Poet of the Fortnight #24: Mandy Earl (Dec 6 - 20, 2018)

Mandy has been randomly selected as our 24th Poet of the Fortnight (PotF)! Mandy is a 37-year-old female living in the Big Apple! That's New York for our non U.S. members ;) Mandy joined PnQ nearly 4 years ago in January 2015. As per her profile, she started writing at a really young age and found writing to be a good way to feel as if she was telling someone else what was going on inside of her. We're lucky she joined PnQ so that we could also have that glimpse.

Please welcome Mandy to her own special thread, and be sure to read her latest poem posted just below:

----
H2O

You
are a mist
brushing my skin
gentle caress
softly sighing
You
are dew
early morning
clinging to my petals
helping me bloom
You
are a warm rainfall
embracing me lightly
each drop
making me shine
You
are a spring shower
cleansing me
renewing me
washing away
all my fears
You
are a downpour
drenching me
violently claiming me
becoming yours
You
are a flood
like my emotions
engulfing me
consuming me
losing myself in you
You
are the ocean
all I can see
vast and endless
deep and true
You
are water
sustaining me
necessary
Without you
life would cease to exist
----

Mandy, please fill out this public survey when you find time. You can pass any question/prompt in this thread, just write "Pass." I will ask 10 questions total throughout the next 2 weeks, and members of the community are encouraged to participate by asking questions of their own. Here's the survey:

Real name:
Meaning behind your PnQ name:
Birth place:
Languages spoken:
When you discovered PnQ and why you joined:
Favorite poet(s):
Book you are currently reading:
Song you last listened to:
Inspirations for writing:
5 truths about yourself:

Thank you and I'm happy to share some things about myself :)

Real name: Mandy Earl

Meaning behind your PnQ name: This is my real name so no special meaning there. I sometimes use the nickname Anyamaris because I just like the name.

Birth place: Medina NY, which very close to where I live now in Western NY, which means I'm very close to Canada.

Languages spoken: English and I can remember some german phrases from college, but since I don't use it often, I can't claim to speak it.

When you discovered PnQ and why you joined: I've been writing poetry since I can remember and I've had random notebooks I've retained (or lost, sadly) since I've been a little girl. A friend of mine recommended me reading some of her poetry on here, and I decided to join in 2015 as well to share things I've written and continue to write.

Favorite poet(s): William Butler Yeats, D.H. Lawrence, Edgar Allen Poe

Books you are currently reading: Oathbringer by Brandon Sanderson, and a bunch of really cheesy romance short stories

Song you last listened to: Joji-Slow Dancing in the Dark

Inspirations for writing: Experiences with people throughout my life, which is a fairly generic answer, I know! Sometimes my brain goes places and I think of things as objects or ideas, such as the poem featured above and I'll just obsess over that idea. Like water.

5 truths about yourself:
-I watch ALOT of anime
-I collect plushies
-I have 2 cats named Noodle and Loki
-I love cooking and baking
-I work in a specialty cheese shop

Looking forward to any questions if anyone is interested!

Thanks for introducing yourself!

Question #1: Which of these can you do? A cartwheel, a headstand, raise one eyebrow, whistle, touch your tongue to your nose, wiggle your ears, roll your tongue, cross your eyes. Second part: Any other little tricks up your sleeve that you care to mention?

I've actually never been able to do a cartwheel, or headstand. I'm horribly clumsy! I can raise one eyebrow, whistle, roll my tongue and cross my eyes. I wish I could wiggle my ears though!

As for little tricks up my sleeve...I suppose it depends on what you call tricks. I can change my own oil in my car.... I was actually a chimney sweep and dryer exhaust technician years ago, so I can clean a chimney and repair masonry work, and I've even built the foundation of a house and built a 6 ft chimney around myself at a convention. I also knit and crochet, so I can make blankets and scarves and things. I've learned some gardening from my mother. I suppose I like to learn anything I can so I can do it myself and not rely on others where I can!

Thank you for the questions!

You sound like you a quite skilled at a number of things

1) where do you see yourself in ten years
2) what would you tell your 18 year old self if you could

Hello-yes I have picked up some random things over the years lol.

Hmm for the first question...I hope to have a degree of any sort in 10 years and be working in a career I enjoy. I'm currently trying to figure out what the heck I want to do but once I settle on it, I'd just like to be doing what I enjoy. And maybe having 5 more cats....

If I could go back and tell my 18 year old self anything, I'd tell me to stop worrying about what others think about me and to focus on myself. I spent way too many years catering to people who aren't even in my life anymore at the expense of my own time and money. So I'd tell me to take care of me. I'd also tell me to stop and really think about what I'm doing rather than rushing into things.

