Weekly Contest Winners July 18 2016

Good Morning Ladies and Gentlemen here are the awaited
results! Congratulations to our front page holders: Ms.
Sunshine, Sir Lancelot and Naughtymouse and to all the
HM's!! Thank you judges for your time to make this
weekly contest a success!

WINNERS:

Un-Ode to Burden by Ms Sunshine

Didn't you? By Sir Lancelot

Religious Fools by Naughtymouse

COMMENTS:

Un-Ode to Burden by Ms Sunshine aka Rania Moallem

This poem was dreamy, mystical and magical... I adore
the word usage within this piece!

The "crystals and rainbow ice" are very powerful within
this poem... because the underlined message within is
the sorrow and burdens of the person.. The world wants
to see sunshine, even when the sun feels cloudy.... just
my thoughts. Truly adored this poem! (7 points)
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Un-Ode to Burden by Ms Sunshine aka Rania Moallem

The imagery in this piece is the aspect that catches my
eye the most. I was intrigued by the lighthearted nature
to the descriptions and how the connotations of nearly
every word were something at least pleasant while
the purpose of this piece was certainly not to entertain - I
suppose all I mean to say is that I enjoy the juxtaposition
here as well as the effort to write in a pleasing manner
while conveying much more depth. There are a few ways that I was able to take this piece, and that is something
that truly allows poetry to transcend from generation to
generation as well as from author to audience. I was absolutely entranced by this piece this week, and I'm
so sorry I don't have more to say about it, I am just
so speechless. (7 points)
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Didn't you? by Sir Lancelot

This piece was very mind blowing and thought provoking!
This was a fresh, new twist on the tragic illnesses that
plague the minds of thousands! I was captivated with
each and every line. Words used such as hazy and
drizzle are perfect for the visual display of the message
and then to end it with the reality of love... just perfect!
(10 points)
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Didn't you? by Sir Lancelot

Simple and complex, both at once. The structure and
making-of your lines is a spot-on. I was touched as
your words influenced my own emotions with how naked
YOUR emotions were. I really found your style worth of
being distinguished this week. The closing words were
somehow your best, although every verse of your mini
verses had their own touch and impact. Well done.
(7 points)

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Religious Fools by Naughtymouse

This piece is a powerful one. It's very raw and to the
point... uncovering the darkness and corruption that can
be clouded in the name of religion... Poems such as this
are easily overlooked ... it hurts to read the truth of
darkness and yet poems such as this powerful piece can
shed new light and hope to all of humanity if we indeed
are on the search for peace. Excellent write by Ben this week! (4 points)
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Religious Fools by Naughtymouse

While I will admit that I have always favored the views
of this author, and I myself am not religious, I fear that
far too many people in this day feel the same way as
Naughtymouse does now. In a very interesting way he managed to capture both sides of the argument (at least
in my eyes) and I love how the sarcasm and various
techniques for emphasis really do make this piece come
alive. The structure is a little wobbly and the length is a little
too much for my taste; however, I still believe that it
is a poignant write completely worthy of representing this week in the PnQ community.

The world is in an awkward phase and there is no way to
know what is coming, but religion and its toll are definitely
going to have an effect on the outcomes of this chapter.
Much like the crusades, I fear naughtymouse has hit the
nail on the head and poetry has been used as not only a
vent, but a true piece of potentially vital historic
recollection of where we currently stand. And while I am
well aware that the poetic population of the world at
present is much more vast than that of our home here, I
do honestly feel that this is one write that could stand the
tests of time and perception. Extremely well conveyed,
stunning admission of opinion, and highly effective word
choice truly set this piece above others. (10 points)

HM's:

Abusers & Terrorists by Larry Chamberlin the Godfather

Her Garden at 6:00 am by GB

Tattooed by Britt

Cloud Gazing by Ether

Missing by Poetess

Je Suis by Poet on the Piano

Uncertainty by Ether

What is it Like by JaM

COMMENTS:

