favorite/funny away messages

NYzPrncs05: I'm in the shower...if you wanna see a live brodcast of me in the shower click here:- www.nyzprncs05picz.com

I don't have AIM, but my brother does:

"getting coffee cos i'm fucking dead-later"
not meant to be as funny as I found it, as apposed to dead now

"the teacher said sucking dick is fun so go suck dick" random

"spank you greenwald spank you very much"
this is from ace ventura: when nature calls

This is a sad and funny away message. The sad thing is you're IMing me thinking that I'm going to respond and the funny thing is that I'm sitting in front of the computer staring at the screen rolling on the floor laughing watching you IM me.

When God made girls He was so proud.
When God made boys He was so upset.
When God made me He was just showing off!

Here's mine: "I'm away, taking over the world with an army of crazed penguins. Leave a message, but it probably won't matter when the whole world has been enslaved by the Penguin Lord and I am elected the Penguin Goddess. Have a nice day."

-- Maharani of Angels

"Sorry I'm not here right now, there is a power failure and I'm stuck on the escalator"

"How do you keep an idiot in suspense? Leave a message and I'll get back to you..."

"I'm not talented enough to type and pick my nose at the same time."

" I fell out of my chair. This might take a while."

"I'm not here right now, if you'd like to reach me on my cell phone, buy me a cell phone."

"I am just putting this away message because everyone else is doing it."

"I've gone to find myself, and if I get back before I return. KEEP ME HERE!"

( )_( )
(='.'=)
(")-(") Arrivederci!

lol i like all of them

I always put some dumb rhyme in mine.

This is part of my away message for when I'm showering..

"In the shower getting squeaky clean!
Rub a dub dub, I'm in the tub! Er well, shower!
So I guess you'd have to say "rub a dub flower, I'm in the shower!" =D I'm so clever, oui? Oui."

This is my really retarded away message for sleeping..

"I'm in my bed, *snore snore*, love you all soooo much! leave a lil sum sum for me! ZzZzzZZZzzZzzzZzz [And the sugar plum fairies danced all night long!] I love you, you know who and yes i do, i do, i do...la la la, maybe I'm dreaming of you :o Dream of me too! Oh my I'm a poet...=D (S) SLEEP NOW *ZzZZzZZzzZZZz*"

I'm so silly....

Silly rabbi, kicks are for trids.

i am the cookie monsters secret sidekick and as the cookie monsters secret side kick i am required to eat all the cookies brb

-*-U DONT LIKE ME-*-
-*-THERE'S NUTTIN I CAN DO-*-
//!!NEWS FLASH HUNNIE!!\\
-*-I DONT LIVE 2 PLEEZ U-*-

this one or this one

a blonde, brunette, and a red head snuck into a potato factory and hid in three seperate bags of potatos, coz they saw a guard cumin.
the guard kicked the first bag which the red head was in.she went woof woof
he went to the next onre did the same.the brunette went meow meow.so the guard went to the third bag thinking "the first 2 bags were dogs and cats. what possibly could this bag hold?"
so he kicked it and the blonde went "P-O-T-A-T-O"

I'm away at the moment. I don't know why. I just feel like going away. I'm not even away from the computer. When I find out what im gonna do I'll tell you.

Fucking Teddy Bear in the Shower

I'm peeing in the Shower
holy shit be back in an hour

Mine are short, simple Johnny the Homicidal maniac quotes:

“Whether in a suit or in a loincloth people are ignorant little thorns cutting into one another.” –Nny

“I wonder if I’m still crazy. Go find a cheerleader and saw her legs off. OKAY, that answers that.” –Nny

“I know forgiveness is out of the question. I just ask for what we all ask of the people we respect- That the thought of me does not compel you to violent spasms of projectile vomiting.” –Nny

and

"Shut up! Leave me alone! I HAVE HEAD-EXPLODY!!!!!" - Nny

"I'm probably here right now, but I'm trying to avoid someone. Leave me a message and if I don't reply, that person is you."

"Please leave a message if you wanna win an all expense paid trip to the ignore button." (my own)

( )_( )
(='.'=)
(")-(") Arrivederci!

LMAO! I should use some of these.

my fav away message is.

im not here.. im an illusion.. see.. *waves arms*

-Just think if you were my homework I'd be doing you right now ;)

-Next time you're arguing with an idiot, make sure he isn't doing the same thing.

-A positive attitude will not solve all your problems...but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort

-Things to see and people to do! Be back later!