Hi, Mandy! *waves*

I found such wisdom in your answers and I love tbat idea of teaching ourselves to be self-sufficient and independent. Granted, there's nothing wrong with needing to rely on others but it would be awesome to take care of a majority of things on my own. Also, important side note: your cats sound adorable!

You mentioned anime. Do you have a favorite anime to watch? Do you enjoy Japanese films? I remember watching Bleach back in high school. Then, my brother got me into some Miyazaki films like "My Neighbor Totoro" and "Spirited Away".

Do you have a desire to travel and explore somewhere in the States or outside and if so, where would you go?

Hello!

Thank you, I agree completely! I definitely think it's important to rely on others at times, but I definitely went a little too far overboard and forgot to take care of me. I think it's really all about balance.

Thank you! They are both definitely characters. My older one is Noodle, she is a calico and she is queen of the castle. She enjoys chasing lights on the wall. The younger is an orange boy tabby named Loki, appropriately because he is cute but mischievous. He likes sleeping in the sink and standing like a Meerkat for attention.

I have quite a few anime I love depending on my mood, i've watched several many times over. I'm absolutely in love with Attack on Titan, I have no idea why I love it so much but I'll go back and rewatch it repeatedly. Hunter x Hunter is another of my favorites, that one is very lengthy though, I think around 160 or so episodes. My favorite anime movie is called Koe no Katachi. I actually have never watched a Studio Ghibli film but I know they are pretty amazing! I have watched some japanese dramas, as well as korean and chinese. A friend of mine got me into anime only about 6 years ago so I've been binge watching everything I can devour :)

I would absolutely love to travel outside the states, as I never have before. I live pretty close to canada and I've never even ventured over the border here! I'd love to travel to Japan, I love japanese food and I'd love to take a train and just travel the entirety of the Japan. I'd also like to visit Alaska, though I suppose that's not really outside the US. I think I'd pretty much go anywhere though, if I had someone else who had an interest in something.

Thank you for the questions! I'm trying to limit what I'm typing cause I'm a blabbermouth who could talk forever if you get me going!

Mandy,

I love anime! My son & I have been buzzing on Castlevania but I like the cheesy ones too.

My wife & I are cat people with two now. One of ours does like Loki - sleeps in the sink.

What are your all time favorite songs MORE THAN a couple years old.

Dear Mandy how wonderful is getting to know you.
Are you familiar with any other poetry except English? I don't mean necessary in their own tongue. Like I am a big fan of French poetry without being able to speak the language.
What is the purpose of poetry in General (if you have given a thought) and in your life?
Do you think creating art, in our case writing poetry, is pretentious? I mean in its nature, regardless of the individual tendencies.
By the way if anything I say do not make sense to you just do not answer, I do not get upset. Only trying to get to know you.
How do you over come cliches in your works ( I ask because I felt convincing traces of originality in your piece above)

Hello! Yes, I didn't think I'd like anime, but when a friend asked me to watch some with him, I was hooked. Castlevania was fun! I like alot of the Netflix things.

I've seen alot of pictures online of cats in sinks, so I'm happy to know he's not the only one out there!

Hmm...all time favorite songs. I absolutely LOVE Peter Gabriel's In Your Eyes. Beth Hart's L.A. Song was pretty powerful for me during some hard times. I pretty much love all Joni Mitchell...

And Nirvana...anything Nirvana. I hope that wasn't too vague!

Hello, it's wonderful to be able to socialize with all of you too!

I'm not very familiar with any poetry outside of English, sadly. I should expand my horizons and look into some others. When I was in my German class in college, my professor used to tell us stories and read some German stuff, but I can't remember it now.

The purpose of poetry for me and in my life is for my own personal well being and therapy. I sometimes feel like I have this well of emotion and when it gets full, it's almost crippling. So I started writing down my thoughts and feelings, and eventually it just started forming into poetry. I feel like it's a cleanse almost, if that makes sense. It also comes with the added bonus of feeling proud or positive for having created something personal and being able to share it and connect to others.

I personally don't think creating art/poetry is pretentious in it's very nature. I think the only thing that can make it pretentious is the intention behind the individual creating it, after the fact. I hope that answers what you were asking, let me know if I misunderstood!

I don't mind clarifying at all if I don't understand, I'm happy to answer anything, so I want to make sure I'm answering what you'd like correctly.

With the cliches, I honestly just write a lot, and some things do come out sounding very cliche and I'm unhappy with them. Then I will just get this spark, or my mind will drift somewhere strange and I'll come up with something I'm happy with. So I can't say I avoid them completely, I just don't put them on here if I'm not happy about them.