Abusers & Terrorists by Larry Chamberlin the Godfather

This is a Syntuit poem. A three line poem with 17
syllables, where the first two lines combine to build a
statement and the third comes to an intuitive conclusion.
It is not limited to subject or theme. (See http://www.poems-andquotes.com/discussion/topic.html
topic_id=144435 for more details surrounding this
style of poem)I have only recently come to respect and
admire the beauty and impact that this and other short style
poems make when sat beside the more widely known
traditional styles. This particular poem stood out for me
because it is so powerful and current particularly with the escalation of terrorism currently in the news. It is
punchy, thought provoking and it hits hard like a bullet.
So often the eyes reveal so much of what is going on inside.
Yet it has been said that the worst type of murderer often
has cold dead eyes which could explain that lack of soul.
Certainly anyone with a soul could not do the terrible acts
that are committed in unfortunately an ever increasing
spiral of today's times.

This poem for me has so much packaged into so few
words and it follows the rules of the Syntuit form. It is in
line with current news and I feel that it deserves 7.
(7 points)
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Abusers & Terrorists (syntuit) by Larry Chamberlin the Godfather

This is absolutely nailed. It states a very vast issue, in a very small poem.

"Unless you are found not to have one.."

It's to small, so powerful. It really hit hard, and has it's own wake-up call.
I believe it should be printed out and spread all around the regions, it could keep
some people quite and make others speak. (4 points)

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Her Garden at 6:00 am by GB

Despite the creative format, this piece was the most
captivatingly non heart breaking piece I found this week.
No pun intended, but it was a much needed breath of
fresh air amongst a terrible time. While I appreciate
capturing history on the page for future poets, historians,
and other various souls to come, there is a point when that
sorrow becomes too much to read at once. Especially coming from so many different views, so this piece
(which was written with an incredible sense of imagery)
was able to bring me to something at least slightly comforting. It was able to show me love and beauty in
the world around me that is shrouded by an unstoppable
force of chaos right now, and undoubtedly will be again. I love how Jasmine is capitalized, which gave me the illusion "She" has a name of Jasmine, or is often represented by Jasmine, which is a creative take I have not seen utilized here in a while. Even if this was not the author's intention, it was a nice touch, as was the dash after born, I have to say I have not seen many haiku styled pieces that are punctuated so... liberally? Informally? Imperatively? Honestly, I'm not sure what word fits best or if any of those three are capable of capturing the essence I mean to convey. Anyway, to make a long story short, this piece was phenomenal and just what PnQ needed. (4 points)

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Tattooed by Britt

There is something so familiar in the words of this, "not implying plagiarism at all". The familiarity is a faith based intention. Tattooed with faith that all things are possible and there is still hope and time. Hope this is what is implied. Beautiful poem. (4 points)

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Cloud Gazing by Ether

"the clouds change shape,
and dump their contents;
my eyes change colour,
and dump their contents."

^^^^My favorite stanza. It is so deep and allows the
reader in emotionally for the change in the relationship,
and that it is heartbreaking for the writer. I do not like to
see "I" in lower case, though I felt the lower case I was significant in the "insignificance" the writer is trying to portray of them self. (7 points)
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Missing by Poetess

"...maybe in a way that the sun regrets
not having been a little warmer
on your coldest days."

^^^^ Chills! This stanza is the perfect addition to the
poem. It is the bone gnawing reminder that someone is missed terribly. It is obvious there was a deep love, not passionate kind, but a love for the person you are missing.
I found the poem difficult to read because it brought floodgates of memories and loved ones. So eloquently stated that there never are the "right" words to describe
how you miss someone, you just know you do. (10 points)
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Je Suis by Poet on the Piano

This was a very powerful piece. I was hesitating at
some points, especially when it shifted from a poem to
a speech to a more modern voice (speaking one's mind
up) but it was just too powerful. The word choice was touching on different levels.

Strong and creative in some lines, deep and raw in
others, and direct to touching in some other ones.

The poem perhaps speak on behalf of so many others.
It shows a face of soul-awakening, eye-opening to the
chaos of terror we and everyone else is living in.

