Weekly Contest Winners - February 20, 2017!

Hope you all have a safe and wonderful start to the week! Huge congratulations to Karla, Larry and Thomas for their front page win, not to mention all of the other amazing poets and poems highlighted. Thank you to all the judges for voting and giving their time, and also to the other mods who helped this week in making sure everything ran smoothly :)

WINNERS:

“Whiteness” by: Karla 10 + 10 + 7 = 27 points
“The Patriot” by: Larry Chamberlin 10 + 10 = 20 points
“Old Furniture” by: Thomas 7 + 4 + 4 = 15 points

COMMENTS:

“Whiteness” by: Karla

“Just so much YES to this poem. For once, I actually don’t want to comment or critique, which, to me, is a sign that I have felt something too deeply to articulate, to mar with my words. I wish I could write like this, to know like this, to have this understanding relationship with myself and with poetry. Karla’s writing flashes knives and lights fires, yet it seems to be done with a shrug of the shoulders and a sigh. Superb. I’ll be revisiting it.” (10)

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“What a wonderful piece of writing this is and it resonated with me as much as anything I've ever read on this site. That wonderful words are simply all around us or that a page is much more than just a blank sheet of 'whiteness', but rather an infinite amount of possibilities waiting to be discovered, really is a fascinating concept. All it takes is the right person with equal amounts of sensitivity and talent, and these words can be pulled into existence, placed in the right order and made into something beautiful. Karla has done just that with this piece.” (10)

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“Well like usual, Karla wrote another amazing poem. This time embracing the beauty of a blank page – finding the fragilities and the concrete within. It beckons to Karla with its call, that inspires her and the audience to unearth the sculpter within and pursue creativity.” (7)

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“The Patriot” by: Larry Chamberlin

“This is a well rhymed-poem written about politics, showcasing the emotions of the narrator; especially, the pride for his country.

The lines:

"Balances and checks will hold to our course,
It matters little who keeps warm the seat."

these lines allude that Power doesn't fall in the hands of just one individual, but rather, it's distributed among many.
Hence, if whoever is elected to "keep warm the seat," and in turn, turns to be unqualified for the position or attempts to gain more power than the constitution grants, the people shouldn't lose hope. If anything, they should feel proud for a country that has its balances and checks working correctly to make sure that whatever decisions are taken are constitutional and for the benefit of the people, but also, that people's voices are heard.

This stanza speaks volumes:

"Yet the flag waves in breeze as music plays
?my heart swells in pride despite bad choices;?
the air itself is electric with praise?
glory to people raising their voices."

--Hurray for the people!! (That's as much as I can say.)

Larry's poem gives hope and manages to transmit a good sense of patriotism.” (10)

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"There is a lot to this poem, much more than my words could do it justice. Not only is it coherent and well structured, but also very touching, visual, and patriotic.

The emotions are flooting all over the poem without the need to even make it dramatic. I was just mesmerized by how inspiring this piece could get.

A wonderful piece, and this really has to be on the front. Every person from every nationality has to read this poem at least once.

Thanks for sharing." (10)

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“Old Furniture” by: Thomas

“This is just my kind of poem. The details are mundane and vivid, solid and sublime, and so very important. They are carefully selected and expertly layered upon each other, illustrating, drawing us in. Each adjective is placed with restraint and intent. The writing is so well paced, unforced, plain. It lays down the groundwork for the meaning to take effect with greatest impact.
This is a simple story of how in bright, fresh suburbia, the old and rejected find refuge in a couple’s car: a unique, beautifully ordinary story that gives much pause for reflection.” (7)

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“I have to be honest and just say right from the off that I'm always a little dubious about these sorts of writes as they border on prose. Beautifully told, but arguably prose, nonetheless. However, I don't want to get too involved in the 'where does poetry leave off and become prose' debate as the truth is, none of us can really say and it's down to personal choice anyway. In my own opinion, this is so well written in such a masterfully reflective way that it is certainly elevated to poetry. What is poetry if not beauty anyway?
A seemingly simple car journey that amounts to a collection of 'vinyl records and a coffee table' but so intricately told that I felt like I was there.” (4)

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"Lord. I loved the poem starting from its title, the furniture and old words combined instantly gave me a sense or coziness and emotions before going through the poem.

There is always so much to the things that we surround us and that fills our place. Sometimes its what they represent that makes us question where will all these stuff go, where all the memories will end up at.

The best thing about this poem is its wide spec, readers have the freedom to read this as a personal story by the reader and get emotional, or take this as their very own reminder and get their thoughts provoked.

Beautiful description and beautiful word choice.

