and proud they were spanked because that was teaching real respect. Really?? Okay, I was spanked a lot that I can remember growing up (more than my brother). Not blaming here but just a realization. My mom was always completely against it although she never stopped him because he kind of "decided" and "enforced" the punishments. They later shared with me that they didn't agree on discipline and didn't talk about it at all before having children. So they had differing views. I think a huge factor may be if spanking was as a "reminder" to behave, or done in anger. For me, spanking was my father's way of getting out HIS anger. It wasn't just a quick smack but over and over. It kind of makes you feel totally defenseless, because if you say anything or try to speak it may count as "talking back". It may even make a child feel embarrassed if done at a certain age or older, like for me, or if the parent makes you pull down your pants, etc. It never taught me anything but fear of my father at certain times and not wanting to speak up for fear of him doing anything else. That's not healthy and it hurts my heart that a child so young who may not be able to even comprehend certain things has to deal with that.

I'm not against a parent giving their child a little smack on the backside (no where else) if they are acting up but...here in Australia at least, a parent using an object such as a paddle, which you can see the principal using, would most certainly be charged with child abuse.

Having another adult hold him in place while the punishment is handed down will surely have a long term effect on this child. Four of my grandchildren are 5 and over and they all remember things that happened prior to the age of five. Didn't we have a thread on your earliest memory recently and most said they remember events when they were younger than 5?

The mother was there in the room and was told the child would be suspended without punishment and she would then be jailed for truancy....I'm not sure who told her that, or what her circumstances are but, I know I could not have stood by and watched this take place to ANY child let alone my own.

Omg I haven't really heard about his up until you posted about it Hellon and I started the video heard what the prom pila ad to say,and then the boy start crying and that was before anything happened and had to turn it off because i was in tears for that child, my heart literally,aches right now for him, as a mother and a aunt.
Here in the UK that would be punishable by a prison sentence but for the mother to stand there and film it is wrong too. I for one would rather get a truancy order or whatever put against me and the possibility of going to jail than anybody touch my child like that.

I have just watched the video and I feel sick. I mean one of them was actually laughing. This is beyond wrong and they should all be locked up and never be allowed to work with children again. What kind of messed up society condones this kind of behaviour? The poor child was pleading with his mother for help and all she does is watch. I want to slap all of them - hard!

I am so angry right now!

I really would like to know why the mother just recorded this incident rather than do something about it? Is she looking for some sort of pay out while her child is very obviously stressed out?

Hellon my reply to that is most likely yes. She's disgusting. To watch any child get hurt is wrong but your own their are no words for it...

I don't personally know a single person who would find this okay.

I was spanked as a child - three times when it was a serious offense (on my part), and I was a wild kid that probably deserved more haha. But it was always a smack on the butt, hard enough to sting but not really hurt, and never done in anger. MA, I'm sorry to hear what happened to you. That isn't discipline, that is abuse.

I do not understand how all the adults involved were not charged with assault, even the mom, or with aiding & abetting.

I cannot remember how many times I was paddled from 6th grade through freshman. (Too many to count) That was the norm then. Even so I don't know of any kid getting it in the lower grades at all!

5 years old!?!?!

Charge them with assault & bar them from the educational system forever!

Wow, that's all, sorry, but I got a lot worse then that in catholic school and in public school, now do I condone it, not really, but I do know one thing and it can't be denied, corporal punishment in the schools led to a lot less disrespect. Shit many of you probably never dealt with old school nuns, they didn't need paddles, their hands were like boards and then you got the ruler later on......there's a saying, discipline your kids early so prison guards don't have to later on.

as far as I'm concerned there was only two things done wrong here, as Mr. Darcy alluded to, laughing, and the other one was pleading with the child, spank his ass and be done with it, then afterwards tell him why and encourage him not to do it again, actions have consequences......

Http://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/04/spanking.aspx

I don't have kids, but I don't plan on ever being physically violent with them. I guess we'll see. I build systems of trust and respect with animals so that even the slightest growl in my voice puts them in their place. I'd like to attempt the same approach with my kids. Positive reinforcement and patience, so when I'm upset, the shame is enough of a lesson.

I didn't watch the video. I know how upset it would make me.

^great philosophy, I spanked my son on the butt but only in extreme circumstances, now that he's five I won't, I spanked my 3 year old today, because he ran out a door and was heading to the street, he knows better, when he turns five hopefully it will never be necessary again. I use the same method that I used while working with the developmentally disabled, fading and extinction and a reward system for listening, now with my 5 year old, I can look at him a certain way, and he knows, that and the tone of my voice, the youngest one, it's going to be harder, because he has a lot of behavioral problems.....

My 15 year old respects me when I look at him a certain way or speak in a particular tone. The reason he respects me and behaves well is because of the way I act. I did not hit him when he was a child and I won't hit him now. There are more intelligent ways to show a child of any age what is right or wrong. If you hit your child you only show him that this is an acceptable way to behave. Do we need more socially defunct people with poor moral standards?

