My ex and I friends? ...foolish

My ex girlfriend and I only went out for a month in June and some in July but our relationship grew since then. It seems we never stopped having feelings for one another, nor did they subside. However, we did our dance to move on...she got a b/f, I got a hobbie and a job...but things are still weird. Been a few months since we went out and she moved this past Monday. On Wensday she called from her new place and told me that she loves both me and her b/f...but also that she's torn to who really has her heart...who she is IN love with. I heard this only so many times before in our relationship as a couple and further on, I don't think she'll be with me...yet why do I believe? Why am I still in love with her...only now so deeply since we've met and gotten closer, why do I let her play her games with me?...aren't they games? It seems she's teasing me, only so much I can take. How is it that everytime I talk to her I manage to hold back on what I really feel about her....how can I be just friend with her? How can I just not look at her the same as I've always had...with love. Why is it that it makes no sense to an on looker, yet I know...I know we belong together. Why do I still dream of her every few nights? Why is it I still see us together in the future? Am I such a fool to believe in heart that we're meant to be...yet so "sensable" in my stubburn mind that it can't be?

...it's fine if no one answers, if no one reads...I guess I wanted to say what I really wanted to. Even though she'll never know since...right now, I simply can't be with her.
In her title taken, but...in her heart...split.

I'm really sorry about that. What I suggest is that you just try and move on... I know it's hard, but if she can't decide who she is IN love with, maybe she's just not worth the time... Let her be with her current bf, and you go look for someone else. I'm sorry, but if she's been with this guy for this long and still isn't willing to dump him for you, then why bother? You are just wasting your time, energy, and love. Find someone else to cherish... I know it's a lil blunt... sorry.
I also think that if you show her you don't care, she may realize that she is infact in love with you, and may come running back to you. You never know... but it is over, so you have to move on with your life... don't let the misery she has created for you be your way of life... Get out, meet someone, go on a couple of dates, have fun!
~BJ~

uhm, alright. Sounds more reasonable when someone else says it. I'll uh, go out and try to move on. Guess it's best for the both of us. Well...laterz.

I have been ina relationship for the past 2 years and i had to move 6000 miles away from him but i think you might be in love but i think you need to get out there and see what else is out there for you....If shes going to play games then you can get better, if she plays games then shes not worth it!!! Hope it all works out! i wish the best! later

yeh it does seem like this person is taking you for a ride..*big hugs* its so hard to move on, i know! But if you're meant to be together then you will be, if you're not, then you won't. "what will be, will be.."

Yeah, it feels like she's kinda playing with me. I could make endless "excuses" for her though. She has had it rough...always pushes people away, always been left by someone she cared about. I understand how that can feel, since I've lost and tried to close off as well...and that's one thing that brought us closer. It seems I'm not accepting it. I heard this from a friend that kinda reworded it. "If you are really in love, you can't just fall out of it...just only learn to live without." But how? Where would I start? In writing it sounds easy...but I know it's not. I thought I was doing good when I never met her, you know. Then I got to know...she kinda filled in the spot inside me and I never felt ...so happy. Then without her...it's like I'm missing a piece of me. We kinda the same in that department. It's why we're trying to be friends since then. Not doing so well exactly with that...

It's frustrating at times. You know, yesterday was her birthday...I called and wished her happy birthday and all. She told me she loved me again, was thinking about our last kiss and these little memories that are so special between us....and I just, tell her I love her too. Every time I can't just not say that I don't love her or nothing...because it wouldn't be the truth. Still, I didn't say I thought about it too...though I have, but...I didn't say. I don't want to feel this way when there's nothing that I can do, as far as I see.

It's like what the heck am I thinking? Come on now, is she really going to after all this be with me, and even if so...the distance now could be too much for our renewed relationship. *sigh* great, I'm arguing with myself again.
Where do I start with moving on?