Breaking

  • Colm
    7 years ago, updated 7 years ago

    Everybody baffled as pigs start to fly

    Sensational video footage is emerging purporting to show common pigs across the world taking to the skies. The bizarre scenes seem to back up several eyewitness accounts which claim that pigs have begun sprouting wings and flying to freedom. We caught up with some bystanders to get their opinion on what has caused the sudden change in porcine behaviour.

    ‘Such migration is symptomatic of a species of pig who are really fearing a hard Brexit. They are flying away from the UK to mainland Europe because they support the free market and want to remain within the fiscal space of the CAP,’ theorised a leading economist.

    Controversial President Donald Trump was less than amused by reports of Hispanic pigs flying over the border into Texas by the hundreds. ‘Those pigs are flying over my wall?! I’ll show those cocky b@*#@*#s. Hey, Pencey, get me an executive order to sign allowing them to be shot on sight. Get the photographers and those important-looking guys in suits. We will beat illegal immigration of pigs and make America great again.’

    A leading scientist at NASA had a shorter explanation. ‘Aliens,’ he remarked delightfully. ‘Aliens!’

    Finally, a self-proclaimed ‘kinda-poet’ has an interesting, if enigmatic explanation. ‘Janis has returned to PnQ.’ Our in-house cryptologist claims that there is an 87% chance that this statement is a whimsical, and/or possibly-offensive metaphor.

    We will have more information as it arrives.

    #pigsfly

  • Narph replied to Colm
    7 years ago

    A+

  • silvershoes
    7 years ago

    5/5

  • Britt
    7 years ago, updated 7 years ago

    Hahahahaha, yes!

  • Melpomene
    7 years ago

    Yes! Love this.

  • abracadabra
    7 years ago

    Wowz! I'll return with my critical analysis within 48 hours or so.