Poet of the Fortnight #7: Darren (August 18 - September 1)

Darren has been randomly selected as our seventh Poet of the Fortnight (PotF)! Darren is a talented artist and father living in the United Kingdom. He is an artist in more ways than one -- a poet AND a painter. Please welcome him to his own special thread, and be sure to read his latest poem posted just below:

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Tickling a dream, vomiting silence. (edited)

He took off his head,
like an old stench ridden
ill fitting hat

began poking around the crevices
Couldn't get in

grabbed a silver spoon
(Sheffield I think)
Popped out an eyeball
as easily as an onion from a jar

It rolled watching sky then floor
sky then floor
sky then dust
more dust
no more sky
just filth

(Now he was in)

He took hold of the dream by the corner
that one that promised so much
but never finished

the one where he was young
another chance at life
those different forks
many strange roads
most never trodden

pulling with all his might
seeing himself from his other eye
(the clean one)

he tugged the dream straight out
through the soggy socket
tearing a few lashes on the way
stretched it to a blur
turned it this way
then that

yet despite the effort
there was nothing after
that everyday interruption
the same spot as always

Just before she started to whisper
through a yarn stitched mouth

'my God those tear stained eyes'

'What is my truth?'

she could never say,
he soon realized
tossed the dream away
Wore his head again
quietly.
----

Darren, please fill out this public survey when you find time. You can pass any question/prompt in this thread, just write "Pass." I will ask 10 questions total throughout the next 2 weeks, and members of the community are encouraged to participate by asking questions of their own. Here's the survey:

Real name:
Meaning behind your PnQ name:
Birth place:
Languages spoken:
When you discovered PnQ and why you joined:
Favorite poet(s):
Book you are currently reading:
Song you last listened to:
Inspirations for writing:
5 truths about yourself:

Which one of your pieces of art are you most proud of?

Thanks Jane

loved the intro.

Real name
Darren Connor

My PnQ name is very unimaginative, I once changed it to 'Cloudy Mind' then 'Not a poet' on a previous account
(if memory serves me correctly)

I was born in Great Yarmouth England, a seaside resort that has seen better days.

I only speak English, Like a vast majority of British men my age we go abroad and expect everybody to speak English.

I discovered PNQ about 5 years ago I believe, I went through a poetry phase writing in notebooks, I was looking for somewhere to store them and receive feedback initially. PnQ seemed the easiest to navigate and the most laid back.

My favourite published poet is Ted Hughes, (I know he is a bit unpopular amongst poetry circles) My favourite PNQ poet is more difficult. I found Xanthe's work incredible, plus MyHalozChokinMe.
I only have about 5 poems in my favourite poems section, both poets above have one each in there
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/poems/1205724 (by Xanthe)
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/poems/1213444 (by MyHalozChokinMe)

I am currently reading book 6 from the game of thrones saga, I don't read as much as I should though.

The last song I listened to by choice was Blinded by the Sun by the Seahorses. A 90's indie band overshadowed by the whole britpop thing.

Inspirations for writing is a difficult one for me. I read somewhere that you should carry a notebook about with you and jot down inspirational thoughts or ideas. Poems tend to find me (as cliche as that sounds) I tend to think of one while driving. Even if it is just a title or first line, then I do my best to try and remember it.
Usually I forget, sometimes I remember and write it down, the poem then grows from that.

5 Truths

I have three children, I am lucky to have all three, my eldest was nearly born at 24 weeks, luckily the labour was stopped via drugs and he was born at 39 weeks. My eldest daughter (middle child) was born at 31 weeks and my youngest daughter was born at 29 weeks weighing just over 2lb. Both girls stayed in hospital for six weeks.

I am terrible at finishing anything. I have to force myself to finish a painting. None of my poems are finished and unless I have included 'edited' in the title they are first drafts. I spend too much time thinking about the task, then start all guns blazing, then get bored.

I was once in a band, I played bass and wrote music for a 5 piece band in my early twenties. We moved to London and rehearsed everyday. We had 20 original songs and had interest from a record company, an agent and financial backing.....then we had a major bust up with the lead singer and moved back to Great Yarmouth.

I have been married for 16 years (today) Time has gone so fast, my wife is probably a saint.

