Obsession-with a person. Anyone else?

Cared about this guy for four years and I have barley ever talked to him. Iv seen him grow up and it does not seem to matter that he is a jerk I still care about him. He knows I care about him but would not talk about it with me so when I noticed to my shock he was on a website I am on a few weeks back and mailed him and...he printed it out and put it up in school! So I printed out another letter and put it up before sending it to him to checkmate him. It basically said I just wanted to talk to him and could not understand why he was being so immature about it...But then I made the mistake of sending it to him as well and that gave him the op of saying "you need help, I don’t like you" ect...I mean I dunno what to do. I should just be able to say he is a jerk and move on, but I look at him and all I see is the person I care about so much. I have to go back to school and face him and he thinks im crazy but if i dont go back, he's won...and I will miss him. Ive never been suicidal or a cutter or anything along those lines but it feels like this is the last straw. N there is this girl...if he and her get together it might push me over the edge cause I already put up with the last gf for a year and a half n...i dont want that to start over again. Don't ask me why I care about him I just do. Is there anyone that else has that prob or something along these lines. Please...does anyone understand anything I have felt...?
Xx

i know how you feel. i liked a kid for a really long time, and he didnt have any interest in me. then, one day he asked me out. well to make things short he treated me like crap and then dumped me. he was only after one thing. and now, i have to watch him and his new girlfriend do things me and him used to do. it kills me so much, because i truly loved him. and i knew he was a jerk before we started going out. i thought he would be different, but he wasnt. so now i'm lonlier than ever and heartbroken.
this probably didnt help, and im sorry if it didnt. but i thought it might make you feel better if you knew someone else who had this type of problem. sorry if i wasted your time.
lauren

No course u have not. Thanks for posting. Xx
C the odd thing is with me-I don’t know the guy. Maybe I love him for who I want him to be not for who he is. But...urgh it is just so bloody hard. N there is no help on it. I mean there are ppl u can talk to if you are a drug addict or depressed but...think about it-there must be millions of ppl out there that have this problem and all they need is to be able to talk it through with the person they care about. But because the person does not understand and has not been taught how to deal with the situation they just treat us like we're nuts...or just a nothing. No wonder some ppl go nuts and start stalking ppl (No im not). Though I guess stalking involves the intension to harm. I just wish the guy was smart and nice enough to just go "look do you want to talk about this" but he is just a jerk grr...I have just cried so much over the past few years and everyone tells me he is not worth it and I can see that now...so why do I still care?!? Don't like to call it love because that makes me feel more trapped. Its an infatuation I guess...

Heya, this reminds me of one of my first crushes...and he really was a jerk. I must have liked him for a year or so, and we "went out" for like 2 weeks, i found out he was only with me to shut my friend up..that hurt..I know its not exactly the same as your situation, so i'm not actually sure why i'm saying it..but you mentioned something about cutting...i don't know you, but please don't cut yourself over him.
I don't want to sound nasty, but he doesn't seem interested, he's taking you for a ride. I don't know why you still care about him when you know he's a jerk, but i think you need to try and forget about him, and i know its hard to do, but your obsession isn't healthy at all, and its only making you really depressed. I guess i'm not being much help, its just my view..

This reminds me of my ex. I didn't know him for the two years he was going out with my friend. I had a thing for him, but he thought i was crazy and didn't like me at all. Finally i started talking to him and we became best friends. The porblem was i liked him more then a friend. After his g/f broke up with him...well i was the one to comfort him. After about a month my friend asked if he liked me because he kept saying his sister thought he did and a week later he asked me out. We broke up a month and 2 weeks later but i guess it was worth it. At least i got to see what he was like. I think you should approach him and get to know him. See what happens from there.

I have never been crazy about a guy, especially if I knew he is a jerk. so I don't have the same experience as U guys do. But I did know how it feel to have a person crushing on U & think that U are a heartless woman (jerk), for knowing how he feel & still ignore him & go out with someone else.

anyway, i think U should try to take thing slow with this guy, try to let him see that you're not weird or anything & that all U want is to get to know him, & hoping that he get to know U too. ^_^