This is nailed. (10 points)
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Uncertainty by Ether

This one attracted my attention because of the fluid
rhyming and hints of things unspoken. "Immediately
the reader is struck by the first lines of the stanza

"The corners of the lips unfold" immediately you get a
sense that there is tension between the two. That the speaker is arrogant in his self-belief and disdainful of
the person he is speaking to. He puts voice to the words
that he believes the other will say in accusation, maybe he
is just reiterating what has been said before yet it is also possible that he has perhaps unwittingly revealed something of the conflict and imbalance, a glimpse of the turmoil in
his head.

The second Stanza raises a number of thoughts in the reader from Frankenstein's monster to blood covered murderers, He reminds his accuser that he has already previously seen clues of blood on the floor and expressed concern that the origins of the blood remain unknown. This opened up many possibilities as to why this would be the case and caught my interest even more.

The last Stanza implies that there is so much more at stake than the accuser knows and asks if he knew the state of his brain would he still look at him the same way.

For me that opened up so many possibilities. Could it be that things are much worse than the accuser thinks or is it completely the opposite? Maybe the truth is that he isn't a murderer but doing something for the good of mankind but like every crazy scientist there is a price to pay and that is the crux of the inner conflict.

All in all, this poem gave me a good run for my money. It gave just enough information to tantalise the imagination had a good theme and a nice rhythm and rhyme to it. I found it to be fresh and entertaining. It has been a difficult judging week with more than 30 poems to read and analyse each with their own varied merits but I felt that this poem diserved a mention and at least a 4. (4 points)
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What is it Like by JaM

A perceptive, well written poem that demonstrates the
Poet's literary skill and clearly portraying the insightful image of what it feels like to suffer inside. The first
Stanza.. The question

'Do they know what it's like? Visuals emerge inside my head"

Immediately brings the reader into the writers head.
The swift dive into chaos and the overwhelming feelings
of anxiety and suffocation; For someone who has never suffered such a condition it seems like an all-consuming
hell and this is nicely portrayed. How often do people
stand in groups and stare or comment on an individual's behavior or appearance that doesn't quite fit into their perceived image of normal.

The question

"Do you really know what it's like?

Pops up throughout the poem and works well to remind the reader to consider what it is like to suffer from this condition.

The stanza.....

"Be thankful you don't walk,
Even a mile in these shoes.
Because then you might understand,
What it's like, to have to choose".

Is a thought that I have I have often heard announced on the lips of those who suffer from any number of invisible illnesses.

The final stanza reveals all too sadly the truth that many people who suffer thus, do finally choose to stay at home alone and avoid the social activities that most of us take for granted.

I gave this poem 10 points because I believe that it was well written and portrayed the subject well whilst at the same time raising an important point that people are not always healthy just because they look so on the outside. (10 Points)

The comments are honestly priceless, I really appreciate every word. Thank you judges for your consideration and indepth review..

Humbling poetry everyone.

Thank you for posting Meena <3

Congratulations winners and HMs, thank you Mark and Ingrid for nominating my poetry, thank you judge for the lovely comment.

I think the punctuation regarding the Haiku is a controversial matter and perhaps of personal preference, "Jasmine" was capitalized on purpose, I appreciate recognizing these tiny details so much :)

Congratulations all

I want to say well done to EVERYONE this week, I've read all of these, each a few times and how the judges make their minds up I have no Idea, I'd like to thank judges and congratulate everyone mentioned on this post, stunning poems this week!

Great Job guys!

Thank you to the judges and congratulations to the other winners and hms.

SL

Thank you for the sweet comment on my poem, judge. Love your interpretation, and that definitely does play into my intent :) I'm a pretty easy read, haha!

Thank you judges & host! <3

Great week, I love how so many diverse pieces got highlighted!

Thanks for the comment and nomination!

Congrats to everyone. :)

Thanks for the comments, judges! Very much appreciated.

Congrats to all the winners & HMs. Rania, it's fitting you win the week you say goodbye to LTFR.

Thanks, judges & Meena for posting.

Lol you're comments kill me

Congratulations to all! Thanks so much, judge, for the comment. And thank you Meena for posting!