I was a terrible drunk, not an alcoholic just an animal when drunk. I haven't touched any alcohol in about 5 years now. How I have never been arrested is beyond me, just a few of my 'crimes'
I fell asleep walking home at 4 in the morning on a wall, one side of the wall was a dual carriageway the other a river. The police woke me up, asked me what I thought I was doing. I replied 'I was trying to sleep'
I once fell asleep on a train in London, I got on at Liverpool street and was supposed to get off at Walthamstow. I was awoken by a guard two stops further on after the train had terminated. In my wisdom I thought it would be a smart idea to sneak back onto the train and try and drive it back two stops to Walthamstow. I was caught and thrown out of the station again. I crept back in and fell asleep in a carriage. I was awoken by the train moving at 6 in the morning, it went all the way back to Liverpool street. Once it stopped and I got off a guard charged me £2.60 for my journey.

thanks again Jane.

I am terrible at being proud of myself, I see the flaws first.
However I feel the dog picture was a turning point. Plus the client was extremely happy with the outcome.

he can be found here
https://darrentconnor.deviantart.com/art/Bruce-Finished-617231836

Ted Hughes is an interesting choice.

Xanthe's one of my favourite poets on here, I found Abed's reading of that piece to be extremely moving.
link to anyone that's never heard it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jprPLMcZyu8

I have couple of questions.

Which poem are you most proud of?
What song do you think best describes you?
You're given 2 minutes on global television, to say whatever you please. What do you say?

I will come back with some questions, Darren, but I applaud your taste in music. The Seahorses only album 'Do it Yourself' is criminally underrated and 'Blinded by the Sun' is a brilliant track. Wasn;t the guitarist in The Stone Roses?

Tough questions,

'He tears time like paper' is probably my proudest because it was my first step into something a bit more metaphorical. I am also fond of 'what is love' a poem I dedicated to my wife. I am not normally one for outpouring of emotion so that was a step into the unknown for me.

The song that best describes me depends on my mood.
Radiohead's 'creep' is a good choice, I often felt I was always just outside of inner circles.

Now the tough question
2 mins on global television

It would depend On what I would want to achieve, personal gain or something bigger.
I would go for something bigger,
I would be tempted to discuss the link between killing and wars with religion.
Maybe try and convince everybody that all religions are the same just taught in a different way. Like language, we may speak differently but are saying the same thing. All religions teach peace.
Or I would go the other way and put an argument across that religion is phony and just a cash cow for those in the upper echelons. Though this route might cause a few issues.
Finally I might just tell everyone that an asteroid is twenty minutes away from wiping out the planet......

Yes john squire, probably the best guitarist of his generation.

Darren, I adore you!!!!

What is your biggest fear?

I know your daughter's enjoy sports, do you?

Do you wear socks with sandels?

Darren, you have discerning tastes. You also have an eclectic style which has always reminded me of an Edgar Allen Poe/Salvador Dali merger.

Where were you, how old, circumstances, etc when you first thought of yourself as "a poet?"

Have your earliest influences continued to haunt you?

When you've written something distinctly "you" do you see veins of the ore of a golden youth?

thanks Andrea

my biggest fear revolves around my children, I just hope they stay well and safe.

I enjoy watching sport, football (soccer) mainly, I have followed Chelsea FC since 1986. They were terrible back then. I did play rugby for my town in my youth and was good on the track, especially 100m and 400m sprinting. I broke various records as a kid. I should take part in more sport (or any sport really) but I already feel like a juggler with time so cannot really commit to anything.

I would never wear socks with sandals, I am fussy with shoes. I usually only have one pair. Plus a work pair and a smart pair for weddings/funerals. My one pair I wear to death then buy another pair. (the same if I can) They need to be a shoe/trainer (sneaker) cross. The best pair I ever had had no laces and no back, like a leather clog with no back. Made by sketchers. I could literally stand up and walk forward, putting them on in the same motion.

Thanks Larry high praise indeed,

I haven't yet thought of myself as a poet, I doubt I ever will. I partake (or dabble) in poetry. I did publish 'fallen Angel' despite it's flaws and have sold a few copies through Amazon. I think officially when you can live off poetry you are a poet. I suppose if I put my mind to it I could improve as a poet.
I first dabbled in poetry at junior school, when I was 9 I won a poetry competition, my poem was a bit different to the rest of the entrants. Through my late teens early twenties I wrote and rewrote and rewrote again a novel. It was based on a future with no cash and our world was controlled by hand held computers. To buy, beg or borrow you needed to touch a finger print reader on somebody's hand held computer. I should have finished it as this was written in 1999 and edited right through to 2003. Right before Mobiles became smart phones. Because I never saw the novel as finished or good enough (despite 28 chapters and an offer from a publishing agent) I decided to try a book of poetry. I studied Ted hughes 'the crow' at secondary education level and that is when I first began to appreciate a metaphor. I worked on a book of forms entitled 'seven deadly sins' I wrote 10 different forms for each sin, I managed to get as far as 5 sins before I canned it (a familiar theme here) Some of my novel chapters were published online for review and I received some good constructive feedback, Remembering this I hunted out a website for my poems. I will always remember Randy East giving me my first poetry comment, he was blown away apparently. For that brief moment I felt like a poet.