Yeah and there are some people who don't believe in medical treatment, who are you to declare them immoral, what works for you, doesn't work for everyone and vice-versa, we can't all be religious zealots or morally sound parents like you.....I doubt very seriously if my sons grow up to be socially defunct with poor moral standards if I live long enough to instill in them the values and principles that lead to good moral standards......I take your comment very offensively, and can't believe you of all people would make such a statement, then again, I actually can......

I don't like to step in between you two gents here, but I think that this thread always had a flashing red light over it.
Some people believe in moderate physical discipline and certainly there is an argument to prove it works (let me reiterate 'moderate') and others don't - equally, there have been cases of extreme negative reactions because of it. In many cases, it depends on our own personal experience with it. For instance, if one person grew up getting smacked hard every time he put a foot out of line, he is never going to agree or look kindly on it in later years.
If another grows up who was subject to moderate discipline at extreme times, he may then look back and think 'yes, that taught me respect and is how I would like to bring my children up'
As I said on the transgender thread, we too often look for a right or wrong scenario and it often just isn't that black or white, so a certain amount of respect and understanding is due both sides of the argument.

All the best everyone

I was slapped/spanked as a kid by my mum, not often but I was a right little git and deserved every one of those slaps.
My Dad on the other hand was worse. He didn't hit, he offered a punishment or a 'clout'. I always chose punishment.
One time I had to clean his car with a toothbrush. I wished I had taken the slap instead.

I think parenting and society has moved on from physical violence. At school I was caned on the arse. It still hurts, I was dragged out of a classroom by the ear and had blackboard rubbers thrown at me. (Luckily missed everytime)
I was more concerned that my parents would find out from the teachers and I would get the same treatment at home.
These days teachers can't do anything and there are a number of parents who believe it is the schools job to discipline the kids. Therefore the kids aren't afraid of either the teachers or their parents.

About 9 years ago I slapped my daughter on the butt when she was out of control. She cried more out of shock than pain.
I wish I hadn't done it the very moment I did it. That is the only time I have ever used physical discipline with my three kids. I still regret it now.
(She doesn't remember it luckily)

I find other ways to punish them.
The easiest way is to take something off them for a day.
My daughter now loses her phone if she is bad.
One time all three of my kids were arguing and fighting. I unplugged the broadband for a day.
My youngest daughter is the worst for pushing the boundaries. If I take something off her, she finds something else to amuse herself. If I put her on the step she sings for 9 mins. She is a work in progress, she is naughty everyday, (minor things like trying to shave the cat or colouring her face in black with a sharpie) Once she stripped to her knickers and coloured herself in green to look like a gremlin.
She still doesn't get a slap.

Hellon I haven't watched the video, since becoming a father things like these effect me more than they should.

Children were sent to try us it seems...

Bob, I apologise for offending you. This is a topic that induces strong opinions and is a worthy debate, but I can see how my statement would of offended you, so again I apologise for doing that.

Whilst I concede that smacking a child occasionally is considered acceptable by many, I still believe that when this occurs it is a loss of parental control. Of course there is a huge difference between a few smacks in a child's lifetime and the regular physical punishments that can cause issues for the child in later life. There is much evidence of the detrimental effects of regular physical punishment, this link explains my point: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/09/18/adrian-peterson-corporal-punishment-science_n_5831962.html

Edit - 'Loss of control' what I mean by this, is 'arguably' there are equally effective non-physical ways to teach your child. Punishing when feeling angry is a loss of control, especially if that anger is displayed physically towards the child.

Yeah, physical punishments. That's why there are criminals in the world! There is nothing that can justify you hitting a small, helpless kid. This is just sick and cruel and inhumane.

Bob, pure Skinnerian reinforcement. Reward positive behavior, ignore disruptive behavior (extinction). Ignore, ignore ignore, but if you have to be negative be clearly so and explain why (actually Skinner would not condone explaining); where true safety issues arise be negative as hell. (Also rewarding desired behavior somewhat randomly is especially powerful.)
The problem here is that they are following a negative reinforcement schedule, one so severe and out of proportion that it must necessarily reinforce the problem behavior - not in the way it ocurred, most likely but it will manifest in another situation.

You know why I refuse to hit my children after they turn five, because I grew up in an alcoholic family and was severely battered more times than I could ever tell you, that's not discipline, that's child abuse, but back then it was acceptable.....Now if I spank my son on the butt, it's usually because he has done something that caused a very unsafe situation, like running out the door in the and running into the street, or hitting his brother in the head with an object, sometimes you have to get their attention because talking to them, and time outs don't work, parents can and do get carried away with physical punishments, I make sure I talk to him afterwards and tell him why and what could happen. Besides even though I'll never tell them, it hurts me a lot worse than it hurts them, because it's not like I wail them, matter of fact I can just softly tap my younger ones butt and he starts crying because he knows he's screwed up and disappointed me..............either way, everyone has to do what works for them, as long as it's not abusive, but these days some people see everything as abusive and/or negative....But if it comes to spanking my child or him running out in the street getting hit by a car, guess what choice I'm making.

The mother should have her child taken away for one, and the principal should be banned from teaching or being a principal ever again. I do not like kids but this is WAY out of line.

But

It's the south so they live by their own rules and nothing will be done. Shrug