Giving up ..

I have been waking up this past few days and feeling so low and empty that I just want to give up. I can't handle the feelings inside me any more and want it all to end. I'm not going to commit suicide or anything as I know that's stupid, but I can't say I havn't thought about it. Is there anything I can do to help this feeling?

Yes, the best thing to do, it talk to someone. Usually people have words of encouragement that will help you feel a lot better, and will help you make sense of your life. If you need someone to talk to, I am here for you. I am a really good listener, and I am sure I can make you smile :)

If you are not the person who easily opens up to strangers, then look to your close friends. If you don't feel like talking about your problems, then write them down in a journal or some place private. Sometimes it's what's stored up is what is bothering us. Maybe you could pick up a leisure activity or something, sports or music? Something for the short term helping. Well, I can only give you ideas, so hopefully things work out. Again, if you need someone to talk to, just message me. IO am here to help :)

Hey Darien, thanks so much. I may take you up on that offer, i'm likely to find it easier to open up to you than to some of my close friends. Thank you.

Yeah, Kim. She just likes dot dot dotting people, but I'll ... her if she doesn't quit it!

Yeah i've noticed she likesto dot people this past few hours! Kinda irritating!

hmm .. sorry i know someone already helped you and everything. I just need to vent and i didnt wanna start my own little thing. So you can ignore this if ya want lol...

You cant help but think about it everyday. You know you'll never do it, but you wonder "who would miss me" "is the pain worth it" . Even on your most up days, you think "why not kill myself, so I can die happy". Its scary, but it just crosses your mind. You hope for something bad to happen to you so that ppl finally realize you need them. You want to open up to your friends but your scared they wont be there for you, betray your trust, look at you differently or not care. I hate this. I hate it more than anything in the world. Once you've been thru a depression that involves cutting n suicidal thoughts YOUR NEVER THE SAME! Even when your happy, your still sad. Nothing makes it better....you laugh n you smile, but inside you die a little more cuz your just faking it and you want it to all be real. You wanna tell everyone how you feel, you wanna let them know that your fragile, and you need to talk to them and you need a hug, but you always hold back, always. I wanna be able to trust again, but its been broken so many times that I'm scared to let people in. And plus.. everyone I've ever let in well.. its sad. I've only really let 2 ppl into my life and I've drifted apart from them. I don't want that to happen, I'm scared for that to happen. I want this to all be different! I wish it was different...

just in case u wanted to know the dot dot dot is actually called ellipsis.

I know it's called an ellipsis, but dot sounds better.

Amy, that's exactly how I feel. Exactly. It's so hard yet you can't give up. Would I be able to email you sometime?

Amy I recognize that so much... It's crazy... I've been like in a good mood throughout a whole day and then suddenly thoughts like that come to me. I don't like letting people into my life either... I was really open when I was a kid but when people started freezing me out I closed up. One person I was open to but we drifted away from each other.

Alex, yeah the same as me. I've only properly opened up to one person and she's drifted away from me. I also used to be open as a kid but, like you, people started freezing me out and now it's rally hard to talk to me.