Have my earliest influences continued to haunt me?

Yes, without doubt. I never switch off. I play scenarios in my head like little scenes from the past where I chose a different outcome. I would never change what I have now, but I think my Brain is just interested. In some of my poems there are underlying messages or hints to how I felt at certain times in my past. Some of my favourite songs or films creep into my poetry.

"When you've written something distinctly "you" do you see veins of the ore of a golden youth?"

This is a great question, I don't think I am brave enough to fully write a distinct 'me' I think my poems are more what I could be if I stray or what I would like to be. I should celebrate and appreciate my work more, whether that is a poem or painting. Every influence, every moment has been discovered, learnt and been put to good use. We level up through our lives like computer game characters. Learning from bad decisions storing feelings, developing abilities we didn't know we had.

(I hope I have answered your questions sufficiently)

Hi Darren...I'm pretty sure by now that you know how much I like your art work...it's pretty amazing mate :)

I think you work from a photograph of your subject?...at least in your mosaic pieces..is this correct? Just wondered if you can dream up something from scratch? You know...I can copy draw a little myself but...don't think I could every come up with something original like the label on a wine bottle for example...I have numerous bottles of wine that I have bought simply because I loved the drawing on the label :) Could you tempt me with one of your originals? not a mosaic?

EDIT

SH*T...that sounded nasty and...I didn't mean it to be...I know you're on line right now...sorry if it sounded offensive mate...

Didn't sound nasty to me, I haven't tried an original rather than from a photo yet. I have too much to learn before I dip my toe into that.
I think the level of imagination required for that would be astronomical, I have merely fastened my belt aboard the rocket.

Phew...glad you didn't take it the wrong way..I'm just really interested . I have been trying to draw a pair of clasped hands...yeah Leonardo/Titanic may have had an influence but..still can't get it right :)

EDIT

Also, I look at all those LP covers (from my generation) that I still have and wonder...were the designers brilliant? or on something that I missed out on haha!!!

I stumbled upon a book online called 'creative illustrations' by Andrew loomis. It's 70 years old but the reviews rate it. It's available on amazon. Apparently it teaches techniques that aren't taught at art school. It's worth a look. I am ordering one myself soon.

Maybe you could try caricatures to get you away from the mosaic scene? They're fun things to do :)

EDIT..

Sorry...I should ask a question I guess...

I remember you said that your wok is the favourite item in you kitchen...what would you cook for me if I came to visit??.

You have a good memory, I have started to fall out of love with my wok. It doesn't sit well on my gas hob. I make a great quiche from scratch including the pastry. So I would probably show off with a slab of quiche.

Hello Sir. I think the combination of poet and painter is already awesome...but wait, you play bass? It's one of the occasions when I question the justice of this world...:-)

I have read Ted Hughes in my childhood and whenever his name comes up I remember some great things about my life by that time. I remember there is another Hughes too. (Langston)

I have read many of your works but I especially love "I Always go on about the Moonlight" and the ending "or so you say" took quite a time replaying in my mind.

What is it about Ted Hughes' poetry that you like/love?

What is your favorite song to play on bass and why?

Thanks. :-)

Thanks for your question and apologies for late reply.

I studied 'The Crow' at college and the deeper meaning really struck a chord with me. He has this way of hiding what he really wants to say under some powerfully expressive poetry. His imagery was fascinating to me. It was his writing that sparked my interest in poetry.

My favourite song to play on Bass is an unusual choice for my age, 'Rain' By the Beatles. If memory serves it was a B side or at least an album track. Like Paul McCartney Bass wasn't my first choice, we just didn't have anybody else willing to give it a go. It was no real surprise that a majority of our songs had intricate bass lines and bass solos in them. I was determined to show that Bass can make a song.
A current song I think works well with this Mantra is Charlie Puth's 'attention'
The bass changes the gears of the song;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfs8NYg7yQM

(New Years day by U2 and walking on the moon by the police were two I would play constantly just to wind my bandmates up)

Many thanks for your answers. It is fascinating to know you can specifically identify one poet that sparked your poetry.

I'll go and check the songs you have mentioned in here. U2 and The Police... I have heard some of their tracks.

