Diaper Rash - Contest

Because y’all being itching to write and y’all have a lot of (pardon my word usage) poop to say to the world, let us all wipe this thread with a contest. Let your entries be the ointment that heals our daily rashes (for those who have them).

Please, pm me your entries. And don’t forget, be stinky creative.

Deadline : August 9, 2019
I will post the entries for voting on August 10. Results will be given on August 17.

Count me in :)

Luce, you crack me up! Seriously, I was snorting at this and of course, I'm in :P

This had me chuckling too. The opportunities are endless :)

Lol ladies, I’m glad.

I have one entry in! Keep them coming.

Edit: just for the sake of humor, I’m sharing this joke I found online

*****************
After 3 years, the wife starts to think...

...that their child looks different, so she decides to do a DNA test.

She finds out that the child is actually from completely different parents.

Wife: Honey, I have something very serious to tell you

Husband: What’s up?

Wife: According to DNA test results, this is not our child.

Husband: Well don’t you remember? When we were leaving the hospital, we noticed that our baby had a wet diaper and you said, “Honey, go change the baby, I’ll wait for you here.”

*******

^ I hope the above is just a joke.

I saw this other one on fb the other day, it made sense.

“
Why are baby’s diapers called loves, huggies, and pampers, while adult diapers are called depends?

Well that’s because when we’re babies our family will still pamper, love, and give us huggies after changing our diaper, but when we’re adults it depends on who’s in the will.”

Speaking of poo

https://youtu.be/pnIk0npINiE

Omg Scrubs!

I don’t think I ever finished watching that show. Thank you for reminding me of its existence.

Also, lol yeah, everything comes back to poo...

And speaking of which, Lately, i’ve been stumbling upon articles that claim that perhaps gut bacteria have a lot to do with depression and our moods, but those articles don’t exactly explain how :/ so I haven’t taken them seriously. However, the song in the video just reminded me of them. Lol

Now you've broached the subject of diaper rash I keep seeing diaper humour everywhere. I cant thank you enough for hosting this unique and quirky competition. because everytime I see the contest title it brings a huge smile to my face. :)

You’re welcome Milly

By the way, each participant can submit up to two poems!

NASA apparently hosted a competition in 2017 called the Space Poop Challenge to find a solution on how to collect and route human waste away from the body whist wearing a spacesuit in microgravity for up to six days. Which in basic terms meant that they were looking for someone to invent an adult diaper which would work for six to seven days at a time for their Astronauts. So there is clearly money to be made from poop.

The winners of the Space Poop challenge received $30,000 split between three companies

Thatcher Cardon for the MACES Perineal Access & Toileting System (M-PATS)
Team Space Poop Unification of Doctors (SPUDs) for the Air-powered Spacesuit Waste Disposal System
Hugo Shelley for the SWIMSuit - Zero Gravity Underwear for 6 Day Use

So it seems that thanks to physics, mathematics , the theory of poop and these fine innovative companies there are are now adult diapers that can keep an astronaut up in space for upto to seven days. How great would it be if they could transfer that technology for use with to babies and adults who also have diaper needs.
Imagine only having to change a diaper once a week instead of three or four times a day :)

MUCH better than the human centipede movie

^I’m reluctant to watch that movie.. the title human centipede sounds horrific. Is it horrible ?

Milly, wow

I didn’t know that but it’s really interesting.

Here is another joke I found:

“I can think of two good reasons to wear diapers

Number one and number two.”

Larry I had never heard of the human centipede movie. Had to go on line to find out what it was about.. What a horrible concept. It makes you wonder what prompts that kind of idea in a writer (apart from having some weird poop fixation of course) Milly x

By the way, you don’t have to write your poems with the words Poop, rash, or diapers, unless you want to. You can either write poems with humor or be as serious as possible.

Just to give you some info and see if this inspires anyone, the title of this contest was inspired by my daughter and the discussions that were taking place in the main forums.

When I posted the thread, my daughter was having a really bad diaper rash for about a month or less. I did everything I could to get rid of it but applying ointments made it worse. Turns out, I had changed her formula. I am almost positive, the new formula was the culprit. She is fine now.
Also, the discussions that we were having inspired me to say the words I typed:

Because y’all being itching to write and y’all have a lot of ... to say... etc etc. Let your entries be the ointment that heals our daily rashes (if you have them). (I wrote something like that)

So translation, because y’all have been wanting to write and have so many things stuck in your gut (chest idk..), let it out. You can write something cathartic. It’s your choice. Just be creative.

Anyone who has deal with diaper rashes can write about it. Mothers/fathers can tell us their experiences. Anyone who would like to create awareness of the importance of doing number one and number two, can do it. You can be a serious as possible. As literal as posible. Or you can use it as metaphors, and talk about other topics. It’s your choice.

Your prompt is vast.

I have one entry so far. There’s still time.

I have three entries so far. Keep them coming.

Actually, four entries!

Count me in