ARE YOU A FEM-I? OR ANT-I?

I must say I disagree with you. Basically, you are stating that a woman must take care of the petty tasks. Quot:: a man is RESPONSIBLE for... maintaining the more difficult housework::Unquot. What I disagree with is that taking care of a house AND children is no easy task. Motherhood is one of the hardest tasks ever. Keeping the house clean while keeping your kids happy and safe is the hardest job on this planet. I, personally, respect GREATLY women that can work a second job besides motherhood. My mother is a working woman, and frankly, our household is a little chaotic, yes. But how boring to be the old sitcom family where the mommy cooks and cleans while the daddy works a grueling day to come home and be served. Yes, the woman should serve the man. That's what marriage is. However, men also should serve their woman. I would just love to have one day where the hubby switches with the wife. See how he handles a couple of youngins and a moody teenager.
And, by the way, my dad cooks. And he rocks out loud. I love his food, and he enjoys making it.

Car

**And one more thing... is taking out the garbage really a man's job? I must bring this up to my father... I shouldn't be allowed such grueling tasks. Maybe he should do it, all of it. I might break a nail, tear.**

I don't think women should be obligated. Yes, most people view that as the way it should be, but so many people see women as the old black and white TV shows. Women can balance both independence and duty to themselves. And I say, more power to them.
Car

Men and women are naturally designed to do certain things better than others.

Women are naturally (chemically and hormonally) set up to nurture, love, bear children, and be more emotional, while men are naturally (chemically and hormonally) geared towards harder physical labor, providing (food, for instance), protecting, and "leading."

We can never really CHANGE those roles totally, because that is the way nature was designed.

However, it is important to take into account that the way we live our lives from day to day is NOT natural. You would not find work places in "nature," you would not find grocery stores in "nature," etc. so saying that women’s and men's roles are classically defined for the man to work and the female to keep house is absurd. For instance, a man is supposed to provide food, so they should do the grocery shopping- it's only natural. That is, if you are going by "natures" standards.

Mentally, men and women have only a few differences. Men are more scientifically geared and women are more artistically geared, but both these gender traits are overshadowed by personal interest and intellectual ability, so the sex that you are becomes indifferent. Therefore women and men can both do the same work mentally as each other, although the job may be better for one person than another (not necessarily a man vs. a woman).

I think it comes down to society, not nature. Society has made it so that it is a stigma for women to work and not keep house, while sky-high single parenthood and feministic rebellion has proven that this should not be the case.

The way we live our lives today, nature is almost irrelevant unless we are talking about the hormones that are coursing through our blood, it is more about societal stigma than anything else.

It SHOULD be about common sense. Who can make more money? Who WANTS to stay home and raise the children? Who is better cut out for what job? Who is a better cook? Who gets bleach stains and iron burns on the laundry more often? Who is cleaner? Who is a more nurturing and balanced parent? Etc.

These are much more relevant to the way we live today than the "natural" roles of men and women, especially because personality affects much more of who we are than just estrogen and testosterone, not to mention that every individual has varying amounts of the chemicals that give them certain personality traits.

Whilst I am somewhat of a traditionalist, preferring to have my man provide and protect while I would raise our children and keep up with our "nest," I say, to each their own. It is not always the best decision. It is one that needs to be personally made.

But feminists drive me crazy with their hypocritical rantings.

Men can help out. That's all I'm saying. A women doesn't have to keep house alone, and shouldn't have to.

I agree with Kaitlin. I don't think there are many "obligations" that are restricted to either sex today. I think what is most important is that someone gets the job done. If the wife is better educated and has more business prospects, then maybe she should earn the money for the household, and maybe the man should stick around at home.

I feel the biggest "threat" is not women moving out of their obligatory status as a housewife, but rather the vacuum created when she leaves that occupation. Someone should fill it! I think there are some problems with women working, but they aren't just because women are working, its because the man is working at the same time, and no one is home to give their children some personal attention. No matter what you want to call 'home values,' they've been in a general decline over the past 50 years. I think a big contributor is not only feminism and the wish to get out of the house, but rampant masculinity and the unwillingness to be a house-husband.

lol, shutup Mona hahha.

