parents...

today i got in a huge fight with my parents,
my mom this morning, she owns a shop and i told her i was going out today before, but i stayed at home to work on my homework instead
she got annoyed cause i didnt go to work and help her, and my parents think i try to piss them off on purpose?
i tried to talk to my parents all day and things only get worst.
i can't really talk to them and whenever i try all they do is whine and they even have less tolerance and preseverence than a 16 year old.
my parents always think about money and try to lie to themselves that they're good parents. they still ahve no idea that i have a boyfriend who i have been together with for over 6 months now and they can't even tell who my bestfriend is.
earlier when i tried to ask my mom if she thinks i get her mad on purpose, she said, its ok, i forgive you, you didn't mean it, you're just silly and blind.

but that isnt the point, she still doesn't get it. i'm not silly and blind, i'm trying to talk things out so we don't get into another stupid fight.

anyone have any advice or experience the same thing?

Parents have differenct pressures and pains than teens.....neither is easy. I have to focus, in order to not let my stress affect the relationship my son and I have. Fortunately, we share everything about our lives and he makes good choices. When he doesn't, he comes to me and we talk it out. Usually, by then he has punished himself, so I never have to. Your parents my be under so much pressure they can't or won't stop and see what is going on around them. It is tough. I work over 70 hours a week, but always make time, even if I lose sleep and I often do. Talk to your parents, be bigger than they are. Let them know you are aware of how much pressure they are under and you are under a ton of it too. Offer to be partners with them, not just their "kid". Hang in there. Remember these feelings, so that when you have kids, the cycle isn't the same.

yeah, that is so true..i dont know how parents do it..its harder than we think! but yeah, just let them know you appreciate them working and everything, make sure you tell them that because it will make them feel good!=) and alot of kids these days dont understand how much parents have to deal with, you know? it has to be really hard. But anyway, best wishes to you!

well.. i kinda know.. but it just doesnt really add up...
my mom owns her own shop, my dad's job is really flexible, we have a lot more money than we need.. and unfrotunately my dad wastes it on stupid things like financing for a 60k car that he now hates to drive x.x
like, to be honest, i have trouble finding something to respect them for sometimes, in terms of life probs or love probs, i cant talk to them about it since they can't seem to set some what of a good example? then school, well, i'm not one of those people who are smart and get everything, i work hard for marks and they can't help me with any thing for school... the way they earn money.. i find it digusting how they can profit so much when there are so many people living in poverty and we, well, they, have way more than they need and more than enough to get them what they want, but even for the tsunami last christmas, even i donated 4 times as much as they did x.x, and i hardly get any money

i try to talk to them and get my point across but then they start stuffing words in my mouth like i told them to shut up when i ask them to be a little more quiet? when they start yelling over me and interrupting me i raise my voice a little and they say i'm screaming at them and being louder than they are x.x

like, i feel like its always been a broken family
when i lived in hong kong, my parents hired maids to look after me,my dad spent most of the time in china somewhere, my mom had 7 shops throughout hong kong, making over $3000 USD profit each day, whenever they maid one small mistake, they were fired, i had over 50 maids in 4 years looking after me.

after we moved away, my dad got another job, same job he still has now, and my mom worked at home or else textile factories for 8 years, at home, she basically gave me chores to do or help her with her work or else i looked after my little brother

in high school now,
i'm on the school's honour roll,
from grade 8 until now, grade 11,
marks slowly rise from 6 B's and 2 A's to last year, 10 A's and 1 B, it really made no difference to them
like, no more attention or anything, just same old, they don't think i have any pressure and expect me to prioritize what they don't do before everything else i think is more important?

last year because i had these extra exams at the end of the year for 3 courses, they isolated me from my friends, even at lunch and afterschool, the only day i went out last year was on my 15th birthday, which my mom ruined in the end by assuming i rather go to downtown for a drive than having dinner with my friends

i try to talk to them but everytime they interrupt me and end up yelling at me for over half an hour

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anyways... its great though to know that theres some good parents out there =) i'm kind of jealous for those kids who have great parents who even try to understand their children and be friends with them even if they're really busy, but for my own parents things just don't really add up?
hopefully i wont be that kind of mom some day

wow...i have no idea what to say because ive never really been in that situation..But my dad has always been gone working and stuff..seemed to always care about money money money..but i guess thats just it, your parents have a love for money and tearing you all apart..i wish i could help you but i dont know whether or not you believe in God..i do, so i would say to pray, but like i said, i dont know.

