CC&P Poetry Challenge Winners

CC&P had another poetry contest… This time everyone was to take on old poem and revise it… We had two age categories to vote on and the winners are:

22 and Over ~ Simon Hayes ~ “I Speak”
21 and Under ~ Darien ~ “I Played Violin”

Congratulations to both of you… Beautiful and heartfelt writes.

Both the old and the revised writes are below:

Simon
I Speak ~ OLD

I speak of wisdom,
I speak alone,
I speak of sorrow and faulty tone.
I speak so lonely like shattered glass,
I speak out loud so time will pass.
I speak as if I have no care,
I speak as if there's no-one there.
But when I speak, my words are true,
My words so humbly... needing you!!

I Speak ~ REVISED

I speak with wisdom
A well known emotion
Loneliness like an ocean
For this there is no potion

I speak from heart
Tonight while we are apart
I'm thinking of you
Is it enough to get me through?

I speak alone
This pain, I hear it drone
These four walls enclosing me
Need you here to set me free

I speak of sorrow
My heart's in pain, longs for tomorrow
Tomorrow when you are here
To take away my pain and fear

I speak out loud
Like shouting out amongst a crowd
Still no one hears
My cry of fears

I speak because there's no one here
No one that I hold so dear
No one else would better do
There'll only ever be one you

When I speak, my words are true
The words so humbly... needing you!!

Darien
I Played Violin ~ OLD

I play my wrists like a violin,
and every vein is a note.
I'll write you a song,
about a boy who died for love.

Everyday he wakes up alone,
without a care in the world.
Never heard a ring from his phone,
he hopes to hear from his girl.

At night he falls asleep crying,
wishing for things to be good.
His heart in his throat dying,
and his words are misunderstood.

The walls painted blood red,
his wrists the paint brush.
Thinks he's better off dead,
for losing his first crush.

The radio plays a sad song,
he plays the beat on his wrist.
Wonders what he's done wrong,
as he clenches his fist.

Visions of her haunt his mind,
leaving him for another guy.
Another love he cannot find,
he's scared by her deadly lie.

The song is near its end,
and he is slowly going.
The last vein for his friend,
she won't end up knowing.

Violins are now playing,
another song has begun.
His body there laying,
in pools that he sung.

I Played Violin ~ REVISED

I play my wrists like a violin,
and every vein is a note.
I'll write you a song,
about a boy who died for love.

Everyday he wakes up alone,
without a care in the world.
Not a ring from his phone,
he hasn't heard from his girl.

At night he falls asleep crying,
wishing for things to be good.
His heart in his throat dying,
and his words are misunderstood.

The walls are painted blood red,
his wrist was the paint brush.
He thinks he's better off dead,
for losing his first and only crush.

The radio plays his favorite song,
he plays the beat on his wrist.
Wonders what he did wrong,
tears fall as he clenches his fist.

Visions of her haunt his mind,
leaving him for another guy.
A new love he cannot find,
on his knees he starts to cry.

The song is near it's end,
and he is slowly going.
The last vein for his friend,
she won't end up knowing.

Violins are now playing,
another song has begun.
His body left laying,
in pools that he sung.

congrates to both of you! the improvements were great! sounds like a fun group activity

~Jacklyn

Well done both of you.

Congratulations!

Congrats guys...well done.

congratulations guys!!!

Thanks peeps :)

^^^ My fears and suspicions are now confrimed, Bob is a cross-dresser! =( LMAO

Thanks everyone :)

Sorry Bob I can't help with those poems. They are just too good to touch. As for your house, I can do that :)

It's ok Steven, there's one in every group.
I'm not sure who our cross-dress is though ...

congrats
xxx