totally lost and afraid

all I can say to help is go with you heart, I know how hard it is dealing with past experiences, I have gone through shit w/ guys and every time that I would ask for help they never seem to say the right tings, so I wish I could help more but do what your heart tells you and everything should turn out ok.
BloodRedRose

wait what is the real reson? then maybe I could help more

if he cares about you, he will be glad that you tell him and he will most likely understand since rape is one of the things you don't like telling others, just explain how hard it is for you to tell him, I'm sure he will understand, tell him you have tried to gather the courage for a long while:) good luck and one question: have you seen a professional about the rape??? if not then maybe you should you might not be able to enjoy sex without some help! I have a friend that can't take any male touching her because she has a step dad that touch her in rather bad ways

i was raped to got pregnant so on..... look all i can tell u is dont ever let anyone persuade u to do something you arent ready for. it is still your body, and dont ever forget its YOUR choice!!! if he loves you he will wait and if he says he wont wait, he doesnt love you. its that simple. the guy i dated during that happened never pressured me. he went for about six months with nothing. and he never complained once. just dont rush yourself with this. if you arent ready and u do it, u may grow to resent him even when he was just doing what he thought u wanted. just be clear about what u want. good luck. i hope u are dealing ok.
Love,
Kelly