Omg, my mom found out

Ok my mom found out my suicidal poems. my friends turned me into the school councelor who told me I needed to tell her. I did, and thing went good, I told her I didnt cut and never have, and never was going to (well the first one was true second ones not so true) a week later, I had to much grief to handle I grabbed out my razor blade and slashed the shit out of my arms. now my friends are always worried about me, some wont act the same around me, and my mom shes always freaking out when I get into my moods, and shes forced me a couple times when I burst into tears to take out my cell phone and call a suicidal hotline. well now more then ever i have found ways of getting back into my suicidal writings, and Im really afraid Im gonna start cutting, i have a website with people who are just liek me and talk about cutting all the time! but Im afraid of cutting again. I dont want to cut but its addicting, and now all i can do is look at my scars and damn i did a good job, wish i could do it again. what should i do for help?

oh, honey, i feel ur pain. but please hang in there! i hurt myself everyday, and since youve doneit before, you know that even though it helps you at the time, in then end it only make u feel worse about ur self. if u need to talk im here. u can e-mail me if ud like

bethers_is_my_baby@yahoo.com

but please, try to hang in there, dont hurt urself!

Im trying not to ive been clean for a month now and Im slipping into my old ways again with writing about it, is it ok to still write about it, because thats how i started off in the first place.

well, if writing helps you get your feelings out, then u should write. but if its only gonna make you wanna cut more, than i honestly dont know what to tell you. :(

Hey talk to me I know about this here's my email armyfantic4u@yahoo.com. I try to help the best I can. I'll be here to listen to you.I know how it is. So when you get time just email me ,and we'll talk.

hey kiddo,
hang in there...I'm just like you....my mom found my suicidal letter...i didn't go through with it because i came to realize "when ur so close to lossing your life , only then you'll see how much u want to live".....It's okay hun....take care and if u need some one to talk to my computer is always open...take care chica....:)...best wishes...
*LinkinparkLover*

Honey, I understand. I cut myself a lot. I've done it since I was 7. I'm an abuse victim, I've been abused by almost 20 different people for 13 years (I'm 17 now). I understand the whole thing about cutting and how it makes you feel better.
See, I use my writing to try and get things out without having to actually hurt myself. If that doesn't help, I have a few very close friends that I call. I talk to one of them...once my friend Matt was up until 4 in the morning talking to me so I wouldn't cut myself.
If you need someone to talk to, e-mail me.
NearlyCosmicElf1@aol.com
Just write "cutting" or something like that in the subject so I don't delete it, cause I normally delete letters if I don't know who it's from. I'm online almost everyday, so I'm pretty much guaranteed to see it. Write me if you need help sweety. People care, and there are people that will help you. I'm talking to a therapist right now...you should think about it too...it helps.

well try not to cut urself for a lil while that will just get u screwed over... try a new coping skill just for a little while... i no that sounds impossible but hey its worth a try?

i used to cut until i found poetry and music....they soothe me and makes my agression , depression , and hatred go away..yeah it's still there and sometimes i just feel like picking up my blade and slashing the hell out of my body but i refuse it because of the sadness it caused me and my family...

Im doing better now, except I cant get away from the feeling i have the need for comfort, that i thought i only had in a blade, I feel like shit, i havent done it since, and i thought that after I gave away my blade my temptation would go away, but its not

then don't get caught? duh. cut ur stomach if ur afraid of being caught. Sch, rookies.

im not a damn roockie ive been doing it for 4 years i wanted help, but i dont want to start cutting again because ill lose my b/f that ive wanted back so long, how do i get away from the cutting

im not a damn roockie ive been doing it for 4 years i wanted help, but i dont want to start cutting again because ill lose my b/f that ive wanted back so long, how do i get away from the cutting

yeah i know how that feels

I dont know anymore, i think he wants to break up cuz he was acting kinda funny. anyhow i dont know ive been wanting to cut lately and my nightmares dont make it anybetter

im at the edge its not that i have problems its hes tried so hard to get me to stop, and i dont want to tell him but i know i have too sometime

yeah that makes sense, i guess im just afraid ill lose him again, this time he wont come back

i hope he comes back

i know eaxctly wat u mean. my mum found out too... i agree wit everyone here..email me if u ever need
x x x
take care

"Omg, my mom found out"

Good. That's not a bad thing. You can get help now without keeping it from your mum. Your friends turned you in? Wow my friends would never do that to me!

