its a poem about a little boy

he is like 6 yrs old and i think his daddy passed away and he talks about finding his moms gun on the top shelf of her closet and he talks about him killing hisself and he says all he wanted was love but he thinks he is bad but then kinda towards the end he says i hid this letter between the matresses of my bed and between the sheets of the note i placed one last kiss and then i think it ends w/ was i really that bad?...if u find it plz post the answer or tell me on juicycherries16@yahoo.com