Let me know if I missed anything and it was great getting to answer some questions, thank you!

Such great answers.
by being pretentious in nature I meant because they are created for others to see and enjoy. They hardly could ever be kept to oneself.
But I think you answered it well.
Now that you are sport here are some more.

Do you write your poetry or your poetry writes itself? (I know you almost answer this one)
In your opinion what differs POETRY from PROSE, is it something in the FORM or is it in the CONTENT??

~~From Wikipedia: In art and art criticism, FORM and CONTENT are considered distinct aspects of a work of art. The term FORM refers to the work's style, techniques and media used, and how the elements of design are implemented. CONTENT, on the other hand, refers to a work's essence, or what is being depicted.~~

Sorry again if my question are boring.

Most of the time, I think my poetry writes itself. Some things I've written I've formulated myself in my head over time, but majority will seem to just pop out of nowhere. I think that's why I go through a lot of dry spells from writing, because I have gotten used to not forcing anything from myself and just letting it come out naturally. It can be frustrating though, because I do love writing but when I'm not feeling it, I just can't do it!

Between poetry and prose, I believe that it's definitely form. I think I mostly write in prose, because I don't try to put it into any form, but sometimes it just comes out that way because of the way it flows. It's almost accidental poetry. I think the same content can exist in both, but I definitely think it's the form that differentiates it from prose to poetry. I hope this answers that fully!

And they are definitely not boring, I'd never considered some of these things so it's nice to have them asked and to really think about them. I honestly have to look up some things with regards to poetry on here a lot because I am not well learned on what the forms are called, or structures of things. I have always just *written* whatever is in my head, so I enjoy looking into and finding out what things are actually called and that words exist to define them!

Again great answers. Presented gracefully.
Yes I like somehow more challenging questions in order to have a real conversation.
It is right, form is the key in separating prose from poetry. You can turn any poetical expression to an explanation , then even though the content is the sam but poetry is gone. Though the form has already develop a lot to these days and poetry has become more pure and less involved with sophistication, to express deeper and more free.
Also the description of content is a little controversial nowadays as well.

Dear Mandy I have lots of things to ask but retreat for the time being, to allow others to get to know the wonderful you, in their own ways, as I did. I might come back again for more questions. See how it goes.

In response to your answers to my questions: I think responsible car owners should know how to check their own oil and change a tire. I would even add that car owners should be able to change their own oil if they're physically able. With Youtube, it's easy to figure out. On that note, I have a question.

Question #2: Do you think there are things all capable and responsible adults should know how to do?

And my favorite question to ask, which is unrelated...

Question #3: What do you believe in?

I definitely agree that everyone who owns a car who is physically capable should be able to do that, I probably shouldn't have said it was a skill.
Question 2-
I believe there are definitely things all capable and responsible adults should know how to do, yes. I've always thought being able to take care of yourself with the basics is very important, at least to me. I think when it comes down to it, outside of the things we all expect of an adult such as reading and writing, I think all capable adults should be able to drive (have license), basic cooking skills, know how to do their own laundry, if you own a car, know basic maintenance. I feel like if you know how to do something without calling someone else to help, that makes you that much more independent and in a situation where you can't get anyone to help you, there's no problem. I'm certain there's more on this list but that's what I've got right now :D

Question 3-
I feel like this is a harder question, depending on what you're asking. If you're asking in general terms, that's a pretty broad answer, but I feel like this is more a religion question? I'll answer it with that idea. I wasn't raised with any strong religious background, but I think if I were to classify myself, I'd be agnostic. I believe...or I want to believe there is something out there that is a higher power, but I have no idea what *it* is. It could just be the power of nature, it could be a deity, another species of being, so on. When it comes to morals and things, I truly believe that I just want to be a good person, who smiles at others and thinks the best. I don't follow any rules or doctrines, but I want to just not bring harm to others to the best of my ability. I suppose my answers here are fairly boring and/or generic/vague, but that's all I can think of at the moment!

Hopefully I answered what you were asking, let me know if i misunderstood!

Not at all generic, boring, or vague. I'm thoroughly enjoying reading all of your answers. There was no wrong way to answer my question about what you believe in - I wanted to leave it open to your interpretation. I'm Agnostic as well :)

Now that everybody is busy with Christmas stuffs let me bring my head out of my cratch and ask an unusual question which I ask people I surmise having clairvoyant tendencies:
Have you ever heard THE music?