I know how you feel, lately I have been wanting to cut. I never have before, but oh...i cant help but want to...To just escape all of this, even for only a short time...ahhh. But i wont let myself. I was so close to it on wednesday. I was babysitting my cousins kids, they were asleap and I just couldnt take all this pain anymore. I had been dwelling on it all day. So, I gave in. I walke dinto the kitchen and pulled out the knife, but then, like a distraction from God, the phone rang. I had to go into work that night. I finally got off the phone and the kids were up, then i had to rush home put on my uniform and go straight to work. W e had a huge rush and I was slammed. The whole time I was working I had no time to think about it at all. And when I got home that night I realised what could have happened. My little cousins could have seen me cutting! What would they have thought??? Would I have even cared??? I couldnt beleive that I had been that close. And then I realised that I wuld get that close to doing it again, it was enevitable, unless I did something...So from then until now I have just been keaping myslf busy every moment of everyday, I will admitt I still think about it at night....but atleast I have some control back. I am going to try and find a hobby, something to live for. I think that my recent predicament may inspire you to find a solution that will work for you. I am always here to talk if you need me. My AIM is

LostInEternity4

and my e-mail is

imasexaybeastrar@hotmail.com

Take care of yourself, and I hope this helps. I know how it is to have someone find your writing and realise what hasd been going on. I nearly strangled my boyfriend tuesday night, after I caught him reading my newest poem, so dont feel alone in this. There a re a lot of ppl going through the same thing. Luv~Katie

i have a lot of friends who cut, its not good, and yes it is addicting.goodluck
xx

thanks for your comments. Life has just been a total pain and with my mom finding out it sucks, I cant be alone for a few minutes if im depressed. things just keep going wrong

i ve been there i know how it feels when you think the only person you can count on is your friends and now they are running around so worried they look like your mother yeah i know exacly how ya feel check my poems out they might help!i'm here for ya girl!@!!

just stop cutting if you have a problem then deal with it in words and other ok things but not cutting it is horrible adn very addicting adn my friend did it once like 4 years ago adn teh scar is still there today as big adn noticable as ever
plz stop
save yourself

yeah i know cutting is very addicting, im trying to stop, but its really hard to

more cutting......*sigh*

if u want to stop cutting, dont go to websites where ppl are proud of their cutting, dont read articles saying anything about how cutting is good. these, by far, will nto help u get over ur cutting problem. there are ppl here that WIL help u. but if u want their help, do not make a public thread, instead, pm them. that way its private, u dont get any bashing, and u can get it all out without only that one person knowing.

just stay away from topics about cutting...ur thoughts..occupy them with what makes u happy...and if what makes u happy is cutting....go to a shrink. ur parents dont want to burry(sp) their daughter, so they will do their best to help you, even if it annoys the hell out of u. just stay away from other cutters and topics on cutting..and go for help...or ask someone here that sounds as tho they can help you (not a fellow cutter!!)

Don't cut, darling. Please. Save us from the cutting images >_>

I have never cut, but I have been stupid, yes, stupid, enough to attempt suicide..3 times..and yes, life can be painful and a large struggle, but you know, everyone has a life and has their own struggles, and it is possible to get through your problems without hurting youself.

Cutting is like doing drugs, if you please. They are an escape route from problems and the daily situations that happen. But cutting will do you no justice. Escaping pain is not the way to go. Instead find something else to do that isn't self-harming or dangerous to yourself. Get in an activity group or something you like to do that will keep your mind away from cutting.

Sometimes, when I get angry enough, I no longer think of suicide. Instead, I walk somewhere and scream my head off. Yes, I do. It feels nice, but it still doesn't get rid of your problems. Don't let anything get to your head. Seriously. Most of these things are just situations that will most likely be forgotten as you get older. Over and done with.
-------
Long post, I know, but I felt like I had to say all that. It's okay if you don't read all of it, but get my main message: Cutting is not the way to go, no matter how addicting it is.

Email: frosted.oceanwaves@gmail.com

^ Email if you wish to talk. ^

thanks for your post, i didnt mean I was proud i cut, but when you are in your mind set of cutting, its like wanting to make marks like that again,

That really wasn't needed. If you want to make comments like that, then you shouldn't even look at the topic.

Yes =\

Sorry, I'm just a tad bit of a sensitive person =\

Don't be sorry Satine, you are who you are, she is who she is, if you want to get defensive, you have a right to. If she wants to post honest comments, she has a right to. But don't be sorry or intimidated.
~*Fark*~

oh no I get it, i wasnt trying to get sympathy, its just i was getting comments, and trying to figure out what to do, my mom isnt too good with self harm, thanks for your comments

p.s. since when did post get pointless. post are to get advice, and it may be pointless to you but to others its a relief, if you dont like it then move on and look at others