Bass can make a song! I have listened to a live bass solo and it's beautiful and mad at the same time. I mean mad in a good way.

Your art is pretty awesome!

Do you have any art work that's connected to one of your poems?

If a movie were to be made about your life, what actor do you think would be best for your part?

Do you have a favorite daughter? LOL

Darren, I am in awe of your accomplishments. Poet, painter, musician! Damn -it man is there anything you don't do? I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your answers to the questions presented to you. Do you find your work was totally different when you were drinking? Congrats btw on your stopping. It takes a lot for a person to recognize there's a problem. What is your favorite medium when you are painting? I always loved watercolors myself. If you could be any animal or bird what would it be and why?

I'm all caught up. I've been monstrously busy and my "to do" list is doubling by the day. Alas, here I am!

Some comments:
I love Radiohead, and Creep is a classic. I wouldn’t ever consider you a creep, Darren, but you are an individual. That is a very good thing in my opinion.
You should consider buying a backup pair of your favorite shoes for when your current ones wear out just in case they stop producing them.
Funny how I consider pretty much everyone on PnQ to be poets, but I feel the same way - that I’m not a poet. When someone says, “Oh, Jane’s a poet,” when the subject arises, I laugh and say something like, “No, no, I’m not a poet, I just write poetry here and there.”
A quiche sounds delicious right now. Yum. I’m coming over! :)

Question #1: What high level job do you think you could lie your way into with no formal experience and no one would notice?
Question #2: What one thing do you really want but can’t afford?

Thanks

apologies again for late replies, I have spent all day trying to put a new bath in. (it's finally in after 8 hours, the old cast iron one was cemented to the wall)

None of my artwork is currently connected to my poems but I am sure 'being a tree' has potential

I have thought long and hard about an actor to play me, It would have to be someone a little geeky, So I am thinking Jason Biggs.

You knew that I could never choose, Both daughters and my Son have equal billing with me. However when my youngest daughter was born, my wife was so busy with the other two that I would go up to the hospital every night to do an evening feed. I seem to have more of a mothers bond with her rather than father. For the first two years of her life she would only let me hold her if she could see me. My sister held her once and she was fine until I came into the room then she went mad holding out her arms for me. She once wrote in her Mums mothers day card 'To Dad and Mum, happy mothers day'

Thanks Brenda

I was braver when drinking, more close to the knuckle and sometimes inappropriate.
I wrote an explicit poem once, I cringe when I think of it and I will not be exploring that avenue again.

I use acrylics because they are fast drying, I have used oils but I am too impatient to wait for them to go off enough to overpaint.
I only use Pebeo acrylics as they usually only need a single brush stroke. Some of the cheaper acrylics need two or three coats, nothing worse than painting a picture three times on the same canvas.

It would have to be a bird of prey such as an eagle, I like the idea of having the freedom of the sky. Plus I would like to remain near the top of the food chain.

Thanks Jane, My to do list is the same.

Question #1: What high level job do you think you could lie your way into with no formal experience and no one would notice?

Probably the head of a retail empire, Just talk a lot about Key Performance Indicators and protecting my bottom line.
Visit shops, kick some arse, have a moan. Move something about, that sort of thing.

Question #2: What one thing do you really want but can’t afford?

I have two things

A dodge challenger and a 1950's blonde fender telecaster guitar.

I dream and talk about both frequently.

I would buy two pairs of shoes but I moan about paying 40-50 quid for a pair, let alone double.

someone once told me that you should have expensive shoes and an expensive mattress on your bed.
Something to do with walking and sleeping luxuriously.
To be fair, I would be just as happy wearing espadrilles and sleeping on straw.

Ooh. Did you have to sledge hammer the tub?
We removed one two weeks ago on the 7th floor of a condo in a very tiny bathroom with no space to swing a hammer.
But we did find old Coke bottles and Dr Pepper can from the 60s, so I thought that was cool.

Super sweet about your youngest!!

Since you mentioned remodeling a bath and all, what other work do you do?

I found a feather duster and a coat hanger.

I didn't smash it somehow I managed to get it into the garden on my own. Not sure what to do with it now. Might use your sledgehammer technique.

The other work I do is tiling. Although I am running a shop at the moment by trade I am a tiler. I have also dabbled in plastering and plumbing. I will try anything apart from electricity before getting a pro in.

Darren, thank you for your reply. I do like working with acrylics too. Slow drying and left handed don't mix well. I agree with your animal/bird choices. Plus you get to fly too, how cool is that!

Darren, if you could interview one person (alive or dead) and had one question, who would it be and what would you ask them?