Hmm, I think it depends what you mean by THE music...I have a feeling I sort of know what you mean but maybe I've experienced it in a different way? or maybe the answer is no, if I'm not really understanding at all!

I am not sure, maybe I indulge too much, or maybe I am looking for someone like me ( being the only one is not fun, believe me.) or maybe I am sharing that to let everyone know: There is something, a spiritual reward of some sort, at the end of this rocky road of exposing your feeling as an artist, poet to the elements.
Genuine feelings, no matter how unpopular and abandoned, are valued and seen, the universe is sentient and utterly conscious. The eyes of truth ( as in Enigma’s song) is always watching us. And believe me that the moment we hear the music we know, there would be no doubt. It is a song from within but it is so vivid and clear, where you are sure there are no outer source. Though no matter how profound, it doesn't change anything in your life. The affect diminishes gradually like a extended rise of a spiritual orgasm, ( sorry I couldn’t describe it any better) But, the after taste stays in you. You go on with your daily life and mundane concerns. your wicknesszes do not fly away, and struggles do not get easier, except you now know there is something more to life than this.
The good thing is when you hear it, you remember you always have heard it; only it was buried in somewhere out of your attention, or you could call it subconscious. So your answer: " I have a feeling I sort of know what you mean but maybe I've experienced it in a different way?" is not too far from the truth

I hope it happen to you

I actually have experienced this, though I wouldn't call it a song for myself. I believe maybe it's interpreted differently for everyone? But I know I've had those moments, and it clicked when you say it doesn't change anything, except it does change *you* in a way, deep down. Interesting to think about, thank you for asking!

Could 'hearing the music' explain moments of sheer, fleeting, unadulterated bliss and/or contentedness where senses come alive and seem to align, striking at surprising times - where in an instant everything can feel right with the world? I haven't had one of those in a while, but I'll never forget the first time I felt it. If that's not what you're talking about, I wonder what I'm talking about?

Back to you, Mandy :)

Question #4: What fictional place would you most like to visit? In this fictional place, who would you be?
Question #5: What is the biggest adventure you've been on? How do you envision your next big adventure?
Question #6: If I were to ask someone close to you: "Who is Mandy? What type of person is she?" What might they tell me?

#4-Well, this is an interesting question. When I was growing up, I read a lot and the two places that stick out in my mind that I wanted to visit and be someone in were Narnia and Middle Earth from Lord of the Rings. I think I'd just like to be myself for both places, except in Middle Earth, I'd like to be an elf version of me! There are many other books I've read where I've loved the fictional world, but likely wouldn't want to visit or live in it, such as Mistborn or The Stormlight series by Brandon Sanderson-mostly because of how dangerous the worlds are.

#5- I'd have to say my biggest adventure was when I was younger, a friend and I decided we wanted to go to a concert, and I was very into certain bands. We ended up meeting one of those bands and then they basically invited us to come to the next show and the next, we got on backstage list, and befriended them. In the months and years following, we proceeded to meet many other bands and befriend some people, so we would always go on these little mini adventures that would take us away from our everyday lives every so often. We'd drive up to 10 hours away and go in little tour sprees, shop for them and just hang out and party. I can't say I'd want to do that again because it's very tiring and also not very responsible! But it was definitely an adventure! As for my next big adventure...I'd really like to go to Japan and tour the whole country from top to bottom and explore the land and try the food and really enjoy the culture.

#6- Well, if you asked someone close to me, I imagine they would describe me as someone who likes to talk A LOT, LOVES cats, anime, reading and cooking/baking, and is very determined when she gets her teeth into something. I think the words bossy, clever, smart and flighty could also be included.
I've been told that some of these things aren't always a positive but that is what I imagine they would say!

Hi Mandy.. Its been lovely getting to know more about you. I'm sorry Ive left it a little late but if theres time I have 4 questions for you as follows..
1. What is your greatest regret so far?
2. What is the one thing that annoys you the most?
3. What one thing brings you the most happiness?
4. If you could have one wish come true what would it be?
Best wishes Milly x

Mandy, it's truly been a delight reading your answers, thoughts, especially about Middle Earth and Narnia (I could never decide which lol).
If you were an elf or mythical/fantasy creature, what would you love your name to be? I used to love creating new names for myself, imagining I'm in different lands and universes.

Mandy, I love your answers. I've never read any of the Chronicles of Narnia. Do you think they hold up for adults? Maybe I should check them out. I, too, read a lot while growing up and also had an affection for fantasy fiction :) Also, I can totally imagine an elf version of you.

Your answer to number 5 - holy crap, my eyes got huge while reading your adventures while traveling with bands. That's wild! Sounds like an unforgettable experience. How old were you? I had wild adventures too when I was younger, and now I'm such a sissy :( haha.