Anywhere they go, I hope we aint forgotten.

Well written." (4)

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HM’S:

“Where are you now?” by: Peter Edwards = 10 points
“Breviloquent” by: Aegis 4 + 4 = 8 points
“Through Space and Time” by: Alex Penuelas = 7 points
“Insomniacs” by: Ren = 7 points
“Fragmentation” by: hiraeth = 7 points
“An Appetite for Beauty” by: Ben Pickard = 4 points

COMMENTS:

“Where are you now?” by: Peter Edwards

“This poem did an absolutely phenomenal job at depicting the speaker’s feelings. The narrative grew morose with each verse. This poem affected me in a deep way, although I don’t have any loved ones with dementia, it is surely a startling thought. Watching someone you love slowly lose their mental facilities, until they no longer recognize you is cruelty. I hope a cure is found for this disease. Peter did an excellent job with this write.” (10)

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“Breviloquent” by: Aegis

“Aegis has been pumping out wonderful short poems. It’s a testament to his skill to weave such intricate pieces of poetry with a handful of words. This piece is evident of that.” (4)

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“Been getting to know this author a fair bit through being a judge and I can see that there is often a pattern in his writing. Almost always there is a main image/theme, simply dressed, that forms the main body of the poem and is lightly twisted towards the end as a metaphor/simile for a deep, specific sentiment. This pattern has again been adopted well here, and though I would be interested in seeing Aegis experiment a different style, I also understand that a winning formula doesn’t need to be tampered with. He writes with a keen, creative and sensitive poet’s heart, yet there is much composure to the writing. Always admirable.” (4)

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“Through Space and Time” by: Alex Penuelas

“It seems as per this particular poem that in order to fully admired something (in this case, a person), one must understand its origins. In other words, in order to admire beauty, one must understand it.

I found this piece to be filled with wonderful imagery and written eloquently.

Very well done. I admired (no pun intended) poems written with simplicity.
I also liked how this piece sounds genuine.” (7)

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“Insomniacs” by: Ren

“A mesmerising little write with imagery to spare, packed into a very small space.
Anybody who has ever suffered from insomnia should have a read of this and you will find the condition summed up rather neatly!

By the way, 'somnolent light' really is very good. The idea of light itself being drowsy and sleepy is a wonderful use of personification. Well done.” (7)

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“Fragmentation” by: hiraeth

"My favorite detail here is the fact that the fragmentation poem was made by fragments.

Those poems that make you think and reread and do noises are just so teasing and inspiring. This is one of them.

It's a flawless piece stitched with emotions and statements, although I did stumble upon certain lines, but not cause they were hard to receive but for their beauty and depth.

Frankly, I do admire this style and more precisely it's more than a style, it's an ID, the wording and general form shows the ID if its writer, as if you can spot it in the middle of a bunch of other poems.

Hats off!" (7)

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“An Appetite for Beauty” by: Ben Pickard

“I have to say that I'm not a fan of the word "fastidious" but I think that's on me.

Now as per my understanding of the poem, anyone who has an appetite for beauty will be able to smell not only what the poem is about, (mango) but also the lavender scent that the breeze brought.

In this case, I think I am not a fan of the word because I link the word fastidious to the word annoying instead of linking it to someone who is concerned with accuracy or cleanness.

And If I think that the narrator addresses the breeze as an annoying, I can't help but feel slightly offended, that's why I am not a fan of the word (but that's really just on me). Thankfully, I don't think that's what the narrator intends. Rather, I think the narrator implies that the artist creates with intend but when the art is created there are other factors that play a role in creating the art, not just what the artist intended. Meaning, much of the art is unintentional, and only a few will realize this, and similarity, only a few will truly appreciate this.” (4)

Well done everybody. Some great poems there! Much talent in PnQ.

Well done to the winners and all the hms this week. Thank you to the judge for their time on my poem.

Ben

Thanks judges. i'm honoured. it was Mia Couto who inspired me so much to reflect on poetry and write whiteness. Mia Couto is a great writer from Angola. congrats hm's. may poetry always save us from our now,from our fragile worlds,from our sadness. thanks again.

Thanks, judges, for the votes and especially for the comments. Thanks to Ben for nominating Patriot.
I have to say both judges nailed my intentions, which I think is unusual.

Congrats to Karla & Thomas & to the HMs.

Judges, it looks like Janis has fixed the contest issues just in time for your final week coming up. Thanks for all your dedication and persistence.

MaryAnn, thanks for hosting this week.

Congrats to the winners and HMs! Everyone here is so talented and write some amazing poems!
And thank you so much for the HM!