I have thought about this a lot.

Going back and meeting Elizabeth 1st and asking her if I could be her court wizard doesn't really answer your question. (I would only need to take back with me an old Kodak instant camera to print off an instant portrait, or something as simple as a cigarette lighter)

So my answer is this.

Either Stephen Hawking or Albert Einstein and my question would be;

'If the universe is expanding what is it expanding into?'

That question has plagued me for years - I literally turn myself inside out trying to get my head around the idea. I would like their thoughts on that too, but I'm not sure we'd ever get a satisfactory answer...

'If the universe is expanding what is it expanding into?'

I know here we are suppose to ask and you are to answer, but since you asked I thought I could shed some light towards answering your question.
I guess from this broad question you are expecting a definite answer, but there are no definite answers when one overlaps the scientific questions with philosophy:
The phrase "Expanding into" implies that there is an order in universe. It insinuates that everything is turning to something precontrived, and going somewhere not randomly but to some destination. This, is congruent to the notion of religious destiny, if not, at least a scientific destiny, which by itself implies the existence of God or some prearranged destination.
But if the God is implied why do we need to know where we are going, or to what we are “expanding into” where there is already a navigator, that we can not trust unless we give up and surrender to, wholeheartedly?
And if we do not believe in destiny, so the preposition into is not applicable, or else, the answer would be very easy:
The universe is expanding to something more expanded, though because it hasn’t happened yet we do not know what, we don't know how. Even Einstein couldn’t foresee that, due to the expediential rate of expanding.
Maybe as the German poet Bertolt Brecht would say: "We made the world better and then we shall make the better world even better and we keep on going that way." (my trans)
And so as the universe!!

Great answer Frank. You make a valid argument, we would have to be able to comprehend 4D to truly find the answer. If there is a true answer.

What is your favorite and least favorite season?

What is your favorite word, and why?

If you could choose to visit any time period, what year/era would you visit?

Darren, you are a darling. Love reading all of your answers.

Question #3: Is there a scene in a movie or TV show that can always make you cry? Has a poem or book ever made you cry?
Question #4: What is the most altruistic, selfless thing you have ever done?

Thanks for your questions Britt

Because I live in the U.K. It's hard to pick a season because it seems like we only have one. I am sure when I was a kid the summer holidays were always hot and we had snow every winter. Now it seems to rain all summer and we have some hot days late October. It snows now and again but doesn't seem to snow heavily more often than every 5 years or so. So going back to my childhood I loved the summer and winter, Autumn was always depressing.

Answering these questions I have noticed that I am not very decisive, because I don't have a favourite word, I have many.
I like words that have impact that describe something brilliantly like 'Moron' it sounds horrendous. I tend to like words that 'mock' such as 'Helmet, knucklehead, Neanderthal etc'
Not sure what that says about me.

The time question is easy. Elizabethan era to show Elizabeth 1st a banana or something similar. She had problems with her teeth and wig itching so I could give her Colgate and talcum powder. There would be a portrait up somewhere in the world of me in Elizabeth's court.

I am not outwardly emotional but sometimes watching films I feel like 'this is the point I should be crying'
The end of shawshank redemption is moving as is the ending of Toy Story 3. I tend to be moved and remember emotional points of films. No poem that I can remember has reduced me to tears. Books tend to move me, sometimes affect my thinking for a few days. Roald Dahls autobiographies were particularly moving.

I have pondered this question, I can't think of any huge selfless act I have done. I tend to live my life doing loads of little ones. I am always giving money to homeless people despite being told not to. I give people lifts help people out with DIY etc. I once had an elderly couple in my tile shop that had just purchased tiles to retile their bathroom. They had spent £300 and another £300 having it fitted. They were in tears as the tiler had made a complete mess of it. I went round to look and it was terrible. So I gave them replacements for free and arranged to have it refitted for free as well. I offered the new tiler extra discount on his next few orders to do it for me. He never charged me as he was as disgusted as me with how they had been left. This is one story that stays with me. More because the tiler worked for free. I only had to write some stock off.

Thanks Darren I am glad you liked it.
Haha I use to have 4D s ( in my stage name) they did not help me much. I left them somewhere in closet. If they help I could lend them to you for a night or two :) :)

If poetry ( art in general) is the reflection of who we are to certain extend, do you think by merely improving one's personality decidedly, his/her work would improve significantly or poetry is only about talent and technic? Do one's personal choices in life affect his/her artistry? In technical term, does individual improvements would affect essentialities ( if we agree arts are dealing with essentials) ?