"LOVES cats." I can get on board with that ;)

Question #7: What are some of your bucket list items?
Question #8: Regarding yourself, what do you think are two areas for improvement?
Question #9: What do you think your spirit animal or patronus (if you like Harry Potter) would be, and why?
Question #10: When do you feel most relaxed and at peace with the world?

Hello!

1. My greatest regret so far was taking a nose dive in my first semester at a major university and letting the failure overshadow so many things I've done with my life since. I wish I'd accepted that sometimes I'm going to fail, then maybe I can not let it control me so much.

2. The one thing that annoys me the most is when people are bothered by something that myself or someone else is doing, and instead of just talking to the person and explaining themselves, or trying to remedy the situation, they turn it into a bigger problem by telling everyone else and getting this possibly easy thing to fix turned into a large group drama. Whether intentional or unintentional, it normally does make things so much worse. (I've been on both sides of this)

3. These days, my happiness comes from little things. Taking my shoes off after a hard day at work, a random compliment from a stranger (or a friend!), my cats running to me when I come home, that bite of that food that I've been craving for days. I think in the past, I thought happiness was something attainable that you ended up wearing, like it would just stay there. But for me, it really is just little bursts of joy over small things. I'm sorry if I can't just give you one thing!

4. You know, I typed out that I wanted my one wish to be going back and redoing my life with all the "wisdom" I have now...but in reality, I imagine I'd just make a new category of mistakes I'd want to change later. This is a really hard question! I imagine it would change daily based on when you asked me...but I think I'd be completely selfish here and wish I could wake up everyday with motivation and positive attitude to get the things I want to do completed. Going to the gym to improve myself, smiling even when things get rough, etc. I know not everything is going to be perfect, but I'd like to have a stronger, more positive and motivated drive inside me to help me. I had spinal fusion surgery a year and a half ago so I could use that right now!

Thank you for your questions!

Anya Amaris.

I actually use that name in many of the games I've played. I don't know where it came from but I really like how it sounds! I've also used Akttaes alot, but it's a bit more harsh and isn't very "elvish". What about yours? I'm curious now!

I definitely think they hold up for adults, but that said, I think when we read something as a child, the power and thrill of it stays so I might be completely biased! You can watch the movies too, but I think the books are better always.
And that made my day that you can picture an elf version of me!

As for my concert days, I don't talk about them very often but it was fun to relay the experience to you! We started when I was 20, and I was working at Hot Topic at the time, and my friend was my manager, so we got to figure our work shifts out easily to accomodate all that, lol. Yeah I'm a total sissy now. All that stuff is so tiring. But I met some wonderful people (and some horrid ones too!) but I don't like going to concerts anymore!

(I even have a cat purse and cat sweater tights...I'm a bit excessive)

#7 Hmm bucket list...I want to visit Japan and Alaska. I want to eat Japanese food IN Japan. I'd also like to learn Japanese. I want to get married and be pretty in a wedding dress (as silly as that sounds). I think alot of my list would be travelling, to be honest! But those are my top few. I'll add more to this if I think of some in a reply, because I know Ill have some pop in my head later today!

#8 One area would be my physical health. I had spinal fusion surgery a year and a half ago, and I gained some weight from it. I'd like to be able to work on my physical well being so I can be more active like I used to be. The second area, I've been fairly anxious and more hermit like as I've gotten older. I'm actually actively working on these things with a therapist over the last few years, but it's a long process and isn't always linear! But I'd like to be able to not get so overwhelmed about small things like just going to the store, and I'd like to not let my emotions control me as much.

#9 I've always believed my spirit animal was a cat, I tend to have very cat like personality quirks and I'm very 'in between' like a cat. Yes, I want pets, but no. stop, I only wanted 3. Yes, I want to cuddle, but only when I want to. That kind of thing, lol. I can also be skittish but very social.

#10 I feel most relaxed and at peace when I'm cuddled up in my favorite blanket in a big overstuffed chair or in bed, curled up with a warm kitty and reading a huge book that I know I'll be working on for a long time.

Thank you for all your questions!

I love how smooth that sounds!

I've always loved anything with -ella or -anna. Isabelle or Ariana. I would make up names like Aliana or anything I could think of. Currently I adore Aurora though (she's also a beautiful singer) and use that as part of a screen name on other social media.

Oh I love those names! Yes, I love the names that sound smooth and nice and flowing. Normally with lots of vowels. I did have a character in a game named Faalon that I loved, but I mostly stick to the Anya Amaris, or Anyamaris for most things.