well actually, i even told my boyfriend last week, i rather that they pretend not to care. my parents confuse me, they pretend to care and understand, but they don't, and they definately don't understand. i mean, they won't even let me tell them how i feel without getting yelled at

hm..well you know its always good to talk to someone about stuff youre going though you know? does your boyfriend help you? well, just wondering. And i know how that feels..maybe you should write them a letter? or do something that you know they will listen..because even though some of us think THEY should be the ones coming to us..trying to talk to us and stuff..thats not always the right thing to do. Everyone needs their parents and when they are not there, its our job to tell them..HEY REMEMBER ME!!? THE KID THAT DIDNT ASK TO BE BROUGHT INTO THIS WORLD?! ..ya know? because its their jobs as parents to be there..they brought us into this world..whether or not they like it..were here. And i think sometimes they think we dont have stuff to deal with and our problems are so little and "oh, we`ll get over it"..but no, thats not the way it is at all. Being a teen these days is hard. And i think you should try to write them a letter or something..because they would be thanking you for this later.

i don't think they'll read it
i had this homework sheet that my parents were supposed to read this thing and answer questions about me then sign it, i gave to my dad, he signed it and said ok, you do it, i told him i wasn't going to and he just left it there. and my mom got annoyed and yelled at him and he looked at one question
"Who would your child vote for in federal election if they could vote?"
and my dad picked up a flyer(it was just time for municipal election) and put the name of a municipal party x.x

after that, my mom tried to fill it out and i lied to her about the answers, she asked me while she wrote down answers... that was the only night they asked something about me that had nothing to do with me helping them with their work, but i guess they just didn't want to seem like bad parents on paper

and i think how they think is, 'i brought you into this world, now its time for you to repay me'? lol... what's weird is.. sometimes i wonder if i was an accident, or if my parents should even have kids at all, 'cause other than the love they have for eachother, they don't seem to love any other human being, which includes brothers and sisters and family

Hang in there and when you have children, be the kind of parent you wish you had. That is what I did. I am the parent to my son, that I wish mine had been to me. The cycle has to be broken sometime.

ugh, i can relate. i mean, i love my parents, and all, but PLEASE!!! my mom is always yelling at me and my sister about every stupid thing we do wrong. my dad and i normally say, like 3 sentence to each other if we're lucky. all he wants to do is watch tv, drink his beer, and be on his computer. i try to stay away from him. can you believe, i'm scared of my own dad. isn't it pathetic? i normally stay in my room whenever i'm home, especially when my mom's in one of her moods.sorry, i don't really have any advice. all i can say is don't start cutting, because once you start, it's SO hard to stop.

well... hopefullie you and your sister have an ok relationship :)
im chinese and they have this stupid one child law in most of china? in our culture males are a lot more favoured than females since the males carry on the family name and traditionally, women would grow up and marry someone, possibly being a man's 3rd or 4th wife? and they were mostly treated like property.

i'm oldest and i'm a girl, also have a younger brother, i don't get along with him at all and you can't say anything about him, if you do he'll just start yelling at you. he also punched me few times (in the stomach, once while i was really sick)before so, i'm basically scared of my entire family.

the thing is, i have no idea when my parents have mood swings, its scary. maybe once in about 7 or 8 weeks they'll be nice? but never for more than 4 hours. sometimes i rather they just stick to one act, makes me wonder if they have split personality or something x.x

and, i have a friend who cuts, but she totally abused that to try to manipulate people. i really hope whoever reads this and cuts try to stop, even though it might help you get what you want for a short term, would you really want those things if people didn't really want to give it those things to you? and anyways, all you're doing is harming yourself, physically, and mentally and emotionally, everyone who cares about you; friends, family, boyfriend/girlfriend...

Well, it is hard for me to know what to say, because in my oppinion I have the best parents in the world.
Yeah, I don't tell them everything, but then again my life isn't meant to be an open book.

I do have a suggestion though... Dinner talk.
Now here's the deal, while you are eating dinner, or after dinner, when you all are together.. You should start conversation.
Parents don't mean to hurt their children.. And they make it up as they go, there is no guidebook to raising children.
But you should tell them how you feel, and if they get mad... let them.
as long as you talk, comunicate... once everything is out in the open you have respect, tolorence, and understanding amongst yourselves.
If you have some free time and you are bored, help out.
If you need help with something ask them.. just know how to comunicate and ussualy things work out fine :)

the thing is, i can't talk...
i have trouble respecting people who are disrespectful, and when im supposed to respect parents who won't even let me talk, its kinda hard for me.

i try to talk to them but i always get yelled at, i know they make it up, i make things up as i go too, but to the thing is, can parents who love their children really feel no guilt when they hurt their children's feelings?

like i said, when i asked my parents to quite down a little, they scream at me saying how disrespectful i am to tell them to 'shut up'