It is an individual issue, but the stigma about what a woman's role and a man's role should be is a societal stigma.

It comes down to equality but then women and men will never be equal because women will invariably use their gender to defend something they cannot do.

That stigma obviously exists, look at the comments of the one who started this post.

I think that women are equal to men and that their job should not be in the home, It would be a lot better if bringing up children and keeping a home was given the right amount of respect. It is a very difficult job and is often pushed away as now women are quite often expected work and look after the children, clean the house etc.

katie! x

Katie, I think you'll find that there is plenty of respect given to homemakers of both sexes.

"But a women's responsibility is primarily to maintain a household."

I'm most likely going to become more involved with this when I have more time...but I had to bring attention to just how incredibly stupid that comment was.

Yes mona, that was true maybe fifty years ago, but society is evolving, maybe you should too.

(Enjoy the peace before the Feminists rush in)

;)

Pink, that comment has as much relevance now as it did 50 years ago.

There is a phrase that goes with it now, though.

It reads exactly the same except for the following change. Where it reads women, replace with men.

Feminism takes no responsability for equality, bear that in mind.

Amen.

Bob: I completly agree, society has not changed for the better at all, except for women.

I am not at all happy with what our society has been whittled down to, despite women's rights. You might be ok with "the good ol' days" being a man, but to be a woman during those times when we weren't 'allowed' to vote let alone do anything involving the law without husband's/father's permission, is worse in the degration and restriction of freedom for women than what society has turned out to be.

Woa, woa, woa

Apologies Bob, I think you interpreted that the wrong way.

I meant to agree with your statement, (and racism HAS gotten better as far as the public eye goes, but i am aware it is all too existent beneath the media)
My point was merely that I stated the world is evolving because we all know that women were treated as a second, lesser being years ago. (not even too much long ago if we pointed out all the political views and restrictions.)
I merely meant to say that obviosly, you being a man (no matter how respectful or intelligent) wouldn't really understand the importance of those new rights and freedoms that women have today to someone like me.

And forgive me but I didn't mean to direct anything toward racism, i didn't even know that was part of the convo.

I wonder what feminism makes of me when I won't let my wife near the Iron...

Am I an upholder of equality because I do the majority of the housework in my castle or am I an oppressor of the uterus because I refuse to let my wife do certain things in the house?

That's a man, right there.

...Depends why you won't 'let' her Bret...

lol just joking, I know what you mean.

No, my statement about the women having the responsibility of being confined to the house was an angry one because:
Women are capable of a hell of alot more. Years ago ladies were being accepted into Yale but turned down the oppertunities in order to become housewives. Not necessarily because they wanted to, but because it was what they had been TAUGHT to want.

I have no problem with whatever gender does the housework in the family. you are not automatically the dominated in the relationship if you do the house work. My statement was made because women should not be obligated or thought to have a responsibility there, it should be a mutual need and task for whichever gender to take.

"i.e lawn care, shoveling, taking out the garbage."

As an aside I'd love it my most difficult chores were putting out the garbage and mowing the lawn. The most difficult chore and husband or partner has is that of keeping his woman happy.

It's not called a labour of love for nothing.

Foxyblondefemme:

That's a man right there.

Am I an oppressor or upholder? Your statement is very vague. I know I am a man, but in your eyes that could be a bad thing!

Sorry for being so vague! I think you are the perfect blend, really. You do some of the housework, and your wife does some too. Keeping the house in order is not just one gender's job. It's not a bad thing, no. I think it is absolutely great that you are able to realize that the hardest chore is the joint effort a man and woman must have. You are neither opressor or upholder... you are simply a partner. I'm glad to see someone that is willing to make a household a team effort with their wife. That's how it should be... every couple should respect one another enough to share the burden. I think you are doing a great thing here.

::Applauds::

Car

"You are neither opressor or upholder... you are simply a partner."

-Wisest insight given on this thread.

I don't think Men and Women should argue over equality and the chemical/hormonal balances that allow sexes to do different things better than others. I just think people should respect that people have the choice to do which ever they prefer.

-Laura.

Thanks!
Car